Well done, Lexi Joy. I understand ADD, I think more people have it that can realize what it really is and what it does. Thank you for sharing this with us. You might want to capitalize the first word of each sentence and put puncuation at the end of the sentences. Other than that, your poem works for me. Writeon! Ramblin' Rose
This is a wonderful story you have written Star Kaat. Thank you for sharing. I think this wondrous piece will be quite at home in my upcoming-Wednsday, issue of the Fantasy Newsletter. Life going on around the tree of life. Write on! Ramblin' Rose
Was John finally able to retrieve the boys? Did John get swallowed up into the corn field as well? What happened? You left us dangling, like in an Alfred Hitchcock movie. Paul, you've written a really good segment, will you turn it into a whole story. I'll bet you would do a great job. Write on! Ramblin' Rose
Very good and well written Marilyn. I think you have captured "The Green Man" at nearly his best. Thank you for sharing. This piece is a wonderful example of how The Green Man works his magic on the land. I will be featuring your piece in my next newsletter. October 11th is the due date. Ramblin' Rose
This is a nicely written poem Diana. I really like the way it is worded and written with much emotion. A person could almost experience you feelings. You might want to add more puncuation to help the poem read better. Thank you for sharing. Write on! Ramblin' Rose
Yes it is probably what your victims would have hoped and prayed for. Great horror/scary short story Philsoft. I hadn't thought the piece would have ended in that fashion. Thank you for sharing this with our readers. Write on! Ramblin' Rose
This looks like a great story prelude of more to come or finish to what went on before to Bestiarii and/or Sagittarius. I did find a couple places where a word was left out. Up in the first sentence (ed) was not added to (picked). Then in first sentence of the second paragraph (to) needs to be between (time and fight.) Thank you for sharing. Write on! Ramblin' Rose
What a wonderful idea Hedoren Yua for the creation of a brand new world. Aside from the difficult to pronounce new words it is an interesting story. It must be wonderful to be content and at peace. The peasents are happy and safe from the existing harm. Thank you for sharing this enjoyable story. Write on! Ramblin' Rose
This is a very nice poem Roses. I like the way it reads. In reading the piece nowhere did I stutter or stumble. You have made it rhyme very well. Thank you for sharing. You might want to add some punctuation marks so that a reader will know better where the sentences end. Ramblin' Rose
Wonderful story. In the second paragraph you mmight have the ghost floating across the floor instead of (u} flying . For a minute there I thought you might write that the pies were caused by everyone dancing the Monster Mash. Terrible nasty Zombie pie with Mummy dust. It could happen! I will be featuring this story in my next Fantasy Newsletter. It will be out in late July. Ramblin' Rose
Well, for one thing you have to finish this story. You've left me hanging. I wan to see the rest of the show. I need to know if they make it to a hospital, or drive off into a ditch or hit a truck-train-bus-cow whatever! She can't die now anyway. The heroine is not supposed to die. What happened to Darron? he has to live too so she can chew him out one more time. You're leaving me on pins and needles. This is deffinately a 5 plus rated story, but we all want to enjoy the the rest of the story Ramblin' Rose
Well said Elaine, You did a wonderful job of informing readers of these things need to get read. If you don't mind I am going to feature this article in my port for more people to read. I seem to have a following of teen girls and I'm sure they would appreciate the information. Write on! Ramblin' Rose
My oh my, what a great start to a possibly wonderful horror story. Thank you for sharing. You've got a good story line going, write on. You might subscribe to the Horror Newsletter for hints and ideas on how to further this adventure in **********. :-0 Ramblin' Rose
A wonderful story indeed but where are the banshees? In enjoying your story I missed them somewhere along the line, unless they are symbolic. This is a great piece of writing. Write on. Ramblin' Rose
This is a wonderful story Purple Kitten. I did find a couple of small errors though. The animal deer is different from Dear Sir. In the next paragragh your finger slipped and didn't get the (b) in about and your other finger added a (t) to enough. These things happen all the time. I somtimes do it myself. I usually have to read and re-read my work to get all of the mistakes fixed. Sometimes I still miss some. Please edit your story one more time because I would like to feature it in my next edition of the Fantasy Newsletter. Thank you, Ramblin' Rose ~~Image #6000 Sharing Restricted~~
This looks like a fantastic idea. I do have to print this page for further study. I don't quite understand all it is trying to tell me. Keep up the good work. :) I am dyslexic and it takes a little while longer to understand many things. Write on.
Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/profile/reviews/sjking
All Writing.Com images are copyrighted and may not be copied / modified in any way. All other brand names & trademarks are owned by their respective companies.
Generated in 0.25 seconds at 8:48am on May 10, 2024 via server web2.
View Portfolio
Visit Notebook
Send Gift Points
Awards
Badges
Send Email
Community Newsfeed
General Discussion
Sponsored Items
Book of Trinkets
Static Items
Books
Groups
Interactive Stories
Audio
Campfire Creatives
Community Notes
Crossword Puzzles
Documents
Folders
Images
In & Outs
Madlibs
Photo Albums
Polls
Product Reviews
Quizzes
Survey Forms
Web Pages
Word Searches
Ramblin' Rose 
I hadn't thought the piece would have ended in that fashion. Thank you for sharing this with our readers. Write on! Ramblin' Rose