Chris' Christian Blog

August 7, 2019

"August 7, 2019" 

It has been at least three weeks since the last time I blogged anything here. To be honest I have sort of gotten out of the habit. I was working for about six weeks and I always left for work really early. I didn't have time to blog. Then I was let go at work due to a medical condition. I have narcolepsy and I went to sleep on the job. I have been battling with sleep ever since. I am going to try to make an effort to be here. I'm at least here today!

Prompt: :If you could only eat one thing for breakfast for the rest of your life, what would you choose?"

I am not a big breakfast person. I usually sleep through breakfast. Breakfast to me is a meal with very few selections. It gets old eating the same thing day after day. I guess I should be grateful to have food but when I sit down and stare at the same foods all the time my gratitude goes away. I am not grateful for the same thing over and over. Breakfast is boring and nauseating. If I had either grits or cocoa wheat for breakfast every morning I might make an exception. I know I would grow tired of them as well though.

August 6 "Prompt: What kinds of things or events give a person a broken, shattered heart?"

I don't know what kinds of things give some people a broken heart. I do know of an event I went through that broke my heart. My wife was sick. I knew she had pneumonia because I was a former emergency medical technician and had heard the sounds enough to recognize it. I begged her to go to the Emergency Room for treatment but she refused. Finally she collapsed. Her heart had stopped due to the build up of dangerous acids from the disease. I began resuscitation and was soon joined by EMS. She was revived but the brain damage was too much. She was in a vegetative state and would never recover or survive without the machines. I was put in a position of carrying out her wishes and letting her die. That broke my heart.

"Prompt: "This is the precept by which I have lived. Prepare for the worst, expect the best and take what comes." Hannah Arendt How do you feel about this quote?"

I try to live each day by a quote I read in Alcoholics Anonymous AKA the Big Book. It says "And acceptance is the answer to all my problems today. When I am disturbed, it is because I find some person, place, thing , or situation - some fact of my life- unacceptable to me, and I can find no serenity until I accept that person, place, thing, or situation, as being exactly the way it is suppose to be at this moment. Nothing, absolutely nothing, happens in God's world by mistake."

It goes on into more detail but you get the idea. I must be willing to accept what is going on in my life as being the will of God. When I do that I don't have to fight it or stress about it because I believe that God's will for me is perfect. I may not understand what is going on. It may seem entirely unreasonable, but if I can accept that it is God's will for me and I trust God, then I don't have to get upset about it. I take it in stride. I have lived by this policy for over ten years. It has served me well. I am a recovered drug addict. I will never be able to put another drug in my body that is not prescribed by a physician, nor will I ever be able to use mind altering substances for fun. I no longer desire to do so. I enjoy being clean today. I love life. I am free from the everyday drudgery I lived with when I was in active addiction. Slavery to anything or any substance is not fun. I know. I lived that way for 37 years. I can easily go back there with one addictive behavior, whether it be compulsive use of drugs, food, sex, or any other behavior. Today I choose how I am going to live. In active addiction that choice was taken from me. If you are addicted, you too can be free. Send me a message and we'll discuss it!