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 |   By biggest challenge- My life. Wanna know me? |
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** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only ** This is just a flow of words from my fingers. I just jot down the words that come to my mind. This might have many grammatical, punctuation and other errors, please help me correct those if you find any.   Thank you kiyasama for the lovely banner! Please read these two entries if you are new to my blog:"Invalid Entry"  "Invalid Entry"
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| I'm trying to blend two blog prompts into one today. Why was I born? I don't know, seriously. Maybe I was born to fulfill the wishes of my parents and family. Maybe I was born to enjoy life in my own way. Overall, I was born because Allah wanted me to be born. I had a huge row with my employer today. Which made me question myself: How should I manage sudden temper? I try to manage temper the same way I manage pain. Just either through music, or through writing. Currently, I'm practicing in music school for the program on December 16th, our Victory day. On this day, back in 1971, we became independent from being a part of Pakistan, after nine months of War, blood and crime. Hope I will perform well with my group. ** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only ** |
| I always adore handmade things. So, when I was a kid, back in the mid 90's, I used to buy clay toys. There's one special type of mud used to make toys and other kitchen utensils. My most favorite toys were those clay toys which used to be available everywhere. There were dolls, animals, even Bengali kitchen sets made out of clay. Even now, we can sometimes get those at a much higher price at certain chain super malls. We could get these at only 2 taka per piece, so back then, getting pleasure for kids was not so tough. I also loved the fabric dolls my sister used to sew for me. Of course, I had those cute porcelain or plastic dolls, but they did not appeal to me much. Now, when I go shopping, I buy Barbie dolls for my niece. I also buy traditional fabric dolls of various themes and patterns, after all, my inner child wants to go back to my favorite toys all the time. |
| I remember writing down my thoughts since I was a baby. Those scribbles turned to school assignments as I grew older, and now, finally, I can publish. I think being an avid reader is a nice way to start if one wants to be a writer someday. |
| That's one thing I like doing, caring for others. Especially when I'm in pain, I love to bring a smile to someone else's face. That makes me smile too. There's a dog I have to pass every day, while going to office. It remains well all throughout the year, but becomes sick in winter. Wish I could take it out to a vet, but can't, since it doesn't have a real owner, and we don't have a vet nearby. It's like our area's pet now. We all take care of it. Sometimes, I notice wild flowers in the park, being smashed or torn by the walkers. Wish I could protect Allah's miniature creations in some way. There are many children, in our low income group, who cannot even think about proper meals thrice a day, forget education and other rights. Wish I could do something for them. Everyone remains hungry for love all the time, in some way. So if I had the chance to give a gift to anyone, It would be definitely love and care, in any way I can. |
| I'm always surprised to be alive. Every single day is new, and each day teaches me something new. For instance, I had a hectic day at office today, but met a lot of new people, and had lots of fun as well. Every day I go to bed with the prayer that I might remain strong against any of the odds that can come my way, and every day I wake up with the promise to be a good girl, to win hearts through my behavior. Surprised at self discovery. Every time I write a new word, I exclaim: "Can I really write?" Bedtime now Have a good day all! |
| Pride, Greed and Jealousy kills a person from the inside. So, am I really proud of myself? No. There are certain things I don't regret at all. For example, during annual sports days at school, I could never take part.Instead, I used to take part in singing or painting competitions. I used to be so sad, because I wanted to run in the races, or maybe take part in other activities which required physical involvement. But running was a daring dream for someone who couldn't even walk properly at that time. I still have to use a stick to walk, and maybe will continue to do so all throughout my life. As a result, I used to sink into colors and music. Hobbies became addictions over time. Then when I learnt to write, I could pour my heart on paper. I'm happy that I'm addicted to creativity. I even have a few drug addicted friends, but creativity will keep me away from those, in-sha-Allah . I searched for a meaning of life all the time. My family used to say, I was born to tie them all up in a single thread. I've been trying to do that ever since. My family has taught me to respect everyone, because if you truely love someone, you will be loved back. Maybe because of all the teachings, now the blue collar employees who work under me have become my brothers or aunts. Maybe that is the reason why I'm never scared when I go into my