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26
26
Review of Lyrics: Mommy  
In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers  
Rated: E | (5.0)
*Flower4* Hi Kings! Thanks for making me cry! *Pthb**Laugh* *Flower4*



*Reading*MY INITIAL THOUGHTS*Reading*

This song broke my heart. Death is a sad thing, to be sure - but when its a child...so much sadder. *Cry*

Character(s):

The little girl, terminally ill, talking to her mommy. Very well portrayed!

Storyline/Plot:

The child, knowing that she's dying, wants to comfort the mother, letting her know she's going to Heaven, where she will be whole again. There are many Country songs that are true tear-jerkers. Yours falls into this category. Kudos! *Stary*

Dialogue:

The dialogue of the child talking to her mommy is believable. The age is not given, but is hinted that she is a small child, perhaps between six and ten, judging from the dialogue.




*Heart*MY FAVORITE PART(S):*Heart*

Well, normally something that makes me cry would not have a favorite part, but here goes:

"Mommy, don't cry I will wait for you.
In heaven I will be God's angel too.
" Crying again, thanks. *Facepalm*


*Idea*SUGGESTIONS:*Idea*


The only thing I found was that the light pink was hard on my eyes...could've been the tears, but I'm not sure. Perhaps hot pink might work just as well?

Other than that, perfect grammar, spelling and punctuation. Great job! *Badge*



*Vine1*IN CLOSING*Vine2*

Thank you for sharing this bittersweet song. On the one hand, the child will die. On the other hand, she won't suffer any longer. Unfortunately, both my hands are soaked in tears. You definitely got the reaction you were going for! *Pthb*

Did I mention it made me cry? *Bigsmile*

I think you are a very good writer,and I hope to read more from you soon. Keep up the good work, & Keep Writing! *Pencil*

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*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
27
27
Review of Is You?  
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (5.0)
*Flower4* Hi Dave! Thanks for sharing this funny poem! *Smile* *Flower4*



*Reading*MY INITIAL THOUGHTS*Reading*

This cracks me up, because I do have a problem with comma placement - sometimes.

Character(s):

YOU: Taunting editors, which is pretty awesome. They keep writers on edge, so why not push their buttons?*Bigsmile*

Storyline/Plot:

Your storyline is believable, as a writer challenging editors, lol.

Dialogue:

N/A


*Heart*MY FAVORITE PART(S):*Heart*

"sittin' up there in your ivory tower,
to trash manuscripts by the reams,
don't give you no right to squash my dreams." Well said!


*Idea*SUGGESTIONS:*Idea*

None that I could find. Perfect spelling, grammar and punctuation. Great job! *Badge*


*Vine1*IN CLOSING*Vine2*

Thanks again for sharing this cute, relatable poem.

I think you are a very good writer,and I hope to read more from you soon. Keep up the good work, & Keep Writing! *Pencil*

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*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
28
28
Review of a letter  
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (4.5)
*Flower4* Hi khushboo! Thank you for sharing this touching letter! *Smile**Flower4*



*Reading*MY INITIAL THOUGHTS*Reading*

I really like this letter. It is a touching tribute to lessons learned.

Character(s):

YOU: speaking to your childhood self, and giving wonderful advice from hindsight.

Storyline/Plot:

The plot of this letter is very well-written and concise. The point is to teach your former self the lessons you learned along the way, and you do a great job. Kudos! *Stary*

Dialogue:

N/A


*Heart*MY FAVORITE PART(S):*Heart*

"Don’t let anyone ruin your childhood. Always be yourself. The only shame is to have shame.
Stay strong.
Your Older Self" Well said!



*Idea*SUGGESTIONS:*Idea*

Here are some tweaks I think will help:

First things first. It is always preferrable to break your work down into paragraphs. Reading large blocks of text can be hard on the eyes, and you don't want your readers to bypass your work based on this. *Smile*

● "But don’t you dare to give your all to him because for him you will just be a toy to fulfill his sexual desire."

● "Your first love no comma , will transform you into an insensitive person. space you You will start having relationship problems."

● "All these catastrophes no comma , will steal your soul, and will turn you into a person you later regret. People will start judging you, they will call you a slut."

● " Then you will meet someone, you will spend 6 months with him period But that person won't fall for you as he was already stuck in his own past relationship."

● "He won't give you love that you longed for no comma , since childhood."

