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Review #3922524
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Review by Solivagus
In affiliation with Merry Misfits of WDC  
Rated: | (3.5)
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*Writing* Billy Wigglestick's *Writing*
*Leaf1**Leaf2* Sonnet Contest Review! *Leaf2**Leaf1*

*Staro**Starbl**Staro*
3 *Bullet* 10 *Bullet* 1
Schemed Quatrains *Bullet* Iambic Beats *Bullet* Rhyming Couplet


*Check3* Note from Billy *Down*
Note about judging: this is a very subjective contest. You may not agree with me.

*Mustachel**Mustacher*
*Pointright*Your Group!*Pointleft*
*Down**Down**Down*
Round #1:
1. "Invalid Item"  - Invalid Review
2. "Invalid Item"  - Invalid Review
3. "Invalid Entry"  - Review of "Poetry Form and Structure Study"
4. "A Story, A Poem and An Image" 
5. "Invalid Item" *Pointleft* This is you!


*Check3* Billy Likes:
*Bulletg*Creativity: Using the state of a secret garden in nature was a wonderfully creative metaphor for the state of a young woman. Women, to me, are most beautiful when they are forest pools of self-sustaining serenity.
*Bulletg*Use of Form: The peripeteia was evident and well executed.
*Bulletg*Word Choice:
*Bulletg*Overall Impression:

*Checkr* Billy Hates:
*Bulletr*Stumbling Points: You have a few lines of 11 beats and a one of 9 beats, this can cause the reader to stumble a bit even though there is nothing but longer/shorter syllable lines getting in the way.
*Bulletr*Lack of a Peripeteia:
*Bulletr*Poor Flow: My darling girl. Though this poem does flow well, it is not in scansion to a traditional english sonnet. A sonnet is typically in iambic pentameter - which are five pairs of soft strong beats. In here we see the fluid ups and downs of a flowing poem - but one that is not iambic pentameter. I wish to differentiate because this is not a criticism on the piece, but on the way the piece applies to form. On it's own, it flows beautifully, but it doesn't match the scansion of a sonnet. Does that make sense?
*Bulletr*Forced Rhymes:

Thank you for joining me on this wacky ride through sonnet land. I hope to see you again, keep an eye out for the round ending email.


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
   *CheckG* You responded to this review 11/12/2013 @ 11:33am EST
Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/my_feedback/action/view/id/3922524