employer's room. He was a teacher since my early teens, now he's a two in one, both an employer and a teacher, with whom I can even share my lunch. I have an elder brother from a different religion as my boss. What more could I ask for? I'd never regret taking a job at my current office. Overall, as I always say, I am proud to be a Muslim woman. I'm religious, but not a bigot. I am proud of all my roles in my family. A daughter, a sister, a sister-in-law, and an aunt. Who said that to love a child, one had to be a mother? I've brought up all three of my brother's children, who are like my own. I'm proud to be in a joint family, and happy to know the value of relationships. I'm glad to be a female. To some people, female might be the weaker gender. Maybe, males can go out and conquer the world, but dear boys, at the end of the day, you have to come back to us girls. Maybe to rant, maybe for a little comfort, or maybe you like to be cared for. I always say one thing to everyone, you want me to be a shade for you, you'll get me. But if you begin to play with my emotions? I'll throw you out of my life, forever! |
| Falling in love is my biggest regret. I am a one man woman, and always wanted just one man in my heart. Unfortunately, that will never happen now. I always wanted someone who'd come to me all by himself, I never proposed to anyone till now. This certain Mr. N, came and proposed to me. He was a classmate, we studied together at university. I did not want to respond positively at first, knowing that a completely physically fit person might not accept me, as I'm challenged since birth. Somehow, I was encouraged to say yes, as my heart wanted to say yes to the first person who came to me. Within a very short time, I realized that he just wanted my body, not me as a person. I would never give myself to anyone before marriage, so I strongly said no. Also, I told him to come to my family and ask for my hand if he really wanted me. Since then, we were having ups and downs in our relationship. We'd break up, and then get back together again. I just kept on giving him chances. He wanted to lure me into a physical relationship, but I'd never do something against my values. I'd have to die someday, and face Allah. This November, he called again, and asked me to marry him. I'd have to convince my parents and family within the first week of December to get us married. He wanted me to stay in my family even after marriage, and he'd take me to his family 4 years later, after completing university. If his family did accept me, all right. Otherwise, he'd just seperate from his family. When I asked for a social proposal, through parents, and a proper engagement, he went: "You have absolutely nothing but a walking stick. My society would never accept you." My thing is, why on earth did you come to me? I didn't call you! I've always dreamt of a family filled with warmth, in-laws and relationships. In my family, I'm always pampered, loved in every way. I wanted the same thing to be repeated after marriage. I, therefore, had to say a strong "No", and disconnect with him completely. If only I could go back to my early teens, I could have accepted one of the friends who had a crush on me. Then, probably, my view of men would change. Men are very good as friends, men can be sweet as brothers, but love? All men are, sorry to say, nothing but animals who can hardly look beyond a female body. I'd never fall in love again, NEVER EVER. Even if that means staying single for my whole life! |
| There are a lot of things which are very dear to me, so it's not so easy to pick just one. First of all, comes my published items, and the papers containing them. I've been writing since 1997, and have collected all the newspapers and magazines which published some of my scribbles. There are some tabloids called the "Observer Magazine", a weekend tabloid published from Bangladesh Observer, one of the oldest English newspapers of Bangladesh. Unfortunately, this paper is not printed anymore. Then comes another tabloid called "Rising Stars", the teen section of a leading English daily, The Daily Star. My first published piece was a Bangla poem, I had won a contest of poem completion, the first four lines were given, and the contestants were asked to complete it with 4 to 8 lines. That kobita still resides well in the magazine it was written for. There are other Bangla magazines with my creations in it. Now, every single issue of Youth Wave, the magazine I work for, is priceless to me. Writing there doesn't pay much, but I write for the love of writing. I have my office to support me financially. The other prized possessions are my harmonium and my keyboards, they give me energy when I'm down. There's nothing like melody when I'm depressed. The third dear belonging is a little doll that my real doll, my little niece, gave me when she left for the USA. I can see them almost everyday through skype, but that truely doesn't quench my thirst of holding her close. ** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only ** |
| I'd love to go back to the time of Anne Frank, just to learn about her time in hiding, and to give her company. Anne Frank's diary is so motivating. She's someone I'd love to know personally. I'd love to read the stories she wrote back then. I'd like to know the people she lived with, and the hard times she had gone through. ** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only ** |