● "He will make every effort no comma , to keep you happy."


*Vine1*IN CLOSING*Vine2*

Thanks again for sharing your letter. Please don't be discouraged by my suggestions. We all need them to become better writers - afterall, isn't that why we're here? *Wink*

I think you are a very good writer,and I hope to read more from you soon. Keep up the good work, & Keep Writing! *Pencil*

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*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
29
29
Review of DOMINO EFFECT  
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: 18+ | (4.5)
*Flower4* Hi Donkey Hoetay (clever name - fighting windmills much?)! Thanks for sharing this suspense-filled story! *Smile* *Flower4*



*Reading*MY INITIAL THOUGHTS*Reading*

I loved this story, from start to finish. Like a great novel, I didn't want it to end.

Character(s):

Your characters were very believable. There I had prepared myself to hate Twig, but by the time he spoke to his father without even taking the money, I had a profound respect for him. He was a sad soul who just wanted his mother - the only one who loved him.

Storyline/Plot:

This storyline was perfect. Miah, through you, was a genius. Though from the description I knew Miah had a score to settle, but I was so shocked when I found out why. I didn't see that coming, nor the ending. So clever! This story evoked emotions; anger, sadness, shock. You've got a winner here. *Stary*

Dialogue:

The dialogue was very natural and believable. I felt it to be Jamacian at first, but island culture dialect to be sure.


*Heart*MY FAVORITE PART(S):*Heart*

There are so many...

"Why do you think you are here? Why do you think you are tied up with a fishing net and rope?" asked Miah.

"I don' know."

"You are here because I am a fisherman. I am good at it in the sea and I am good at it on land. You just have to know what kind of bait to use. I love it. I knew Miah was waiting for Twig to break in, but I didn't know that he wanted him to see the money. Even the "accident" was planned out. Clever! *Bigsmile*



*Idea*SUGGESTIONS:*Idea*

I found a couple of typos that were overlooked:

● "Regardless of the odds, He he turned and began preparing for his arrival in the early morning hours.

● " "You hear from my mother recently? Letter? Phone call? Anything?" blurted twig Twig out of the blue."

Other than that, perfect grammar, spelling and punctuation. Great job! *Badge*

*Vine1*IN CLOSING*Vine2*

Thanks again for sharing this amazing story. It was a pleasure to read. *Smile*

I think you are a very good writer,and I hope to read more from you soon. Keep up the good work, & Keep Writing! *Pencil*

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*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
30
30
Review of Choice:Chapter 1  
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (4.5)
*Flower4* Hi April (my name is April, too)! Thanks for sharing this compelling chapter! *Smile* *Flower4*



*Reading*MY INITIAL THOUGHTS*Reading*

I really enjoyed this chapter, and look forward to reading more...and this is not normal for me. I am usually bored with novels by the end of the first chapter - my attention span isn't very long! *Laugh* Dystopian is one of my new favorite genres!

Character(s):

Your characters are very believable. Flora, newly orphaned, has put up a wall between herself and prying strangers, and even relatives. This is understandable and quite natural.

Storyline/Plot:

The storyline flows smoothly, and lures the reader in with Flora's unanswered questions. The fact that, although poor, Flora can find such positive aspects of her former life versus this new, wealthier one, is also quite realistic. Money can't buy happiness.

Dialogue:

Very realistic and natural. Its like listening to actual conversations. Kudos! *Stary*


*Heart*MY FAVORITE PART(S):*Heart*


" My eyes once again well up. I force the tears away by sheer will. I will not cry, not yet. Tears will inevitably come later. Night is always hard." Speaking from experience after losing both parents young, this is so true.





*Idea*SUGGESTIONS:*Idea*

There is only one thing I noticed: When I got to the dream sequence, it confused me for a second. My advice would be to italicize this part, so it is immediately recognizable as a dream. *Smile*



*Vine1*IN CLOSING*Vine2*

Thanks again for sharing this intriguing chapter. I will be back to read/review more!

