Hello there! Indelible Ink  here, with review of your work. But, before we begin, let's get the disclaimer out of the way: I am not a highly-trained professional. Actually, I'm not even a somewhat-trained amateur. That being said, however, I am also not of the opinion that you need some special skill-set to explain how - and why - you feel the way you do about something you just read. This is just my opinion, be it right or wrong, and you are free to take as much - or as little - as you'd like from my comments.
My review criteria is pretty straightforward, based upon the premise that I just sat down, opened up a magazine, and came upon your story/article/poem by chance. As a result, at the end of the day, all that really matters - to me - is: Was I interested enough to want to read this piece in its entirety, and why or why not? It's simply the same evaluation criteria I use when watching a movie. When it's over, all I really care about is whether I was entertained or not; I don't really care if the director was trying to convey other messages, or the methods he/she employed when making the film. It's irrelevant to me. Likewise, I didn't spend all day dissecting your piece; my free time is too precious (hence the use of this template), and I'd much rather be writing than reviewing. But seeing how I, too, like some feedback once in a while, it makes sense to concede that reviews are a necessary evil. When someone reviews my stuff, all I care is if they were entertained or not, and - if necessary - where I could stand to improve the piece? That's all I'm doing here. Fair enough? With that in mind, let's commence with the bash-fest (Just kidding)!:
1) Overall Impression: This was a well-written piece that did exactly as advertised: It described the three differing viewpoints of three friends who went camping. I must say I was initially a bit confused by the parallel between the mysterious sounds that the guys heard (diesel truck or bear coming to raid the pantry) and then Justine's revelation of the actual noise source.
2) Best Part(s): You succeeded in portraying three different personalities, which helped make the contrasts plausible. Not as easy as it sounds - to make it look like three different people wrote their own "versions" of an experience.
3) What I Thought Needed Some Help: In the "Author's note" mention is made about the stories concerning "a single event that took place at the campground." I realize that in contrasting three different perspectives there will obviously be different opinions as to what was and wasn't important, but I think it probably would have been beneficial to have actually focused on a "narrower" single event with perhaps less background information around the whole camping experience, if that makes any sense at all.
4) Why I Gave It The Rating I Did: You are clearly a good writer, and I found your descriptions both telling and believable. Your style is easy to read.
5) Suggestion(s): As mentioned earlier, I think perhaps whittling the event down some might have made the contrasts between the three people concerning common events easier to distinguish. On the other hand, maybe I'm just an "unhappy camper" who can't see the forest for the trees! Anyway, take this for whatever it's worth!
Oh, and by the way, this is a
** Image ID #1533819 Unavailable **
I certainly hope this was of some benefit to you. If not, come on over, read one of my items, and rip me a new one! After all: I'm a Rising Freaking Star; I can take it! |
| (4.5)
| (4.0)
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