| I would love to go back to the age of 12, a time when I first learnt most of the things I know now. Back then, I used to wear frocks, and I would look good in everything I wear. I would have two little ponytails hanging on either side of my head, a hairstyle I really miss nowadays. I would often use my skipping rope, something that can't be used now. I would spend hours in the school library, immersed in thick volumes of classic novels. Now, I'm building up my own library at home. If I was to be on a deserted island for a few days, I would take my favorite novel, Jane Eyre. The character Jane always inspires me to fight with life. I would also take either my keyboard or my harmonium, just to forget sorrow with music. I'd also take a little pot to cook something to eat. There must be fruits on the trees, I can at least make something. I'd take either a kitten or a puppy, just for company. Moreover, I need someone to fondle at times, so pets might serve that purpose. Last but not the least, I'd take an English version of the Holy Quran with me. Despite being a muslim, I still can't read Arabic, shame on me! Love, Humming Bird |
| I don't really know who loves me or who likes me. I know my family loves me because they are my dear ones. I always try to treat people with respect or love because come on, who doesn't like to be respected? And of course, none will respect you if you don't respect them. "Don't change for people to like you, be yourself, and the right people will love you!" Try to find out the simple pleasures of life, so that you can enjoy your life even without anyone else around. For example, today I could leave office one hour earlier to attend music class. My boss appreciates music, so he didn't object. I could sing my heart out without any voice crack, even after returning home. Then when I looked on my bed, there was a lovely Kashmiri Shawl waiting for me. Had a lot of fun with my Turkish student today. I gave her jumbled senences, and she did them correctly all by herself with just a little help. What more could I ask for? Thanks to Allah! ** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only ** |
| I love days filled with work and creativity. After all, an idle mind is the devil's workshop, so I prefer not to be idle. Had a lot of work to do today. Handling clients and students, managing the library, joking with my co workers. There was a staff meeting scheduled today, but it had to be called off, thanks to a very busy boss. Thanks to Allah I had my job to keep myself occupied. And also, thanks to Allah I had Youth Wave, the magazine I work for. Because of my sub-editor, I always have an urge to write. Someone who's addicted to writing knows what I mean. Writer's block seems like being in real hell. Friday is my only off day. Friday also means spending time with my musical instruments and going to music class. It's almost the end of the month, and I'm not so strong financially now, otherwise I'd also go shopping or to a resturant with my sisters. The most enjoyable part of my job is meeting new people almost everyday, and making new relations. Humans are social, and if one is respected and loved in her own society, it can be really motivating. Another pending work is the nano. Only did just 11'187 words, Have to write a lot now. See you all later. Love, Falguni |
| Well, maybe, there were a number of mistakes I had made in the past, maybe there were people very hard to forgive. But over the last couple of days, I had forgiven a few who had hurt me in many ways. Believe me, it feels really good. Thanks to Allah I had the ability to forgive. Maybe Allah has taken away my ability to walk properly, but that doesn't mean I have come to this world empty handed. There are many people who think I can't be part of their society because of my walking stick. There are many people who try to use me. Thanks to Allah for keeping me on the right paths instead of the wrong ones. I'm thankful to be born as a Muslim, and am proud of being a muslim woman. In my country, women are either addressed as "Sister" or Aunt, or even mother, depending on their age. Glad I can be the sister of so many men, glad I can be like a shade for people asking for care. Glad I'm a woman who loves to spread love all around herself. In the rural areas of Bangladesh, still many girls seldom go beyond primary education. Glad my parents enrolled me in English Medium schools since childhood. Glad I have proper education. Sometimes it's so hard to express myself verbally. Glad I could write. Music soothes my ears and my soul. Glad I fell in love with music since childhood. There are many other things to be thankful for. But most importantly, I'm glad I'm alive, as yesterday is history, tomorrow is mystrey, and today is a gift. Love you all. Falguni |
| Skydiving? No thanks, I'm afraid of heights! ** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only ** Check out