I think you are a very good writer,and I hope to read more from you soon. Keep up the good work, & Keep Writing! *Pencil*

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*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
31
31
Review of Two Halves  
In affiliation with WDC Addicts Anonymous  
Rated: E | (5.0)
*Flower4* Hi Choconut! Thanks for sharing this lovely poem! *Smile* *Flower4*




*Heart*MY FAVORITE PART(S):*Heart*

"melancholia, misery, joviality," Very good word usage! Kudos! *Stary*


*Idea*SUGGESTIONS:*Idea*

None that I could find. Perfect grammar, spelling and punctuation. Great job! *Badge*


IN CLOSING

Thanks again for sharing this pretty poem. Diamante is a wonderful style of poetry - one that I want to practice on. You did an amazing job with this one. *Checkg*

I think you are a very good writer,and I hope to read more from you soon. Keep up the good work, & Keep Writing! *Pencil*



*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
32
32
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (5.0)
*Flower4* Hi Nixie! Thanks for sharing this hilarious story! *Flower4*



*Reading*MY INITIAL THOUGHTS*Reading*

I found your story while searching for a funny story to review. I was not disappointed. It started as an adorable story about kids and a kitten, then quickly all heck turned loose! *Wink*

Character(s):

I'm still not sure if this is a fictional story or an anecdote, but either way I love your characters. The kids are cute and predictable; the mom is typical for one planning a big event, and the dad is just being a dad, relaxing and reading the paper, as he should on his birthday.

Storyline/Plot:

Just the combination of utterly stressed mom, baking, and kids is enough to expect that something disastrous is likely to happen - but throw in a precocious kitty and chaos ensues!

Dialogue:

I found the dialogue natural and quite believable, especially the "grunt" from Jason! Tween boys and video games do not make a good platform for any work getting done. *Laugh*




*Heart*MY FAVORITE PART(S):*Heart*

● " She probably took one of her "nerve pills" to calm the jitters."

AND


● "Mom was trembling, trying to cover the crack in the cheesecake with cherries." My sister, poor dear, has the same issue - just the littlest things make her feel torn apart. So I can definitely relate to this.

● "As we filed out the door, Dr. Zhivago maintained his ballerina-pawed delicacy and surveyed the damage with one turquoise eye, as if to say, "What's the problem? The place looks great, and the cheesecake was awesome." *Laugh* - 'nuf said!

I must say, most of the things the naughty kitty got into, I was fully expecting, because, well, I'm a mom! Lol.


*Idea*SUGGESTIONS:*Idea*

None that I could find. Perfect grammar, punctuation and spelling. Great job! *Badge*


*Vine1*IN CLOSING*Vine2*

Thank you for sharing is uproariously funny story. Its always such fun when people and objects start flying in all directions! *Laugh* *Laugh* *Stary*

I think you are a very good writer, and I hope to read more from you soon. Keep up the good work, & Keep Writing! *Pencil*

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*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
33
33
Review of Keep me safe  
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (4.5)
*Flower4* Hi NurseWriter! Thank you for sharing this touching story! *Flower4*


*Reading*INITIAL THOUGHTS*Reading*

This story made my heart ache. It is something that I see each day at the Pharmacy I work for; as well as beginnings of memory loss with my older siblings. I myself, at just forty-nine, experience this at times as well.

Your characters are very believeable, as is your dialogue. I can feel Emily's frustration and Katherine's heartache through your vivid description of both ladies.




*Heart*MY FAVORITE PART(S):*Heart*

"I ask, "Are there any rules here? Do I have to remember them?"" Bless Emily's heart for being torn between realizing that her memory is fading, and not understanding what is going on. Its heart-breaking.

"I look up and Katherine smiles, "Thinking of a good memory, Mom?" I look behind me to see who she is talking to. No one is there. My reply, "Have you lost your mother dear?" She smiles again, this time with a little shake in her head. I can see it is one of disappointment, but my mind does not understand." This has to be absolutely heart-wrenching for the children of dementia patients. I was spared this suffering, as were my parents.


*Idea*SUGGESTIONS:*Idea*

● The only suggestion I have is about using a separate paragraph to differentiate which character is speaking when. I have made this mistake in the past, and once I cleaned up my story per the reviewer's suggestion, I found it cleared it up quite nicely. *Smile*

Other than that, perfect spelling, punctuation and grammar. Great job! *Badge*


*Vine1*IN CLOSING*Vine2*

Thank you again for sharing this bittersweet story. It is a blessing that facilities do exist that will be truly kind and not abuse these dear residents. Unfortunately this is not always the case.

