This made me chuckle, particularly when she threw the newspaper in the fireplace but then immediately retrieved it.
Both of their voices were so clear and easy for me to hear as I was reading and they seemed like . . . honestly, like I was listening to my grandparents arguing. Haha! Anyway, awesome job at characterization there. :) I enjoyed reading this quite a bit.
I liked how you played with my expectations. I naturally assumed that this was a hero academy.
And the ending was quite a turn. Nice work!
Dialogue between the two at the end was very natural. I felt like I had a good idea of who each of them were as people by the end, so nice character work as well.
I don't usually read a ton of horror genre pieces but I do have a fascination with Vampires. This was a really interesting take on them!
The line that is sticking with me as the most creepy is this one:
"Sally and Bert have been bitten twice as well; there are no temper-tantrums in our home."
It's just so matter of fact in its delivery. Kid's acting up? Just give 'em a quick nip. They'll learn. And they did.
I wasn't expecting the direction of this and I like to be surprised. I was impressed with where it went. The chaos that is the end result of reckless violence . . . and the escalation was so fast that it was a bit horrific in the speed with which things fell apart.
I love the contrast of modern stars and beauty with the reference to the ancient gods. It ages the mirror into timelessness and hints at how celebrity is like a modern pantheon.
The line about the rearview made the mirror relatable as well. I felt that anyway, with the mirrors snark but to throw in that yearning was a great touch. Probably everyone feels some of that. But perhaps, particularly the artists and writers. We try to make ideas bigger with our words.
There's a strong sense of personality in the character of the mirror. A bit of tiredness at human folly and sadness and strength because of what it has seen but there's still hope there, to see better, a longing to experience true beauty. (A longing that the mirror may be trying to hide behind its attitude.) But in the end, trapped by the truth.
This is a really great twist on the story. I love how much he cared about getting the trinkets done for the children. And the sense of longing from both him and Mary. These things made the ending that much more impactful.
I was also very curious about Mary's life prior to the story. I love a story that leaves me wondering about the characters afterward. :)
Never have I wanted a job more than to be a book buyer for the fae. Siobhan is living the dream.
I like the amount of characterisation that was put into the second paragraph. It all felt very natural and I had a sense of who this person was very quickly.
I could almost feel the disgruntled nature of the fae as well. Cliffhangers. We've all been there.
I feel like this is a great example of what can be accomplished in the flash fiction format. I really enjoyed it.
A nice glimpse into viewing life with a baby (I remember those days and learning their expressive, wordless language) and a great description of the bond that can be between a mother and her child.
This is really cool. I'd never heard of this type of poem before. You've done a really spot-on representation of the subject. Great word choices. I could see my own dog doing all of these things with a sense of glee radiating from her.
And then the last word. . . it halted all of that with a vision of her outside and turned away from me, sniffing the air, so apart in her experience.
This tricked me! I clicked on it thinking that it would be "The Three Little Pigs." And then it wasn't, but then it kind of was! Nicely done. Nothing went in the direction I expected and that's always a good experience to have while reading. Kudos on the line about the wolf grinning sheepishly.
The only thing I could see that might need altered is the line, "The wolf peaked out the window then." Peeked rather than peaked.
The imagery here is pretty great. I could see everything very clearly in my mind as I read this and I love the contrasting light and darkness between the surface of sea and flashes of light from the fish.
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