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by Norman
Rated: E · Poetry · Holiday · #2243765
Ahem... the Woodchuck
Oh man, here is that guy again
This happens every year
Hey, I was hibernating here!
Just try this with a bear

He pulled me out of my dark hole
While I was fast asleep
He woke me from a pleasant dream
I feel like I could weep

And there are people all around
There are so many lights
I couldn’t tell you up from down
If it was day or night

What is it with this pesky guy?
This how he gets a thrill?
It’s obvious that he’s a nut
Why does he call me Phil?

And what’s with all the cameras?
I'm not prepared to pose
I haven’t had a chance to brush
Or even blow my nose

You try living underground
It’s hard to look your best
Especially when you’re woken from
A needed winter’s rest

And man, it’s really cold out here
I want my cozy den
Just give me six more weeks inside
And I’ll feel better then

I think I have to move this year
Go someplace far away
Some place where they don’t know of me
Or think of Groundhog Day

That groundhog name is such a slur
I don’t like it a bit
Just call us woodchucks; that’s my choice
And we’ll be done with it

Then Groundhog Day will go away
And you'll see me no more
'Cause I won’t have this pesky guy
Out banging on my door

And we’re not really weathermen
Yeah, who came up with that?
I can’t tell when winter ends
No more than your housecat

So let me get my needed sleep
Just get down off my hill
You’re not welcome any more
... And oh, my name is Bill

Not Phil

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