I think you are a very good writer,and I hope to read more from you soon. Keep up the good work, & Keep Writing! *Pencil*

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*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
34
34
Review of The Sound  
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
*Flower4* Hi Tom! Thanks for sharing this hilarious story! *Smile**Flower4*


*Reading*OPENING REMARKS*Reading*


Normally I get a little intimidated by such a long story, wondering if I can stay focused for so long. This was no exception - until I started reading it. *Wink*



*Heart*MY FAVORITE PART(S):*Heart*


So many to mention! I can't stop grinning! *Bigsmile*

"In my excitement, I tripped over my red wagon and lost my balance. As I fell, my forehead caught a corner of my metal toy box." The visual of this was quite funny, but a grown man tripping over his toys to find a mysterious "sound," was a riot, lol!

"Along with the usual routine at the emergency room, I was teased over the fact that my tee-shirt had "I'M FEELING LUCKY" written across it in white, bloodstained letters. A cute nurse kept giggling while a grumpy doctor adorned my forehead with six stitches and a huge bandage. "There you go, Lucky," he said when he was done. The nurse laughed." This nearly had ME in stitches...that poor guy, lol!

There are just too many things to quote, but the whole "matches ordeal," and the fact that he knocked a whole in the wall big enough for his head and a hand holding a flashlight had me rolling! "This is really getting on my nerves." This he says AFTER destroying himself and his new home! *Laugh*


*Idea*SUGGESTIONS:*Idea*

None that I could find. Perfect spelling, punctuation and grammar. Great job! *Badge*

I am a little disappointed that we never find out just what the noise was - I was expecting it to be his phone or a smoke detector...something impossibly simple. But then again, it adds to the madness that is this story, so kudos for that! *Stary*

*Vine1*IN CLOSING*Vine2*

Thanks again for sharing this uproariously comical story. I would love to see this as a Short Film, like the ones that they show in between HBO movies as time-fillers. Well done, my friend, well done! *Bigsmile*

I think you are a very good writer,and I hope to read more from you soon. Keep up the good work, & Keep Writing! *Pencil*

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*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
35
35
Review of Shut Up Shut Up  
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: 18+ | (5.0)
*Flower4* Hi Stik! Thanks for sharing this hilarious poem! *Flower4*


*Heart*MY FAVORITE PART(S):*Heart*

● "Shut up, shut up.
We do not really care
about the eye shadow
you chose to wear.
It's not our fault
that it looks like crap."

This is extremely funny to me, as I rarely wear makeup simply because it becomes annoying to me. Don't get me wrong, I know I look much better with it, I just hate having to remember not to rub my eyes, etc.

The old man I'm a caregiver to once told me, "You look so beautiful when you wear makeup. You might just land you a boyfriend!" Yeah well, I'll pass; thank you very much! *Laugh*

I cannot bear women who are so hung up on their appearance. Maybe if they were prettier on the inside, they wouldn't need to look so pretty on the outside to get attention!

The only things worse are women who think they can't live without a man...*shudder*.

I work with one such woman, who was so lonely that she met a man who has numerous health problems and can't work, is rude and obnoxious AND an alcoholic, and moves him in with her. Did I mention abusive and controlling? *Rolleyes* I'll pass...

*Idea*SUGGESTIONS:*Idea*

None that I can find. Perfect grammar, spelling and punctuation. Great job! *Badge*


*Vine1*IN CLOSING*Vine2*

Thanks again for sharing this sassy, brassy poem. These prissy women need to be put in their place! *Bigsmile*

I think you are a very good writer,and I hope to read more from you soon. Keep up the good work, & Keep Writing! *Pencil*

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*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
36
36
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (4.0)

*Flower4* Hi brom21! Thank you for sharing this cute poem! *Flower4*


*Heart*MY FAVORITE PART(S):*Heart*

"Then suddenly, out of his shirt it leapt

In the bullys’ hold would it be no longer kept."

This shows that the story takes a turn for the better - a happy ending. *Smile*



*Idea*SUGGESTIONS:*Idea*

I found a few tweaks that I think will help:

● "My special freind friend" - the title of your poem. A slight typo it seems.

