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Words have no power to impress the mind without the exquisite horror of their reality.
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Hey there, George!
I first want to say that I like the excerpt you wrote. It was great for setting the mood! Since this item has two chapters in it, I'm going to review only the first chapter. I don't mean to rob you of a full review. However, it's difficult to do both in one sitting. If you split them into two separate items, I'd be happy to look at the second one again. 
Chapter One
In addition to the excerpt, I felt the first paragraph was pretty interesting. I like how you delve straightaway into the mind of Lynch by showing through his sentiments on birthdays how he is a dedicated man to his work. Curious as to what it was, I thoroughly enjoyed the detailed descriptions of the antiquity books he was examining. In showing us his dedication, you also managed to bring to light the obsessive nature of Lynch. Admittedly, I was wary when skimming the first chapter at how much monologue he had with himself. However, since you've done a pretty good job at describing his near obsession with his work, I think this gives him a particularly interesting "quirk" to work with. I also appreciate the realism incorporated into the story with companies that exist in our time, such as Microsoft. I felt that this really added to the overall mood and sharpened my interest.
Some mechanical things:
Paragraph One: Relieved to have his fiftieth birthday celebration behind him, he poured a generous amount of brandy into a snifter, took a sip, nodded his approval and headed for the library.  I feel that this sentence is rather lengthly and joins two aspects that don't relate. The use of relieved as an adjective should be followed (usually) with at. In the context of this sentence, it seems as though there should be a words before it. You could do something like: He was relieved to have his fiftieth birthday celebration behind him. At that point you may want to consider ending the sentence there and beginning it with a new one for the rest. If you're concerned with starting the immediate following sentence with he again, you could re-arrange it a little to make it more of an action: Pouring a generous amount of brandy...
Paragraph Two: The usage of the word gleam I think is redundant in this context since the very definition of gleam is "a dim or subdued light" or "a flash or beam of light" as it is in this context. The only reason I feel it's redundant and unnecessary is because you've described the gold glistening (causing to gleam) on the wall in the previous sentence. Furthermore, the sentence it's used in is very long and awkward. Don't get me wrong, I can totally appreciate the fine details you've provided, but I think here it's a little too much. If you take it out entirely, your sentence would read as: Tonight, however, the lights revealed one final reminder of the day, sitting by itself at the end of the long, formal table. This still reads as 22 words though, which is quite lengthy for this type of sentence. Perhaps if you break it up, it might add to the eagerness for the reader to find out what it is: Tonight, however, the lights revealed one final reminder of the day. It sat by itself at the end of the long, formal table.
I really love paragraph three. I think it masterfully describes Lynch's personality and the curled up smile is excellent. I also like how you confirm that it's neither conveying warmth nor gratitude, but you don't exactly tell us why. Mysterious! 
Paragraph Five: I think that you have a good reason for using the ellipses in the dialog here. However, the extra spaces are unnecessary. It should read like: older... and either... 
Paragraph Six: The moment he lifted the cover to see what lay therein the lights above the table flickered and dimmed. Commas are used to separate sentences that are coordinated, such as and/or and dependent conjunctions, such as because/when. In short, this sentence does not need a comma anywhere.
Paragraph Seven: With barely enough light to read, Lynch began turning page after thin-milled, gilt-edged page, puzzled by the fact that the first eight or nine leaves bore no script. This is an excellent refreshment on the character's name, but this sentence is very difficult because of its length and word choice. I adore how you describe the fine edges of the book (and I can relate with my old poetry books), but I think you're attempting to pack too much into one sentence. Maybe you could split it up a little, so that the detailed focus of the pages is in its separate thought. The easiest way is to "spill over" the extra texts in the remaining sentences and join them with the rest. It looks daunting, but I think this would work really well: With barely enough light to read, Lynch began turning the pages of the thin-milled, gilt-edged pages. Puzzled by the fact that the first eight or nine leaves bore no script, curiosity became a major annoyance. As he riffled through the rest, the thought struck him:
Paragraph Nine: There should be a comma after tabletop because you need to clarify the separate clauses. I try to remember this (because I too often make this mistake) by reading everything after and. If it's a complete sentence unto itself then it needs a comma. I would suggest ending the sentence after wood and cut out but entirely.
Great use of the word wherewithal! You rock!
In the following paragraph, I'd cut the dash and just use a comma. 
Paragraph Eleven: Lynch complied with the Lloyd's of London representatives' demands. - I'm not entirely 100% certain on this one, but I'm pretty sure London should be London's in a possessive form, like in: The cat's paw was soft. There's quite a trick in that sentence so you may want to double-check it. Another minor thing I spotted was the usage of fulltime. It is correct at its basic meaning, but I think you might want to hyphenate it. (Also, if you're going to keep the bladder thing in, stick a comma after it. )
Paragraph Twelve: You don't need personal in the first sentence since you've already said it was his staff. Be careful about starting sentences off with and/or/but because these can usually be replaced with however/nonetheless/even so when followed by a comma.
Other skeletons existed in his closet, skeletons whose bones he didn't wish to see rattled about in public. The comma here presents a problem. I think that you've done such a great job in separating the character's voice from yours that this sentence needs a little clarity as well. You could do something like: Other skeletons existed in his closet; bones he did not wish to see rattled about in public.
Paragraph Thirteen: Comma after dining room.
Paragraph Sixteen: Since you use slightly back to back, you may want to consider replacing the second one. I couldn't think of anything handy for the first one off the top of my head, but for the second one faintly popped into my head. *grin*
Paragraph Eighteen: Comma after suddenly. Also, I don't think you need at before any in the last sentence.
Paragraph Nineteen: In the second sentence, I think you can get rid of (gasp!) the second comma after safer.
One thing that really threw me off, and perhaps it's a small oversight, is when he finishes supposedly using the restroom. I found this quite out of the blue since his minor movements were detailed up until this point, and it wasn't mentioned that he was even doing his business. Lynch seems very peculiar, arguably, so I'm unsure if this was done purposefully. I enjoyed reading his thoughts on the collections beforehand; the transition just seemed very strange.
Also, as a minor note, kudos on the proper usage of another language with the appropriate accents on lettering!
Overall, I really enjoyed reading and reviewing this! You have a very stylized form of writing, and I look forward to finishing this as well as reading others that I saw floating around your port. Keep up the great work! 
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Other than those minor fixes, I couldn't spot anything else amiss. Thank you for compiling this wonderful guide! 
However, I do like the build up and suspense. I'm very curious as to what will happen next. 
Her mother was sick, a heart defect had been discovered that affected the strength of the pump in her veins feels awkward. Perhaps try rewording. Her mother was sick with a heart defect that affected the strength of the pump in her veins. - The best way to rewrite is to cut out unecessary words. If there's an actual technical term for this maybe use that instead.