Thurs, 9/6/7
Memo: Author to Author:
Hi Howler, how you doing?
Found: DOLVO SECURITIES CH 2 on AR (Auto Rewards) and am simply flabbergasted by what plot/ genre you proceed to undertake.
My rev has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Go Noticed"
Dolvo Securities is undersiege from unknown terroristic assailants.
Revving, another descriptive, believable, realistic adventure/ thriller chapter from this author before was adequately recieved.
So glad to see that in Howler's portfolio this is indeed an ongoing prolific novel enfolding before all of W.C and our welcome guests.
Note, this month creativity rains supreme upon our souls.
Alas, dear author it is with a heavy heart that included in this five-star grade comes a few superficial re-edits.
Of course, when these fit and if you wish to correct same, that is a given thus entirely up to you. Sure every writer loves the edit point correctamundo side of any rev.
Howler, darlin
From shorthand notes, a picnic table in NC beneath torrential rain from my beach umbrella to yours also giving in chonological order reader reaction from April Sunday "TEFF'S MERIT BADGES"
CHRONO ORDER:
Opening line: "What have we got?" Torrance yells. ==== Perfect automatically says present tense action.
walking thru fifth floor corriders .... my my a huge building ..... from Teff
others plural == chickens. Do you see where I mean? ... par. 1 typo
OF: DOLVO uniforms -- yes this provides visual, OCEANS 11 comes to mind ... even better ...
Using uniforms --- Shows very good attribute in details of plot as now bad guys blend with crowds.
Difficult as an author to attempt crowds of this proportion ... So HOWLER'S a daring author.
Of: use of IED === realistic in popular newspapers and blogs, puts readers feet on the ground.
Of: "IED" is action, right away in second paragraph thus continues the novel from Chapter ONE! Achievement no snag --- ten plus star, allright?
had formulated (?) When Howler uses "within seconds" Suggest fomulates
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SIDEBAR: HARCOURT REF: -- an author, any author may use past tense for past perfect.
Plus here's an observation about when we actually draft a chapter for the first time. Tendancy to use past tense as the paragraph that gee whiz a minute ago(?) got written is no argument for "within seconds." Or one may insult the reader for not knowing it happened merely a few seconds ago ... which is silly. lllllllllllllllllllllllllllll
Reverse sentence to: Shouting into her headset ...
Mary's quote -- you say ... "Mary said in Spanish ..."
Stop!
Teff observation on writing well. Here, even if one calls a Spanish teacher, don't be a snob. Or later ask someone to write this quote for you in de Espanol. This adds authenticity while pleasing mucho readers, amigo.
had been === was === prior to 9-11
Of: SEPT IIth === Use it if any tie-in comes your way ... court publishers the entire time you write, dear, dear, Howler.
Howler, novelist to novelist ... when you seek a novelist's break .. try or retry Lawrence Sanders of TENTH COMMANDEMENT fame. Yes, Sanders, a Brooklyn, marine tackled a similar plot to DOLVO SECURITIES in his first novel: "THE ANDERSON TAPES" tapes (1970). Of course all gifted revvers reading PRP already are aware, no doubt (hee hee)
THE ANDERSON TAPES plot follows the robbery of a luxury apartment building. Also a grand master of sentence frags is Lawrence Sanders. Makes me want to go to the library myself and rent one of over thrity novels by this famous author.
So, if publication is your bag .. have the world of fun with this one, dear novelist.
Stay the course.
Cordially:
** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **
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{cc:blue} On spot rev, gotta run, shrimp boat's landed. Wink!
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