● "Who lived I the pocket of a boys’ boy's ("boys'" implies that there were more than one boy) clothes"

● "Said the bully to the boy who was very timid"

● "In the bullys’ bully's (as last time, "bullys'" implies multiple) hold would it be no longer kept"

● "It hopped into the boy's (implies possession- singular) hands who quickly ran away"


*Vine1*IN CLOSING*Vine2*

Thank you for sharing this sweet children's poem. Please don't let my suggestions discourage you - we all need them to become better writers, and thats what we're here for, right? *Wink*

I think you are a very good writer,and I hope to read more from you soon. Keep up the good work, & Keep Writing! *Pencil*

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*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
37
37
In affiliation with Sisco's Good Deed Group  
Rated: 13+ | N/A (Review only item.)
*Heart* Hi Hooves! Thank you for creating this interesting group. It really beHOOVES me to become a part of it! *Bigsmile* *Heart*

Characters

Since this is a group, normally characters would not apply, but its a movie group, so characters abound!


Storyline

I really liked your account of how your fan-fiction characters fit into a very nice story that others were crazy about.

I believe I could do well at fan-fiction of movies, because I'm always thinking, Man, I would have gone a different route with this scene.



The Hook

MOVIES! Whats not to love?? I am a huge movie fan, but only certain type of movies.

Zombie movies. They are slow and clumsy. How can people not just run rings around them? Its not like the mutants from 28 Days/Weeks Later. Those suckers are FAST! Yeah, thats scary. Otherwise I deplore zombie movies, with one exception: Shaun of the Dead. It is simply hilarious!

Final Thoughts

Thanks again for this group. Its so great as a movie lover, to have a place to go and chat. *Smile*



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38
38
Review of TUPID KEYBORD!!  
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
*Flower4* Hi SandraLynn! Thanks for sharing this delightfully funny story! *Smile* *Flower4*


*Heart*MY FAVORITE PART(S):*Heart*


● " I am free to write once again with the assistance of my new wireless keyboard, ( and all of the letters!) Maybe I'll take a much needed break first?
igned, ndy of undridge ( IGH! I think I'll just go crem now. No one will her me. It will be ilent.)"

This is hilarious, as the narrator thinks they're finally out of the woods, but nope.

This happens all too frequently, and it can drive you to the brink of madness. You really did a great job, not only faking the keys that were not working, (which must have been time-consuming to remember which ones,) but you also made me laugh with the narrator's attempts at staying calm. *Stary*

I actually mistook, "It pin , emphi in pin! I m frutrted nd experted." for "Its pain, emphasis on pain! I'm frustrated and 'I'm frustrated and exerted' but then I figured it out, lol.


*Idea*SUGGESTIONS:*Idea*

None that I could find (at least that I could tell, lol.) Perfect spelling (ironic, no?), punctuation and grammar. Great job! *Badge*




*Vine1*IN CLOSING*Vine2*

Thanks again for sharing this funny, albeit maddening account. I'm not sure if its fiction or not, but if so you summed up the emotions quite well. *Checkg*

I think you are a very good writer,and I hope to read more from you soon. Keep up the good work, & Keep Writing! *Pencil*

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*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
39
39
Review of Why me?  
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (3.5)
*Flower4* Hi Lady Scorpio! Thanks for sharing this interesting story! *Smile* *Flower4*




*Heart*MY FAVORITE PART(S):*Heart*

"The next day I searched them out to give each their bracelet. Instead of being happy they seemed to be embarrassed about it."

This is such a sad situation. Bert just wants to make friends at his new school, and is treated like a pariah.

I suppose the fact that Bert is a boy who gave them bracelets might be misconstrued as him hitting on them, but there is no call for them to act the way that they do. *Stary*


*Idea*SUGGESTIONS:*Idea*

Here are a few tweaks that might be helpful:

● What grade are these kids in/what age are they? Its hard to get a real handle on what the maturity level of the bullies are. I gather from the use of computers to threaten Bert, that they are tweens to tenns, but an age or grade would be useful.

● Basically, the story is too short to give any insight into the characters or their personas. What we know is that Bert is new at his school, hes being bullied, and two out of three of them are girls.

I would love to see where this story can go: it seems as though this is a prologue - a summary for a longer story, and I think that would be great. There is just not enough information to make this a stand-alone story. Theres no plot, character descriptions or ending/resolution. Theres only Bert stating that hes being bullied, the avenue of said bullying, and gender of bullies. The description speaks of brutality; give us some examples of what these bullies have said/done to him.

