Some Change

Some Change



"Hey lady, do you have any change?!"

"C'mon, Jamie."

"No wait."

"What are you doing?"

"I'm giving him some change. What does it look like?"

"Let's go. He's only going to use it to buy booze or crack or something."

"So? It's freezing cold out here and he lives in a box in an alleyway. What the hell else is he supposed to spend it on, a new Mercedes? Here, dude."

"Thanks, lady!"

"Are you done risking both of our asses now?"

"Done."

"Good. Let's go, then."

"Jeez, Mary, what's your deal?"

"What's my deal?! That guy was a creep, Jam."

"Maybe. I don't really know him."

"You know that no sane person would live like that. He could have robbed us, or worse!"

"He didn't."

"He could have."

"He still didn't. You could rob me, too. You don't."

"I'm not a homeless nut-job sleeping in a dumpster, either."

"You ever hear about the good Samaritan, Mary?"

"Yeah. That Samaritan guy was just as crazy as you."

"It's a good crazy."

"Whatever."

- - -

"Hey lady! Hey, LADY!! Stop! You need to come with me now!"

"Um. I don't think so, mister."

"You don't remember me?"

"No. Should I?"

"Your friend Jammie or som'thin' gave me money on the street last week."

"Jamie. But wait, look. I'm not going anywhere with you, you hear me? Get away, old man!"

"No, lady! Come back! Don't go down there right now! Lady! Lady!!"

- - -

"Here kitty, kitty, kitty."

"Heh heh heh. You're pretty, b****."

"Get away from me!"

"First the money, then we do the thing."

"Be good, and maybe we let you go."

"No! Get back! Help!"

"You can stop spraying that mace in my eyes, now, sweet-thing. I'm immune."

"Ugh. What the hell is that smell, dude?"

"I don't know. Shut the f*** up, man. I'm trying to do business here. You're acting like a f***ing retard."

"S***! There's no need to f***ing hit me!"

"Dude, shut up! Someone's coming."

"F***! Gimmie that purse, b****!"

- - -

"You okay, lady?"

"No. I mean, yeah. They didn't really hurt me any. They got my purse."

"You got off easy. They's bad."

"Yeah. I figured that out. But, um, thanks for trying to warn me."

"I don't mind."

"And, uh, also thanks for coming down here after me, too."

"They's scared little idiots. I knowed they'd run."

"I..."

"S'okay, lady. You better go home now."

- - -

"'scuse me. Could you spare a dollar?"

"Yeah. Wait a second. Here. Stay warm, okay?"

"Mary, what's gotten into you? Last week, you were all like, 'Don't give those homeless jerks any money, they'll just spend it on beer and crackers!'"

"Well, I just, I don't know. I guess I just changed my mind."

"So you're crazy too now, huh?"

"It's a good crazy."