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 |   Reflections and ruminations from a modern day Alice - Life is Wonderland |
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Reflections and ruminations from a modern day Alice - Life is Wonderland  Welcome to the place were I chronicle my own falls down dark holes and adventures chasing white rabbits! Come on In, Take a Bite, You Never Know What You May Find... "Curiouser and curiouser." Alice in Wonderland    |
| 30 Day Blogging Challenge PROMPT November 11th Today, your prompt is one word: Transformation. I feel oddly burned out by the last few prompts...it doesn't help either that I've had to catch up on them all this morning following a busy weekend. None the less, they've somehow all forced me to be more introspective than I am comfortable being at this stage in my life. It has to do with me, and not the prompts of course. I think for this one I will take a different tack and flex some creative writing muscles and give my tender ego a break. The whistle blared suddenly, a shrill sound that cut through the late October air. Elson saw with some dismay that she was the source of the penalty. She had been off sides, again. She wasn't used to playing a forward. She'd been on defense all season and that had suited her just fine. She knew her position well, she moved freely within the confines of her defensive box. It was the last game of the season though and her coach had one remaining chance to claim all her players had scored at least one goal before their run ended. Elson was the one player yet to score and so, reluctantly she was playing well out of her comfort zone as a striker. She had known to expect this. The team had drilled goal kicks with her at last night's practice. They were all working hard to set her up so she could bring it home. It wasn't that she didn't appreciate their efforts, she just didn't see the importance of needing to score. Elson liked playing defense. She was good at it. She knew she had one job, to clear the ball. Most of the time, she connected with a solid kick that would send it soaring back away from the net, back up the field. The attention on her was only focused for as long as it took her to do her job, then the crowd moved on, moved off her and back to the offensive line. Elson did not like being the center of attention for longer than was absolutely necessary. Yet here she was, on the front line. The crowd was intently invested in her every move. She felt out of sorts, pressured in a way she was not at all fond of. She counted down the remaining minutes in her head, hoping the game clock ran out before she would be passed the soccer ball again. Then, it happened. Jacob got the ball and everyone was shouting for her to "get up with him" as he moved it up the field toward the goal. Elson drove her long legs forward, closing ground and coming alongside Jacob. There was no one around them and the goalie looked anxious.Elson shouted for him to shoot. In answer, he looked at her and passed the soccer ball directly to her, right in front of the goal. He smiled and said, "Here you go Elson!" It was lined up perfectly. Elson barely registered the screaming crowd over the sudden thunder in her ears. She saw her coach and team on the sidelines, jumping up and waving their arms frantically at her. She felt the sun on her back and her skin felt oddly hot and prickly. Elson closed her eyes and kicked as hard as she could. She felt the toe of her cleat connect and opened her eyes in time to watch her goal kick soar over the goalie's head and into the net. The sideline erupted with hoots and screams. The coach called her and Jacob off the field and the team met them with hugs and cheers. Elson turned to thank Jacob who was celebrating his beautiful assist with a wide, proud smile. She had not anticipated how good it would feel to score. It transformed her in the moment, took her from the backdrop and out into the light. She welcomed the attention this time, basking in the look of pride on her mom's and Dad's faces. It had taken all season but she had gotten the moment she had not know she'd wanted, and she for just this once, she was happy to claim it. |
| 30 Day Blogging Challenge PROMPT November 10th What do you find yourself insecure about? Are you able to overcome your insecurities? If so, how? Before the last six months of my life, I would have said I was most insecure about my body...or more accurately, my weight. I have struggled with it on and off for most of my adult life. I have trouble sticking to regimented diets and instead try to focus on healthy lifestyle choices instead. Lately though, my weight has slipped pretty low on the "things I feel insecure about" totem pole. I find myself second guessing just about everything I do, especially at work. I struggle to find the confidence I once had. I know it goes hand and hand with something that happened, some deceit I accidentally uncovered...but it's opened a much bigger can of worms for me. I'm having issues with this prompt even...I feel like its only adding to my anxiety this morning. I'm certain I will eventually overcome my insecurities, I have to force a confrontation first and then I can rebuild hopefully. I'm just struggling with finding my way just now. |
| 30 Day Blogging Challenge PROMPT November 9th Write a stream of conscious entry starting with the words “I wish...” Once again I am catching up...but I'm determined for myself to check off each day on this challenge. I need to develop some discipline as a writer so this challenge affords me a chance to work on that. I wish that it wasn't already Monday. I do not feel as if the weekend provided adequate down time enough to prepare me for this week. I'm not ready for the departmental meeting Tuesday morning, nor the PTO meeting on Wed evening, or the family dinner with my husband's family on Thursday. This morning I ordered a large coffee. It is only 9:50am and I only have two fingers of cold coffee remaining. It is not enough to get me through this day. I have this lovely secretary. She is an older lady, a real sweetie but she likes to talk to herself, narrate her tasks and read me joint emails before I have a chance to open and read them for myself. She is reliable and always willing to help so I get upset with myself for having so little patience with her quirks sometimes. I am just someone used to working alone I guess. I've been at this job now for over two decades...twenty-two years. I was kid when I started, literally. Now I am old and jaded...not really but I am dealing with a bit of career crisis and there is a large confrontation brewing that I have tried to stave off with busy work. It makes me anxious though. I know I have to bite the bullet and say my piece soon, I'm slowly gearing up and fortifying myself I guess. I think I do much better writing to a prompt. These days my conscience seems overtaxed and distracted. This lame attempt isn't helping me to feel better unfortunately so I think I will just stop here. |
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