● "I have asked myself over and over, "Why me . question mark "

● " What have I done to them to deserve such meanness ?" Since this is pretty much repetition of "meanest" in the previous sentence, maybe you could try another word with the same meaning.

Other than that, perfect spelling and grammar. Great job! *Badge*



*Vine1*IN CLOSING*Vine2*

Thanks again for sharing this short little tale. I believe it has potential as a longer story with more detail. If you do decide to expand on it, I would love to read and review it again. *Smile*

I think you are a very good writer,and I hope to read more from you soon. Keep up the good work, & Keep Writing! *Pencil*

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*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
40
40
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (4.5)
*Flower4* Hi Lo! (no pun intended, lol) Thanks for sharing this funny story! *Smile* *Flower4*




*Heart*MY FAVORITE PART(S):*Heart*

There are so many!

*Bulletv* " I couldn't help myself, I danced a little jig. Somewhere between Britney Spears, Riverdance, and William Hung. Let's just say, it was not pretty." This was a funny visual. I can just imagine what the neighbors thought! *Laugh*

*Bulletv* "Umphf! Uh, it went up my nose! Oh!" I rubbed my nose and tried to snuff it out. I'm too lady like to blow a snot rocket, but I was close. "I'm going in!" I said handed Wade my hoe to put away, and ran to the safety of the house and to be rescued by my tissue box." Omigosh, you did NOT just say "snot rocket!" *Laugh* *Laugh*

*Bulletv* "Then as I got undressed, I saw it. Stuck to my bra, socks, and even my underwear, there it was, happily clinging to me like a opossum baby to it's mama."

I loved that analogy. Possums are a Southern thing! *Bigsmile*

I really loved this story, and found myself grinning and giggling while reading it. God definitely has a sense of humor, and it can be found throughout nature (giraffes have long front legs and short back ones,etc. Lol). There are so many things that He has created that are comical - and your cotton wood sounds like its among them.

Your dialogue and characters were very believable, and the storyline flowed very well while telling this adorable story. *Stary*



*Idea*SUGGESTIONS:*Idea*

I found a couple of things that might help:

"Here, let me help you." Wade said coming over and not even trying to hide his merth mirth."

Other than that, perfect grammar and punctuation. Great job! *Badge*


*Vine1*IN CLOSING*Vine2*

Thanks again for sharing this cute, funny story. I'm not certain if its a true account, but it certainly sounds like it. *Checkg*


I think you are a very good writer,and I hope to read more from you soon. Keep up the good work, & Keep Writing! *Pencil*

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*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
41
41
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (5.0)

*Flower4* Hi Gentleman! Welcome to Writing.com! *Smile* *Flower4*



*Heart*MY FAVORITE PART(S):*Heart*

*Burstv* "Green grass is nestled on rolling earth. It grows slowly under the sun, whose light shines on the emerald leaves of oaks and elms. Colorful flowers bloom yellow, red, and more."

I love Spring. It always makes me happy to see the first buttercups (what we call Daffodils here in the South). It puts me in such a great mood when I know that Spring is on its way. Your essay describes it delightfully. *Stary*

I also liked:

"The air grows colder and the winds increase. They come to close a part of the cycle."

It reminds me of what I always say when March winds come, "Its blowin' in Spring." *Smile*


*Idea*SUGGESTIONS:*Idea*

None that I could find. Perfect grammar, spelling and punctuation. Great job! *Badge*


*Vine1*IN CLOSING*Vine2*

Thanks for sharing this cheerful essay. It seemed more poetry than prose to me. You did a wonderful job describing the very essence of this refreshing season. *Checkg*

I think you are a very good writer,and I hope to read more from you soon. Keep up the good work, & Keep Writing! *Pencil*

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*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
42
42
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (4.5)


*Flower4* Hi Incurable Romantic! Thanks for writing this though-provoking article. *Smile* *Flower4*




*Heart*MY FAVORITE PART(S):*Heart*

*Burstv* "She said at one point that it doesn’t matter what I call her, she knows it’s said out of love. But she does love the two special names I chose for her just the same."

This is sweet and sentimental. A very nice touch for an article such as this. *Stary*



*Idea*SUGGESTIONS:*Idea*

My only suggestion would be to break the categories into several paragraphs. Its hard to stay focused on the subject at hand, as well as seeing where dialogue begins and ends. Large chunks of text can be a bit of a strain on the readers' eyes.

