Anxiety before dawn
|She looks at the clock: 3:13 a.m. |
She falls back on the pillow. What was the problem last night? They wanted to watch football, she wanted to watch a movie. The entire day spent catering to everyone else's wishes. Mom, take me to the soccer game. Mom, why isn't my shirt ironed? Honey, what's for dinner? Then her freelance work; she met four deadlines yesterday. And all she wanted last night was a movie.
She looks at the clock: 3:21 a.m.
That last article she turned in. She may have sounded prejudiced toward blacks. She didn't really mean it that way, but yes, it can be interpreted that way. She will have to call her editor. What time does he come in? 9:00 or 10:00 a.m? What if someone else sees the article? What will they think? She can send an e-mail. She can get up right now and send an e-mail.
She looks at the clock: 3:42 a.m.
No. The editor will understand; he'll catch it and give her a call. What if he is out today? She doesn't know the other editor very well, has only talked to him on the phone. Maybe he is black and will take offense. She'll call and leave a voicemail. No one will be in the office right now, so she'll get his voicemail. But, again, what if he doesn't come in? Does she have the other editor's number? Probably in her rolodex. No. He just started; she doesn't have his card.
She looks at the clock: 3:54 a.m.
What time does the office open? 8:00? Yes, someone will be there at 8:00. She'll call the office, leave a message for her editor and ask for the other editor's phone number. What was his name? Palmer? Ronald? Something like that. Maybe she wrote it down somewhere. Probably on the pad she keeps notes on by her desk. No. Her daughter grabbed it when her boyfriend called. It will be in her room.
She looks at the clock: 4:01 a.m.
OK. Here is the plan. She will get the pad from her daughter when she gets up. She will call the office at 8:00 and leave a voicemail for her regular editor. She will ask for the voicemail of the other editor. What will she say? Don't read it? Send it back? Tear it up? Oops? She will say she may have put a prejudiced slant on something and wants to revise it. No. They will think she is prejudiced. She will say she accidently copied something into it and needs to clean it up and resubmit. No. They will be curious. What exactly did she say in the article?
She looks at the clock: 4:15 a.m.
She gets out of bed, goes to her office, turns on the computer and brings up Sent Mail. The article is not there. She forgot to send it.