it hurts

It hurts,

Counting minutes in vane
Playing with ideas in my mind
Music in the background, for the first time,
With sad lyrics with which I can relate, it hurts

They say there’s a season for everything
Then it must be my worst seasonal condition
Because it hurts to smile or move a muscle
To breathe with no position
To see with no vision
To be with no mission
To love for no reason
It hurts, to feel free trapped in your own prison

I feel this dark cloud confidently standing in my head
Shadowing me around, causing me to fail
At work, causing retrenchment
In my bank account, living me broke
In my poetic affairs, blocking my creativity
In my spirituality, living me hopeless
In my relationships, planting seeds of distance
Then it rains in my soul
With thunderstorms causing emotional disaster and endless complaints
It hurts
It hurts and I feel sick,
My body is catching strange infections like;
Jealousy, unhappiness, worthlessness, senselessness
Impatience, frustration, blame
And the list goes on and on and I can almost taste my death

It hurts

My pain goes deep
Even the world is unable to sleep
If it’s not xenophobic attacks
then it’s someone dying of AIDS
If it’s not a strong woman getting raped
then it’s a promising leader committing suicide
If it’s not political agendas
Then it’s religious warfare‘s
If it’s not my mother finding peace in the truth
Then it’s my cousin moving one step forward and ten steps back

It hurts
Looking at my brothers 4 year old
With his big beautiful eyes, innocent smile and intelligent mind
Having to grow up with a hurt aunt
In a constantly hurting world.