Other than that, I found none. Perfect spelling, punctuation and grammar. Great job! *Badge*


*Vine1*IN CLOSING*Vine2*

Thanks again for sharing this advice on romantic letters. I'm sure it will be of great use to couples everywhere. *Checkg*

I think you are a very good writer,and I hope to read more from you soon. Keep up the good work, & Keep Writing! *Pencil*

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*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
43
43
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (5.0)
*Flower4* Hi Ms Kimmie! Thank you for sharing this helpful article. *Smile* *Flower4*




*Heart*MY FAVORITE PART(S):*Heart*

There are so many, I don't know where to begin! This article is the Reader's Digest version of Query Letters For Dummies. With a plethora of useful information and confidence-boosting advice, this makes even scared-silent newbies like me want to use this article as a guideline and get my first query out there! *Stary*



*Idea*SUGGESTIONS:*Idea*

None that I could find. Perfect spelling, punctuation and grammar. Great job! *Badge*


*Vine1*IN CLOSING*Vine2*

Thank you, thank you for sharing this information. Its an inspiration, in my opinion. It will be added to my favorites to be on "speed dial" when I get started on my letters.



I think you are an excellent writer,and I hope to read more from you soon. Keep up the good work, & Keep Writing! *Pencil*

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44
44
In affiliation with WDC Addicts Anonymous  
Rated: E | (5.0)
*Flower4* Hi Elle! Thanks for sharing this refreshing perspective. *Smile* *Flower4*


*Heart*MY FAVORITE PART(S):*Heart*

*Burstv* "A letter should be handwritten. Why? Maybe you don't like your handwriting. If you don't like your voice, does that mean a family member won't want to hear it when you call?"

I never thought of it like that. I am one of those who hates their handwriting. A very clever comparison.*Stary*


*Idea*SUGGESTIONS:*Idea*

None that I could find. Perfect spelling, grammar and punctuation. Great job! *Badge*




*Vine1*IN CLOSING*Vine2*

Thanks again for sharing this essay. You are quite right, the art of letter writing has become a lost one, but a much more personal touch. *Checkg*


I think you are a very good writer,and I hope to read more from you soon. Keep up the good work, & Keep Writing!
*Pencil*


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
45
45
Review of Chasing Ghosts!  
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (5.0)


*Flower4* Hi anne! Thank you for sharing this humorous poem! *Smile* *Flower4*




*Heart*MY FAVORITE PART(S):*Heart*

*Burstv* "I watch you, you know, as you wander about
"SHOW YOURSELF SPIRIT!" I hear you shout
Not likely, I think, no chance of that lady!
I ain't nuts, but I reckon you're a bit crazy" *Laugh*

I really like this poem. Ironically, I am a former Founder and Lead Investigator of a ghost hunting team, so I can imagine them thinking we were crazy, lol. In our defense though, we always asked for their permission to take their photo, etc. Respect was our motto.






*Idea*SUGGESTIONS:*Idea*

None that I could find. Perfect spelling, punctuation and grammar. Great job! *Badge*



*Vine1*IN CLOSING*Vine2*

Thanks again for sharing this poem. It is well-written and quite clever. A very good subject for poetry! *Stary*

I think you are a very good writer,and I hope to read more from you soon. Keep up the good work, & Keep Writing! *Pencil*

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*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
46
46
Review of Our Father's Son  
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (4.0)


*Flower4* Hi Mischelle! Thank you for sharing this touching story. *Smile* *Flower4*




*Heart*MY FAVORITE PART(S):*Heart*

*Burstv**Burstv* "But what happened was not at all what I expected, Methos looked at us both and without a word he walked over to Sasha and gave him a hug. Maybe this won’t end badly after all."

This is a sweet story of a sister's love, for not just one brother, but both. She is determined to bring them together, no matter what.





*Idea*SUGGESTIONS:*Idea*

*Burstv* The only thing I noticed was that it was hard to keep up with the narration change. It jumps from Ocean to Methos, back and forth. Once I re-read it, I got it, but that first run-through was a bit confusing.

Other than that, perfect spelling, punctuation and grammar. Great job!

