This One's For You, Ray

The past is gone
But the memories
Will still and always remain
The guilt that haunts and lingers
Will never fade away

I have fought throughout
All of the ages I can stand
To mention in this mindset
That I am hungry
Hungry for something else

For something deathly
For something unclean
For something unshakable
I will not fade away

But the lust in this
Drives a wicker finger down into my chest
Caving in all comprehension
Implodes the killer inside

The instinct brought forward
By the weeping, the screaming
Internal processes that seep into
Inward sinking feelings, deep
Fighting not to, yet the want

The yearning inside
Crying for end and completion
For eternal rest
A slave to dimensions
To all things in sense

And I am incensed
By you, the guy there
Standing watching me
Always watching me
Holding the knife to turn it
Wanting to kill me

Turn it Mister
Your eyes dare not draw from mine
..The guy there yearns, and shudders
Who screams at the world
Who holds everything inside
Who is not who he should be
Who tries, yet falls to his knees
Who cuts inside, only, on the outside

The guy standing there
The fucked up 'passivist'
The blind, led and starving
Who wants to cut freedom
Inside himself again

..Is me.