Slow Motion into Society

I'm bored and I'm tired. And a little sad. Not at you or at me or life. I'm not sure why. You go to kindergarden and your future is set... until junior high. Then you start being fashioned into this young and successful person. You have all of highschool to be molded and prodded. "Sit down" "Stand up Straight" "Raise your hand" The bolts to a grade A robot. All of a sudden, graduation is here. "What are you doing next?" "You're going to college right?" A new tidal wave of fear sets in. There is no advice of how to love life, love yourself. Shoved into this new parentless world comes the acheivers, the ones who have had their place in the world since birth...Harvard, six figure income, cars, kids, marriage but no divorce. And then there is the rest of us, the failures, the ones who did nothing right. We had sex before marriage. We went out drinking instead of studying our text books. We got jobs after highschool. Regular work, nothing amazing, just something to make money that we can spend on our "getting no where" lifestyle. Tut tut. What have we done? Everyone is so dissapointed. "She could've been someone" "He had so much potential." We aren't dead, we aren't gum on the bottom of your shoe. I went to college right after highschool. It was fun, a 24/7 party. I didn't want to go, but I had to. You'll say "you're 18, do what you want." Just because you're 18 doesn't mean your parent doesn't still rule your world. You want to make them happy. But now, after college, after jobs, after parties... there is life, life I want to enjoy, life I want to take for granted. How? Where do you with out your degree, husband, and money? Why doesn't anyone cater to those who haven't found themselves, have no idea what they want to be when they grow up. Eventually, those dreams will dissappear. I'll sink right in to mother of two and one on the way, venture in the receptionary world, the woman who works for man at home and in the office. Leave that hole in my heart where adventure lay.