~*~First let me welcome you to writing.com! Second, let me point out that I have a 25kb limit for my forum, but I'll review this anyways. (It's not that much bigger, and I did say the conditions were flexible.) Third, this is a promising piece and I have just a few suggestions. My comments are in between the ~*~~*~. Anything else is quoted from your story. (The comment/quote sets are also numbered.)~*~
1. ~*~From Your Description:~*~ Elfarrian want to be a mage, not a scholar. He sets of into an unforgettable journey...
~*~"Elfarrian wants"~*~
2. It was all he could do to stop from shouting. But the elves were a people of tranquility. He respected that element of his heritage.
~*~ I think you should combine two of the above sentences. You might also want to change "stop" to "keep" or something else since he wasn't shouting, so there was nothing to stop.~*~
3.They could tell some magic was afoot, but what it was, even they, the great stargazes of the Larrwian elves, could not tell.
~*~ This was just incase you meant "stargazers."~*~
4. Slowly. he turned the heavy, yellow-white pieces of parchment until he found a blank page.
~*~ Typo. The period after "slowly" should be a comma.~*~
5. Elfarrian shut the book, destroying his dream. He would never become a mage.
~*~ I think you should change the period after "dream" to a semicolon, and decapitalize "he" etc.~*~
6.That was all his parents ever talked about; being safe.
~*~ Improper semi-colon use. Check out "Invalid Item"  by A Guest Visitor for the proper use of a semicolon.~*~
7.Then he looked carefully at the stones. Five of them were raised. The beams of light were not coming from windows on the ceiling, but the stones. Each had a magical symbol on it. Elfarrian had no doubt about where he was. He was in the Shrine of the Great Star.
~*~ You use a lot of simple sentences. More sentence variety would be nice. (That's just an example above.)~*~
8.He felt the same anxiety of his parent the night before, the same invisible magic.
~*~ I think "parent" should be changed to "parents."~*~
9. Elfarrian reached out to grasp the stones, feel their power flow through him.
~*~ I think you should add a "to" in front of "feel."~*~
10.In was bolted closed.
~*~ Typo. "In" --> "It"~*~
11.How, I do not know, for the stones have not revealed that if I cannot succeed than I fear the worst.
~*~ ????? I'm confused... ~*~
12. Ever since the fighters of the darkness had come form out of nowhere, the magical orbs that controlled the magical orbs that controlled the balance between magic and daily life had been perpetually guarded.
~*~ Typo. "form" --> "from" You also typed "the magical orbs that controlled" twice.~*~
13.When Elfarrian awoke he was in a small dome, with a door on the farthest side.
~*~ Sorry this one's out of order, but I don't see how he could be in a small dome if there is a lake in there.~*~
14.The walls were no longer solid marble.
~*~ I thought they were made out of some strange, flowing stuff that was solid?~*~
15.The creature shifted his weight nervously, and spoke, "Yer and elf, right? Well anyways I'm a dwarf it that's what you were wonderin'. My name is Gellan. Anyway, ye wouldn't want ta come ta my land. There's ware. Oh, we can handle the goblins nasty as they are, but the shadows..." the dwarf's voice trailed off, and he started shivering.
~*~ Typos. "and" --> "an" "it" --> "if"
"ware" --> "war" I also think "the" should be capitalized here.~*~
16.Despite Elfarrian's thought's, the bird's taste was tolerable.
~*~ "Thoughts" shouldn't be possesive. ("thought's --> "thoughts") I also think that you should make "bird's" plural. ("bird's" --> "birds')~*~
17. "Interesting," stated Gellan. "Very interesting. It seems like these stepping stones are a portal, really. And I also believe that you are a mage of some sort. No matter what you think, anyone who can activate the power of something like those stones of yours has to have magic. Now I'm going to sleep."
~*~ Your dialogue is a bit boring here. Gellan has almost no personality. If it's really so interesting to him, why would he go to sleep?~*~
18.He had seemed nice enough the nigh before.
~*~ Typo. "nigh" --> "night"~*~
19.So many events showed a good and a bad side of Gellan.
~*~ What many events? They only met yesterday, and promptly camped after that.~*~
20.The Sound of the door locking seemed to be the sound of fate.
~*~ Why is "sound" capitalized here?~*~
21.Now a kindly dwarf had befriended him and showed him that real adventurers stick together.
~*~ How did the dwarf show him that real adventurers stick together? They only met yesterday, and camped imiediently afterwards. Then, Elfarrian woke up trapped, with no idea about what happened. Then, he sees that Gellan was captured too. ~*~
22.Without a word the two embraced in that cell, which seemed to slowly become less ominous.
~*~ I don't see how they became so close. ~*~
23. "At you service," he said, bowing.
~*~ Typo. "you" --> "your"~*~
24.This was not dark and mysterious like the ones Elfarrian was so used to hearing in his cage.
~*~ Are you referring to the voice? Also, I don't see why he's used to hearing dark and mysterious voices if he only heard them once.~*~
25. Now it was Elfarrian's turn to be surprised. Dwarves were known for gruffness and for having no feelings.
~*~ The two were hugging earlier. Why is this surprising? ~*~
26.However, the strings of magic tie when they are ready, and there is no knowing when that could be.
~*~ I'm totally lost here...~*~
27. Out of Elfarrian's imprisonment tower lay the dark land of Warlarnia. It was a land always covered by storm could, at the point but never bursting.
~*~ I think you should change "out" to "outside."~*~
28. Its man was a soft silvery color, and its body was pure white.
~*~ Typo. "man" --> "mane"~*~
29."Your dwarf friend spoke it," said the unicorn with a pained laugh, nodding at Gellan. Then the animal continued, "I am close to death. Please, let me shed my horn for your staff as a favor. You shall need all magic you can get for the last effort."
~*~ I think you should add "the" in between "all" and "magic."~*~
30.Then it writhed as if it were a snake, and when it was once again still, with three curved points at the top, meeting at the tips. Elfarrian had become a mage.
~*~ ???? Maybe change "when" to "then"...~*~
31. They could not stop for all their effort.
~*~ Who's "they"? I thought only Elfarrian was being pulled by the book.~*~
32.Yet however far off it was, it seemed to close.
~*~ "to" --> "too"~*~
33. the two friends, the two companions, the two heroes walked into the distance hand in hand.
~*~ "the" should be capitalized.~*~
~*~Overall~*~
~*~ You have a great start and with some editing, this will be a great piece. I feel maybe you should "show not tell" a little more and add some more sentence variety. I also feel the character development was lacking a bit, Gellan particularly. (I also thought that everything kind of fell into Elfarrian's lap.) I hope you find my review helpful, ~*~Ivy~Frozen~*~
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Cool story;) I just have a few suggestions. My comments are now green, and quotes from your piece are blue. (The comment/quote sets are also numbered.) 
~*~Overall~*~ 
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I just have a few suggestions. My comments are now green, and quotes from your piece are blue. (The comment/quote sets are also numbered.) 
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Thanks for entering my contest;) I hope to see you in future rounds. Click the picture to go to the contest and see the winners;)