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 |    Online journal capturing the moment and the memory of moments. A meadow meditation. |
   L'aura del campo 'é a lua, é a lua, na quintana dos mortos' ♣ Federico García Lorca ♣  L'aura del campo. A breeze in the meadow. So it began the last day of Spring, 2005; on the 16th day of the month of Light of the year 162. This is a supplement to my daily journal written to a friend, my muse; notes I do not share. Here I will share what the breeze has whispered to me. PLEASE LEAVE COMMENTS! I L  V COMMENTS!On a practical note, in answer to your questions: IN MEMORIUM VerySara  passed away November 12, 2005 Please visit her port to read her poems and her writings. More suggested links:  These pictures rotate.   Kåre  Enga~ until everything was rainbow, rainbow, rainbow! And I let the fish go. ~ Elizabeth Bishop, The Fish |
| Where is ... ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ ... HOME? Where do your cultural roots run the deepest? Where is your family’s ancestral home? Do you feel most connected to the place you grew up, where you live now, or somewhere else? Quick answer: 1. From family: Sweden. From where I grew up: Germany and Ireland. From being American: England. 2. Ancestors came from Småland (Sweden), Alsace (along the Rhine), a rootlet to Kerry (Ireland), England (Probably Midlands). But DNA also was Slavic, Italo-Greek, Iberian, Finnic ... and practically no German/French. So... who knows. Folks got around. 3. Grew up in the Rust Belt. Went to school and lived in the Plains, now live between mountains in the NW of USA. 4. Feel connected to Norway and Portugal. Love Taiwan and Serbia/Kosovo and Japan. That was the quick answer... my thoughts... I was self-raised with some Japanese concepts. It was interesting being there and understanding but not knowing how to explain it to Americans. I did like Japan, but living there isn't so easy. Like North Carolina, a Yankee is someone who visits, a damn Yankee is someone who refuses to leave. My Swedish roots are part of the melange of growing up. It wasn't that we were "Swedish" but small attitudes were definitely handed down. Like: we'll frown at you for 5 years but if we can't scare you off you're one of us. I've visited Sweden and could live in Göteborg but prolly not where my family came from. They left for a reason!  There's still nothing there. The German influenced my speech. I supposedly have a Wisconsin accent. Go figure, I've never spent a night there. And although I'm disorganized I like to have some organization around me... sometimes. German travelers were ab-fab wonderful. Germans in German? Not. And I'm allergic to the German-American superiority complex. Irish must've affected my ears. I can understand the Irish better than the English. I understand some aspects of the musical culture and story-telling and... well, I have more English heritage but it was too bland or too puritanical. No fun. My English friends though gave me the very best vacation of my life in 2011. In the USA I'm drawn back to the plains. The mountains here are lovely but I feel closed in; I want an open horizon. And I found the people of Kansas/Nebraska/Oklahoma to be warmer. I won't go back to where I grew up although I do think the region was lovely. I just don't feel safe there. Increasingly I don't feel safe here. So where would I go? Outside of the USA I found Norway and Taiwan to be emotionally safe. Taiwanese are friendly. Norwegians are pleasant but closed. Kosovars and Serbians are warm and passionate. And it's cheap there. Costa Rica? I've lived there twice and the culture of lies and bureaucratic disorganization drives me nuts. Which leaves me in Portugal. I'd move there for a few months if they'd let me. Madonna lives there but she bought her residency. I don't have money. Still, visiting and living in a place isn't the same thing. Would I feel safe (yes)? Would I be connected (eu só posso falar um pouco de português)? Could I afford it (maybe)? Could I afford to travel from there (Oslo would be better). Is it tolerant? Yes. Is it multi-cultural? To an extent. I know this has been a long answer, but it's not an easy question for me. My world isn't black/white; it's rainbow colored. But go home? NO. Stay? Maybe. Move back to Kansas? In my dreams. Go live in Europe? That would be very very nice.  Flash fiction:
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