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*Vine1*IN CLOSING*Vine2*

Thank you for sharing this heart-warming story. It was well-written, and your characters believable. *Checkg*

I think you are a very good writer,and I hope to read more from you soon. Keep up the good work, & Keep Writing! *Pencil*

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*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
47
47
Review of Dessert  
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
*Flower4* Hi Tiger! Thanks for sharing this clever story! *Smile* *Flower4*




*Heart*MY FAVORITE PART(S):*Heart*

*Burstv**Burstv*"No." Melanie muttered, reaching into her pocket. "But the chocolate flavored after-mints could." *Laugh* I love it!!

This story starts out as a typical dental visit, I won't give any spoilers, but it turns out to be anything but! *Wink* Excellent plot twist!*Stary*



*Idea*SUGGESTIONS:*Idea*

None that I could find. Perfect spelling, punctuation and grammar. Great job! *Badge*



*Vine1*IN CLOSING*Vine2*

Thanks again for sharing this wicked little tale. It is well-written and the characters, in this sort of situation, are quite believable. *Checkg*

I think you are a very good writer,and I hope to read more from you soon. Keep up the good work, & Keep Writing! *Pencil*

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*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
48
48
Review of Again  
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (5.0)

*Flower4* Hi Arianna! Thanks for sharing this sad poem! *Sad* *Flower4*




*Heart*MY FAVORITE PART(S):*Heart*


*Burstv**Burstv*"She takes the dog in saying yes, again.
I watch from my window, again.
She sees only the sad puppy dog"

This is the only part I can dissect as a happy point in the very sad poem.

I'm not sure if this situation actually happened to you or someone you know, but its a bittersweet story. The sweet is that the woman truly loves this dog; the bitter is that the dog has temper issues that can, and obviously have, caused harm to others.


*Idea*SUGGESTIONS:*Idea*


None that I could find. Perfect punctuation, spelling and grammar. Great job! *Badge*




*Vine1*IN CLOSING*Vine2*

Thanks again for sharing this sad, but well-written poem. *Checkg*

I think you are a very good writer,and I hope to read more from you soon. Keep up the good work, & Keep Writing! *Pencil*

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*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
49
49
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (5.0)

*Flower4* Hi ruwth! Thanks for sharing this variety of interesting works. *Smile* *Flower4*




*Heart*MY FAVORITE PART(S):*Heart*


As someone who has read and reviewed you before, I look forward to reading more! I saw so many interesting titles, both fiction and non-fiction. They will provide me with some excellent reads and reviews.

For now, I'm reviewing the folder itself, but will return to raid the contents inside. *Stary*




*Idea*SUGGESTIONS:*Idea*

None that I could find. Perfect punctuation, spelling and grammar! Great job! *Badge*




*Vine1*IN CLOSING*Vine2*

Thanks for sharing this goodie-filled folder. I can't wait to delve inside! *Smile*

I think you are a very good writer,and I hope to read more from you soon. Keep up the good work, & Keep Writing! *Pencil*

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*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
50
50
Review of So Far Gone  
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (5.0)

*Flower4* Hi WhoMe! Thanks for sharing this emotional memoir! *Smile**Flower4*




*Heart*MY FAVORITE PART(S):*Heart*

"So I began working out. I was exercising to Billy Blanks Tae-bo DVD’s every day, and then hiking once a week as well. This had gone on for two weeks. I was proud of myself. I was seeing results. I was feeling better and the weight was beginning to disappear, and then it happened again."

I am very familiar with the weight loss rollercoaster. I love to exercise, and can do a decent meal plan when I set my mind to it. At least 3 times in my life I've lost fifty lbs, only to gain it back each time. I have a combination of "I did it! Lets eat!" and "Well fifty is a huge accomplishment & I'm exhausted. I'll take a break..." And like you, I'm sick of medicine- not to mention a "fatty liver" I've got to attend to. *Facepalm*

But it sounds like you're doing it right. Just the lack of pain speaks for that. And next time that SOMETHING comes along, just kick it in the butt and say "Outta my way! I've got work to do!" *Smile*



*Idea*SUGGESTIONS:*Idea*

None that I could find. Perfect punctuation, spelling and grammar. Great job! *Badge*





IN CLOSING

Thanks again for sharing this. Don't you ever let anything keep you from your goals. Sounds like the TaeBo was helping, so maybe rotate days between that and Wii, to utilize muscle confusion, while mixing it up on cardio to keep from plateuing.

I think you are a very good writer,and I hope to read more from you soon. Keep up the good work, & Keep Writing! *Pencil*

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