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The place to be for positive reinforcements! |
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Hello My Sunny Pals, Welcome back to Shellyville.... ** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only ** |
| Hello Sunshine, Well my attempt at self-care hasn't been noticed. It seems as if my attention to myself is at an all time low. I think I do a good job of taking care of myself but when my stress is up, my tears come down. I guess I am not suppose to be overwhelmed. Stressed out. Worried? I am not suppose to be mad at the school for not educating my son? I am not suppose to be mad that I have no control over this problem? I am not suppose to be upset that my son is losing his edge. Well guess what? I am pissed! I am tired of being a strong willed crazy person. I am tired of seeing this self-destruction take over my life. If I can't vent the reality why would I hide my feelings? I used to live in a fantasy world. I would hide behind the walls of Shellyville and pretend that everything was perfect. I never let on that I was upset or disappointed. I was the perfect wife. I am not her anymore! I don't live in Shellyville. I am not perfect and I am sure as hell not Married!! I can handle this but at what cost? I am slowly and without a doubt losing my edge. I see it passing me by. I see the mistakes I make clear as day. No amount of fantasy and good looking is going to deter me from reality. I am living it. Love, Michelle |
| Hello Sunshine, I suppose I should be flattered. I suppose my heart will mend and I will get over the flush of excitement. I will recover some kind of dignity. When I have no idea! His breath across my soul. His spark inside my walls. He lights hallways that have been empty for years. He is like a ghost that resides in my attic. Haunting me with what-ifs and old love. I am blessed. Love, Michelle |
| Hello Sunshine, An early morning here with the sun peaking through the whisper thin clouds. Light comes earlier now but still the biter cold. Up early to take Savanna to school on an empty tank of gas! One of these days I will be proactive and get gas when it's the middle of the day and not below freezing! I am already overwhelmed with my work day and it hasn't even started. Trying to be and do three things at once is not fun! No going back to put my head under the covers! I am up and will accomplish all I set out to do. I am good with that! Love, Michelle |
| Hello my sunny pals, Last night I went to see the movie Monumental Men. It was awesome and inspired some incredible dreams. I am living in art. I am a piece of creative color. My form and statue still being worked by the hands of a genius. I hope I never loss sight of the importance of creative writing and living! Thank you for those that did their part. Never let evil win! Love, Michelle |
| Hello Sunshine, SO I have this new black shade in my bedroom and it's AWESOME! I slept like a little baby! I did wake a few times like normal but I was able to roll over and fall back asleep! I feel like a new woman today! Nice!! I wish everything could be fixed by a magic curtain. Imagine how simple problems would become! I might wish myself out of a career. You know the one I am waiting to start! This week is a lazy week. I don't have enough clients. I don't have enough to do to keep me busy and it's driving me crazy! I need to work. I need to be making money and not spending it! One day at a time! Love, Michelle |
| Hello Sunshine, So it just occurred to me that being different is good. It means I am not like everyone else and neither are YOU! It means I can be funny when I need too laugh. It means my heart can wish and grow. I am not going backwards. My life is moving forward and now is the time to see that happening. My days are moving so fast. I see patterns dancing on my wall. I am unable to sleep anymore! Tonight Matt is coming over to help me put up room darkening shades. I can't wait. I think it will help. I hope it does. I need to sleep. I need to be able to shut my mind off. The voices so loud. Love, Michelle |
| Hello Sunshine, In an odd way the eye can reflect the distance the heart has traveled. Tears run easy when hurt. Savanna is taking pictures today of her eye with her camera on her phone. She is amazing. In her reflection we see specks of color and fibers that swim in perfect harmony. It's interesting to see how one color blends into the next and yet some colors like yellow and gold stand alone. Perhaps life is a perfect example of that. We stand as individuals yet swim in the same pool. I love watching the Olympics and thinking how small our world has become! It's a great day to love. Love, Michelle |
| Hello Sunshine, It is amazing to me that time moves on. Words are written and forgotten. I put away years of writing in an attic. I walked away from a life. Now seven years pass. I picked up the pen again. I wrote a new chapter. I found a new love inside. In the reflection of my soul I have always been a writer. I have been a dark poet. I have used words to escape. I am still doing it. It's who I am and what makes me tick. I picked up my journal this morning and started writing. I won't forget that I am important. I wont ever put my pen down again. I am a writer with words locked inside. Stories not told but holding on for that day when they can be released. It's a great day to celebrate words! I love you! Michelle |
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