Carly's Ramblings Blog - Style

Gentle Breeze, Youth & Just Say No

30 Day Blogging Challenge

War Chest Wednesday! From a previous challenger...
If you were the wind, what type of wind would you be?

A gentle summer breeze. Refreshing and reassuring on a blisteringly hot day. A reminder that you will not melt and you can survive the day. My breeze soothes and calms the testy nerves the heat and humidity awakens. It reminds us to slow down and appreciate the little things as it mops your brow and alleviates the brashness of the weather. A am always welcome and appreciated.

Blog City – Day 871

Prompt: "Youth is, after all just a moment but it is the moment, the spark that you always carry in your heart." Raisa Gorbachey Do you agree? Write about this.

I would have to agree. The memories of youth are often held dear; looked back on fondly. They tell our story; our beginning. They lay the foundation for where we venture forth. Not all of us have an easy childhood, but whatever happens during our formative years colours our life and points us in a direction of our path. Some wrestle with the ghosts and shadows of their past, they either follow what they have learned or they fight to change their circumstances. Others may come from blessed childhoods and seek to reinvent what they knew from their past. Still others come from favour and fall, lost along the way of life where their youth was hazy due to their own poor choices. It is a moment of our lives that all of us pass through and remember.... those moments are carried in the heart regardless of their pain or poignancy.

Love Louder - Amplifying My Life

I have decided as part of my blog to comment on each of Preston Smiles's ways to Love Louder. He has written an intriguing little book or 33 Ways To Amplify Your Life. The full title is Love Louder: 33 Ways To Amplify Your Life.

Day 23 – Just Say No

"Just because you're not busy doesn't mean you're available."
"If you're doing things that you don't want to do out of a feeling of obligation, then saying yes to someone actually means you're saying no to yourself.... Learning to say no is about setting healthy boundaries, committing to your needs and desires and owning your life."

This does not mean we are being selfish and rude. It's about making a commitment to your own priorities in a way that allows you to put more energy into what's most important in your life. It's about "deciding what matters the most and having the audacity, from a place of love, to unapologetically say no." It is about self care and sanity. It is about stopping overburdening ourselves to things that really don't matter and concentrating on doing those things that will energize and propel us forward in our lives.

Taking the time to explore "what you stand for, what burns deep in your gut, and who you choose to be on a daily basis will serve as you internal compass as you negotiate the world." Just remember, every time you say yes to someone else or to something that you don't truly want to do, you say no to yourself and your priorities."

Preston also writes that it is okay to say no even after you have already said yes. "You can always negotiate your agreements with integrity while finding solutions that work for everyone." He adds that you will only "end up with bitterness if you agree to everything out of obligation or fear.... it's much more powerful to make a decision that feels right in your heart than to follow through with a decision just because you think you should."

#LOVELOUDERCHALLENGE
Three big questions to find your big YES.

1. What most excites you about life?

2. What is one project, person, or activity that you wish you had more time for?

3. When I'm _________. I feel alive and on purpose.

Answer these questions and immediately begin to say no to everything that doesn't align with your answers. The point of this is to stay loving and authentic You are to let go of the need to over explain or defend your decisions.
Possible things to say:
"This doesn't feel right for me at this moment." This is a valid reason.
"Thank you for thinking of me, but because I am committed to ________ I'll have to decline." This allows you to decline while reaffirming you own commitments.
The more you do this... the easier it will become.

I am going to need to think some more about these questions.