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| We celebrated Eid -Ul Azha yesterday. To me, Eid means dressing up in new clothes, a little bit of comparatively brighter shade of lipstick, as I don't like any other makeup. Jewelry, loads of good food, God, I'm still eating! I've penned down half of a story yesterday, plan to complete, edit and post it within today. I also enjoy my time in the WDC chat room, and of course, reviewing. I'm not an excellent reviewer, still I like expressing my opinion on written work. In this Eid, we sacrifice animals to satisfy Allah. According to Islam, one day, one of our beloved prophets recieved a message from Allah, the prophet was asked to sacrifice something he loves most, for Allah. The prophet agreed, and prepared to sacrifice his only son. Just before the sacrifice, Allah sent a lamb, and told the prophet to sacrifice that instead. From then onwards, we sacrifice cattle to remember that day. The meat obtained from the animal has to be divided in three equal parts. One for the poor, one for relatives, and the last part for the owner of the animal. It can either be a goat, or an ox. By chance, if a pregnant cow is sacrificed, that sacrifice is not accepted. This year, we sacrified an ox, sharing with one of our relatives. It was a goat last year. Normally, an ox costs more than a goat, and if a big ox is bought, it can be shared within two or three families. The cattle has to be purchased from temporary cattle markets set up for Eid Ul Azha, and we have to hire a professional butcher for the slaughtering. The butcher charges a particular price for every thousand of the cattle's price. For example, if an ox costs 50000 taka, and a butcher charges 50 taka for every thousand, he gets 2500 taka as his charge. And if the owner wishes, he can give the butcher a portion of the meat kept for the poor. I hate writer's block. Thank God I had this blog, at least I can type away whatever comes to my mind. |
I'm really into reviewing these days. Don't know if I'm good at it or not, but I do try to help the writers as much as I can. To be honest, sometimes I get so inspired by an article or story, my fingers begin to scribble automatically. I have a five day long vacation. We'll be celebrating Eid-Ul-Azha, the second largest religious festival for the muslims, tomorrow. On this day, we sacrifice animals, cattle to be precise, to satisfy Allah. I plan to write at least the rough drafts of 5 stories in these five days. Then I'll polish them for Youth Wave, the magazine I work for. Everyday, I try to complete at least one WDC target. That way, I can be more active in here I think. I just adore WDC. I have re-opened my raffle "Invalid Item" . Hope I'll be able to sell my target number of tickets soon. I'm also a reviewer at the Moderator Review Blitz, hosted by Brooklyn  . This activity runs till the 31st of October. Go check it out, you'll not be disappointed!I do have a number of plots circulating in my brain, hope to pen them down soon! ** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only ** |
| Beauty actually lies in perception. I try to see beauty everywhere I go. In the face of a newborn, in a friend's warm smile, or maybe sometimes I pick up my pen just to inspire myself. It can be anything and everything. Nothing particular! |
| I'm really into fruits, namely, juices. I love everything, especially the summer fruits, mangoes, pineapples, litchis, litchis are like one of the most delicate, delicious, and expensive natural treats available here. Unfortunately, litchis don't last on the trees for more than two months, it disappears from the markets even before. sigh! I also like eggs, and milky foods. A nicely done poached egg is almost a must for me at breakfast. I love eating soft, lukewarm egg puddings quite often made at home, especially with kids around. Just as a treat for my taste buds, I sometimes pick up a bar of Cadbury Dairy Milk chocolate from a shopping mall nearby. French fries are also my favorites. Though I eat these in moderation. I don't like biscuits much, but a thin cracker seems appealing at times. I'm not really into food, but whenever I get those "hunger calls", I can munch on anything and everything to satisfy it. Thus, I can admit, I am a little overweight. |
| My concentration is affected mainly by too much of outside noise, or maybe extremely loud music. God, I really don't like it when there's a wedding going on nearby. Weddings mean band parties, who love to produce ear crushing noise they prefer to call music. Normally, I can do my best whenever I'm really into something. Its always will power that matters, and if I really love doing something, for example writing, nothing can actually come my way, whatever it be.  |
| Follow me- was an interesting challenge for me. First of all, it gave me an opportunity to interact with people I did not know before. Also, it took me away from writer's block. On the other hand, I don't know much about the structured formats, as I'm a new participant. I had a lot of fun reading the other entries. Blogging gave me an opportunity to share a bit of myself with my friends here. Luckily, most of the participants were people I did not know before, glad to make new friends through this. The follow me prompts also gave me an opportunity to rant, to share some of my inner feelings and thoughts about everyday issues. I'm not so expressive verbally, and for me, writing is one sort of communication that helps me to express myself. Hope to have a lot of fun in the upcoming months. I'll accept any sort of format. |
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