something called love

          Something Called Love

Someone had said "Falling in love is easy but staying in love is something special." For me the best thing is keep the past, infused with the present, re-enact romantic moments and stir up hilarious memories.Laugh together, keep your friendship alive. Remember that the test of the relationship is where your love for each other is far more greater than your need for each other.Try to deal with conflicts together, through communications, compromise and compassion .Remember the person you used to be and marvel what you have become ,

What is love ?  It  has a thousand definitions, it can be relative, as it's associated to how we see it,we feel it, we live it, we experience it. We're brought up with different cultures and different families.Love is a facilitator of interpersonal relationship, it is a strong intense emotion,a generic pleasure to interpersonal attraction.

From a biological standpoint, hormones is the culprit.That's where men differ from women. Women release  oxytocin and vasopressin, wants bonding and commitment, while testosteron on men makes them feel ecstatic,then later "love them and leave them" unless they really love them.Dopamine, pheromone, norephenephrene,and serotonin stimulates the pleasure center of the brain and can cause intense excitement similar to a craving such as hunger or thirst or even lust, but is temporary and is unsustainable. I have read somewhere  that it is a cliche " women offer sex for love while men offer love for sex " No self respecting woman would allow this including me .God knows what's best for us and that  special someone comes when least expected.As we grow older these hormones diminish, feelings and desire changes. For motivation men wants to be needed , women wants to be cherished. I wonder has biology crafted humans ,or nature intended us to to be faithful to each other or glad-about sleep-around. I myself is 100% supporter of monogamy.It would have made the world less complicated and maybe longer lasting marriages. One more thing, go easy on alcohol, one night stand can't be undone. It can be problematic.Lighten up! in the end it's still your decision that matters.

From the psychological  basis, love is a cognitive  and social phenomenon. According to a psychologist R Stenberg, there are three love components, INTIMACY(friendship,fascination and romantic love affair) COMMITMENT (expectation that the relationship is permanent ) PASSION( infatuation, sexual attraction , deep heated romance) Sometimes I wonder does opposites really attracts?Maybe in magnets, but people nowadays tend to go out with people similar to themselves, or at least they have something in common. Dating game is the fun part my favorite part, learning about one another.Gone are my  flirting days,( really )I'm just glad I'm  not out there anymore. Remember you are dating a personality but you'll end up marrying  a character.Make time to meet the parents or the family so you can  get the picture. Let love be your guide in choosing a life's mate,but don't rely only on your heart, feelings can be deceitful. Use your wisdom, this one decision will make your life happy or an enduring misery.Sometimes respect is taken for granted, women's liberation maybe, I don't really know.I still believe in tradition.

For me, one thing that love can survive are the words TRUST and FIDELITY,once they're gone it's like a shattered glass, it will never be the same again. Although forgiveness is a virtue, tolerance is relatively up to you .

DollZell

ref: the internet and my not so cerebral idea