%%USERNAME%%    %%ACCWORDS%% %%ONOFF%% |
 |  This is my blog & my hope, writing daily will help me see my progress and log supporters. |
| ........ |
| Please...try not to be envious...LOL. I wake up around 9.00 am, wash my face, brush my teeth and head to the restaurant for breakfast. I then head to the Big C at Jungceylon Shopping Centre, which is about a twenty-minute walk away from my hotel (Grand Mercure, Patong). I wander the aisles looking for anything that looks tasty and nutritious (there is so much variety here it is unbelievable). I usually grab some fresh fruit, iced coffee, fresh milk and any sweets that catch my eye. I was expecting the heat to be a problem, but coming from Queensland, it is much of a muchness to me, and by the time I get back from my walk I unload my groceries, change into swimmers and hit the pool. I spend half an hour cooling off, sometimes having conversations with the entities who are always there if I close my eyes and focus (who can hear my thoughts, which saves me from looking like a madman talking to myself...which I may very well be). They are fading with each day that passes and on the whole, I endeavour to ignore them for my own sanity to prevail. I eat enough at breakfast so lunch is not much more than a mandarin, some dried mango and salted caramel macadamia nuts, along with some coconut water. By around 3.00 pm, I take a nap for an hour or two before waking up and watching YouTube videos for a while. My favs atm are videos of UFOs and MMA fights. I then decide if I will venture out for dinner or order room service. Food prices on the streets are ridiculously cheap and are of good quality. Last night I ventured out to Bangla Road (the red light district) for the second time. I bought a local beer from 7-11 (for B79, which is around AU$3) and walked around smiling at the crazy nightlife and people who frequent this place. Before I left Australia, I thought I might employ a Thai girlfriend for a week or two. It's been almost eight years since I have been intimate with a female, and in my mind, I thought I deserved to have this experience, after all, it is an honest exchange for a service I thought I would want. Funny how things become perceptual once you are exposed to the reality of what you think you want. I have nothing against the girls, who I'm sure work hard to earn a living and send a lot of the money to their families back in the villages they come from. But once I had walked through Banglar Road, I knew this was something I could never do. I'm no moralist or do-gooder, and I judge no one who decides to go down that path (neither the client nor the worker). It just isn't something I could bring myself to do. After waiting so long, the idea of what I want...which is to make love to another human being and not just fuck someone who only cares about how much money I pay them, I knew in that moment I will wait until God brings me to her, or her to me. And at my age (in six months, I will be sixty years old), if it never happens, I have far more important priorities anyway. Since arriving in Thailand, I've walked countless miles exploring the streets. On one particular night, I made a wrong turn and as the lights dimmed and less traffic passed me by, I ended up in the middle of nowhere. I stumbled upon a bar and tired beyond belief, asked for a taxi. No one spoke English, but I managed to convey to a guy (thank God for Google Maps) my hotel and he took me on the back of his motorbike back to the hotel. I was so relieved that the B100 trip we negotiated, I paid him double the amount. My legs are tired and my knee hurts...but my soul feels like it hasn't felt in years. Clean and yearning to do good for others, and not the self-gratifying life I left behind in Australia. I needed to leave...if I hadn't, I would still be using and closer to death than I am right now. I am not afraid of dying (every time I climb on the back of a motorcycle here is taking a risk...but also a lesson on how to negotiate the traffic once I buy my own motorcycle to explore SE Asia). I am in no hurry, and to die under circumstances not to do with drugs will be an honour I will have no regrets about. |
View Portfolio
Visit Notebook
Send Gift Points
Awards
Badges
Send Email
Community Newsfeed
General Discussion
Sponsored Items
Book of Trinkets
Static Items
Books
Groups
Interactive Stories
Audio
Campfire Creatives
Community Notes
Crossword Puzzles
Documents
Folders
Images
In & Outs
Madlibs
Photo Albums
Polls
Product Reviews
Quizzes
Survey Forms
Web Pages
Word Searches
