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Every so often I have a thought or two, I might as well write them here...they may be political thoughts (I hate war, polluters and thieves), or thoughts about American culture (which I wished we really had) or even religious thoughts (I don't play favorites)...but you're invited to see these thoughts of mine right here. Comments are welcome... |
| This whole Michael Vick thing makes my heart hurt. Here's a guy who thinks it proper to raise dogs to kill other dogs, and he used pitbulls for the purpose. Pitbulls got a bad name already, they seem to get loose and attack children, other dogs, in fact anything that moves. So to train these kinds of dogs to kill other dogs is a bad thing. That being said, to then kill these pitbulls because they were too kind and wouldn't kill other dogs is even worse. I won't even get into the betting like certain brainless, heartless types do (Michail Vick and his friends) thereby losing substantial quantities of money. I want to talk about something else, something I learned at an early age. And that is, if you're going to kill an animal you better (by God) eat it. It doesn't matter to me near as much if Michael Vick and his friends kill pitbulls, if they then barbecue, roast, deep-fat fry, jerk or otherwise take care of the meat. To just kill things without eathing them is plain wrong. I know there are folks out there who believe if someone mistreats animals then they are likely to mistreat other folks as well. Vick wasn't charged with mistreating his girlfriends (or at least as yet), but I'd have some words with some young and stupid girl finding herself in the midst of Vick and his entourage. These people are fucked up!! Run don't walk to the nearest bus stop!! And, no, I don't think it right to eat people that you've killed...that's pretty much a no-no in most cultures (if not all). Oddly enough, the folks who might think it okay to eat humans would also not hesitate to ead dogs. Okay, Vick ain't getting off even if he claimed he et the dogs after torturing and killing them. But it would at least be some claim to socially redeeming value (though the vegans might disagree). Michael, in the future if you feel the need to kill things, the least you can do afterwards is eat them. Otherwise your kharma sucks. |
| Dysfunction Junction A friend of mine was recently analyzing all the relationships he’s had with women over the course of his life and he realized they all had one thing in common; every relationship had been dysfunctional. Taking it one step further, he figures if he’s attracted to a woman walking down the street it’s because he knows somehow she’s dysfunctional, in fact the dysfunctionality (to invent a word) is the prime attractant. So in the interest of science we compiled a list of things about the afore-said woman walking down the street that might be a set of keys to get his nose in the air: 1. She’s wearing a funny hat. Either one with an extra long brim, a big floppy hat woven from her own dog’s hair or dryer lint, or else one of those close-fitting, brimless hats made famous by the “flappers” back in the “Roaring Twenties.” 2. She’s got a strange tattoo that she shows off with her fashion choices. 3. She’s got at least an inch-and-a-half of silver bracelets on one arm or both. 4. She’s wearing boots of some kind, usually the kind that laces up, but she’s not above wearing cowboy boots or knee-high moccasins made of cow-elk belly hide. 5. She probably has too many piercings, more than two earrings per ear is a sign of dysfunctionality. 6. The chances are that’s not her real hair coloring. These are just a few of the signs, but plenty enough to ask her out, at which time you begin to see or find out other sure clues, such as: 1. She has dietary restrictions, usually related to meat. 2. She has more than two cats, or dogs, or both. 3. She prides herself on her spirituality and often makes decisions based on some arcane practice, and if you want to make points you’ll have to do the same. 4. She’s obsessed with her health, doing things to either make herself the healthiest woman on the planet or to destroy herself by using mass quantities of someone else’s cocaine, liquor, etc. But, lest you think I’m sexist, I’ve thought about the signs showing men are dysfunctional too, for the benefit of the women in the group, things to look out for: 1. The guy’s name is Jimmy, or Bobby, or even more telling, Bobby Jim, Jim Bob, Squinky, Squishy, in short, any childish nickname or kid name which has stuck with this loser into his adult life. 2. He has a pickup raised way up high off the ground, with mud-flaps showing chromed naked women in profile. 3. A tattoo with someone’s name, like Cheryl, even though she was someone he had a weekender with, or worse yet with “Mother” surrounded by hearts and cupid arrows. Beware of the guys with tears tattooed close to his eyes, a sure sign of jail time, and the guy who has beer preference tattoos. 4. Nascar bumper-stickers, decals praising his shifter or carburetor, Confederate flag stickers, any truck-window art for the NRA, the Marine Corps, Ducks Unlimited or other signs dedicated to killing things and/or beer. 5. A wife-beater tank-top with a beer logo or a t-shirt that says "If you can read this, the bitch fell off." And if that attracts you women, the next step where you can learn even more about this moron would be: 1. Going to MacDonalds for dinner. 2. A date at the bowling alley. 3. Taking a half-rack of cheap beer for a romantic drive, which culminates at some obscure clear-cut landing (for those uninitiated a landing is up in the woods and represents the place the logs are dragged to after being trees for the greater part of their lives). 