In the fourth line of the second line, the "too" should be simple "to", and the same thing in line 2 of stanza 4. This is a fantastic poem, and I am able to relate to the problems you are describing which I believe to be very important when writing a poem. The reader can feel as you do and relate.
I completely agree with you on needing winter to come and chase away the heat. The last stanza was my favorite! Especially the "winter walks/A sweet embrace".
I really enjoyed reading this poem. I liked the last stanza especially, with the simile comparing Autumn to a cowboy in a rodeo; Wonderful! The imagery was very descriptive and sharp so I was able to visualize the craziness of the wind as it tried to knock off Autumn. The title was well chosen, too!
This poem was very good, genuine and honest through and through. I can feel the emotions behind the writing, and I see very clearly how this person feels as others practically tell him to get over it. Watch the line breaks, though, and make sure you don't break the line in the middle of a thought, or at least make sure it is at a good point. For example, towards the beginning (lines 7 and 8), I would recommend not breaking those two lines up and instead keep it as a sentence "but tender emotions that I refuse to show". Other than that, this poem was beautifully written!
This poem was so beautifully written. The imagery you used was stunning! I could visualize everything you were saying almost perfectly. I love your idea of writing from a male point of view, and I think knowing that you are a woman writing this made it kind of funny but did not lessen the intensity of the poem and the emotion. Beautiful!
I loved this poem! It had a lot of feeling and emotion. A few things I would change, though, are in line 2 when you said "our being our best..." I would take out the first "our" and leave it just as "being our best". Also, the last line of the 4th stanza when you said "how could I've known", I would actually type out "I have" because it seems to flow better that way. Great poem otherwise!!!!!
Good imagery in this poem! Watch your grammar, though. In line 2 you said "for perfect shapes..." but I think you meant "form", and in line three you forgot a space between "bold" and "and". Then I would also add the article "a" before "life" in the second half of line 3
I loved this poem!!!! I especially loved how you went through it as if each stanza were a different part in the timeline. The only thing that I would work on is the rhyming, there were one or two times that the words didn't seem to flow as well as they could because you were trying to tie in another rhyme. Very good poem though! Very emotional
I liked this poem a lot and felt the emotions behind it, but there were a few awkward sentences that I am not sure if you did on purpose or not; I would consider rewording them even if you did. One of those sentences was line 8 which starts with "Now any of what was there..." and I think you forgot a "we" in line 11 which starts with "and when wake up to reality..". Other than that, it was beautiful!
This was a great story!!!!!! And I always love happy endings! You must have put a lot of time into researching the names of some of those mythical creatures.
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