4. A guy who requires you to buy a motorcycle helmet so you can ride behind him. 5. No dietary restrictions as long as it has meat in it. 6. A spiritual vacuum. See? We’re both sexes faced with dysfunction. Unfortunately this isn’t one of those cases like where beautiful people are attracted to each other and live happily ever after, no, quite the contrary, this is one of those situations we end up learning from (unless we’re stupid). But the really unfortunate outcome of all these dysfunctional people and/or relationships is we get snake-bit and can’t seem to avoid them after awhile. Sure we try to know, sure we try to learn, sure we look for better choices, but the bottom line is the really together people already are married and in good relationships. Which leaves the rest of us casting about for potluck, and remember this salient point, sometimes it’s better to leave what’s leftover from what we brought to the single’s potluck party so we can sneak away when our nemesis is in the bathroom. Hey! We can learn, can’t we? Unless we’re doomed to making the same mistakes over and over. Jeeze! It’s a jungle out there! |
| The Great Corn War I have disturbing news from the heartland, America, corn has become the next oil. I just traveled from Western Oregon to South Idaho as I do every two years or so for a family reunion, and this always gives me an opportunity to go through a lot of farmland. In the past those crops were variable, onions, potatoes, sugar beets, pinto beans, wheat, alfalfa, with occasional other grains, corn, oats and barley. What did all those traditional crops have in common? They were either food or feed. In Western Oregon the corn grown is mostly for canneries, or eating on the cob, this variety is known as sweet corn and is what you get in the grocery. Over in Eastern Oregon and Idaho, if corn is grown it is going to be feed corn, as it is called in some places, with the option to munch it all up earlier as another form of feed, namely silage, or let it dry in the field and then harvest corn kernels. But to cut to the chase, so to speak, this road-trip showed me a disturbing trend. Every spot of farmland available is sown to corn. I hardly saw potatoes, fields that used to be dedicated to sugar beets sprout waist-high corn. The familiar huge round plots of alfalfa (they are watered by sprinkler systems that rotate) are now corn circles. The disturbing trend as I see it? All this corn being grown is for industrial use, to be made into bio-fuels, bio-diesel from the harvested dry corn, with the ensuing vegetation converted to bio-ethanol. Corn is no longer a food or feed product, it is the new oil, and the price is going up all the time. So we’re looking at a new set of barons, instead of wearing turbans, these guys have hats that read John Deere across the front, but they’re still going to squeeze us just as badly as does OPEC. How, you ask? It’s simple, food doesn’t pay, fuel does, and as much as our dear farmers want us all to believe they are only in it to feed America, this land of plenty, they are going to sell us down the river for cold hard petro-dollars. With the result that food prices are going to go through the roof, since land has been converted from food production to fuel production. Sometime in the future you’re going to go into a fancy restaurant and see, right there on the menu, some of the ramifications we’re going to face because of this corn-founded development: Corn on the cob, ten dollars an ear. Eating corn will become a luxury. In fact, finding anything to eat at all will be a luxury. Corn-fed beef? Sold by the karat. Popping corn? Through the roof. Want some corn squeezin’s? Get drunk on high test. The world as we’ve grown accustomed to it is coming to an end. Believe me, this is nothing to laugh about. I bet before all the carbon-based emissions clear, laws will be drawn up to force farmers to grow food again, they may even have to call in the National Guard to enforce these laws. My only hope is that all the voters don’t starve to death before they enforce their will over the Agri-lobbies’ influence. We’re entering a new phase of battle, America, soon obesity will no longer be an issue, thanks to what I predict will be known throughout history as “The Great Corn War.” |
| Now there is a great hue and cry to support our soldiers who have suffered hugely from this Iraqi mis-adventure, Walter Reed and it’s aftercare is at the forefront. I wonder if all the folks who’ve put ribbons of “Support our troops” on their SUV’s are concerned that the troops are so unsupported by the same man these same citizens voted for, namely George W. Bush. There is a Teflon quality our President has assumed, which may have worked for Ronald Reagan, but doesn’t seem to be working for Dubya. Where does the buck stop? Who is responsible, ultimately, for giving these ‘heroes’ the care they deserve for their efforts? The generals are falling by the wayside, in droves, and yet they are only symptomatic of a larger disease, namely the current administration’s propping up of a failed system. Our president recently traveled to South America, claiming that he has a plan for their poor people. What a joke, they’d be better served by the socialistic aims of the Venezuelan president, he actually does something for his poor. Dubya, on the other hand, tries in our country to create more poor people, ostensibly to provide services for the rich folks he is really supporting…we are looking at a sad time, my fellow citizens, a disruption of the middle class, a strongly interdicted creation of a servant class, and worse yet a degradation of our environment. If I were a poor person in South America I’d ask our precious Dubya to go away. Everything he’s touched in the United States has turned to shit. There isn’t one thing he’s done successfully, the environment is in a shambles, the war he’s waged is in tatters, he has no clue where his ‘Pearl Harbor’ attacker (Bin Laden) has gone. He is a failure, unless you are a very rich person. When he finally retires to Crawford, Texas, he’ll take his place among those very rich, the folks who have benefited from his largess will be very grateful to him. He’s a made man. How many of us, the rest of the country he supposedly has lead, can make the same claim? A pitiful, but very rich minority. Oh yes, don’t forget the Chinese, who have bankrolled our adventures in Iraq and will soon call in their markers. We’ve fucked ourselves, my fellow Americans, by supporting a nincompoop. Listen to the ranting or our Vice President, listen to the dingbats of the Republican party who want to succeed Dubya…and then listen to the folks who lost limbs and mental abilities in Iraq. How many of us have been left behind? It is a majority, supplemented by the soldiers who are being screwed and will be screwed further, denied their benefits…What should you expect from a man who was born with a silver spoon up his nose? A president who never held an honest job, who ran from war? A man whose moral values make it okay to destroy countries on the basis of trumped up and false intelligence, a man who puts money before Jesus’ teachings, and hides behind a flag he didn’t have the courage to defend. It’s worse than Vietnam, far worse. Accept the future, my fellow Americans, a future you voted for when you re-elected Dubya, a future where we are reduced to being a third-world country…it will get worse for us, like global warming, it is a process we can’t stop…get out there and find more ribbons to put on your SUV, put your faith in stupidity, until 2008 we have saddled ourselves…let’s hope when the smoke clears we still have anything to ride… |
| Some personal history I don’t want folks to think I’m some kind of nut case, some kind of anti-religious nut case. I came upon my beliefs (or non-beliefs, as the case may be) honestly. I was raised in the church. Every Sunday and more besides. My parents totally believed, as had their parents, ad infinitum. I read the Bible all the way through, cover to cover, and at a time that I understood what I was reading. When I was about fourteen I was unmitigated hell on Sunday School teachers, that year we went through any number of them, most of them quitting because of me and my organizing the rest of my group. I knew the scriptures and I used them unmercifully. I wouldn’t stand for hypocrisy. I still don’t. Finally we had a retired lieutenant-colonel from the Air Force who wouldn’t put up with my tried-and-true methods of disruption of the Sunday School. He maintained you must take things unproven in my reality by faith. In effect I should believe what I couldn’t see or pragmatically prove. I couldn’t go there, I still can’t. There’s no one who can explain why God seems to listen to some while disregarding the prayers of others. My own belief is that God doesn’t exist except as a construct of human hope, there is nothing anyone can say, anything that is written that can dissuade me from my belief or lack of belief. Jesus set a very high bar in terms of behavior toward others. A bar worthy of emulating. My problem has been and always will be with those who claim to believe in Jesus while hypocritically acting in ways Jesus would abhor (according to what I’ve read in the Bible). I don’t believe in God, heaven, the Holy Ghost, the Trinity, the Virgin Mary, or any of it. I do believe that if we treat others as Christ would have us do, we’ll be blameless in that holy court of opinion. Jesus set the bar way up there, it takes a special person to love their enemies, to turn the other cheek. Few Christians have ever been able to do it, do it now, or will do it in the future. Even though I don’t believe and likely never will, I know what it takes to be a believer. Which takes me back to hypocrisy, to Pharisees preaching, like Falwell, Robertson, even Billy Graham, on the corner. How do you treat others? Can you love people who are unlovable? Or do you put your faith on display, as if going to church was the same as following the hard reality Jesus taught you to follow? I don’t care what you do. I know what I must do and it doesn’t follow any church’s guidelines. None of the things I do are done to grant me a mansion in heaven, I have no agenda. I don’t believe in God, I don’t think he listens to prayers, it doesn’t matter, what happens on this earth will happen anyway. You may be dismayed by my last blog entry, I can’t change that and I don’t care. Your relationship with your god is your own. If you believe in Jesus and follow his teaching you will be a good person, claiming to be a Christian is not enough. It’s a hard row to hoe. If you can do it I’ll respect you, if you’re a hypocrite I’ll not. If Bush were a real Christian he wouldn’t have made the enemies he’s made. A real Christian doesn’t make enemies. Where do you stand? God doesn’t take part in our lives, he doesn’t change one thing. If God is real to you he’ll change your life, and your life will reflect that. Even if I don’t believe in God, I believe that. If there is a Hell it is manifested on this earth by the way we treat others, do we pollute our planet and make life miserable for those living here? Then we’ve created Hell. If we kill others then we kill heaven, if we take advantage of others we create Hell. Where do you stand? Even if I don’t believe God has anything to do with our lives I believe in the Golden Rule, in fact I live it, regardless of heaven or hell. I don’t need your respect for what I believe, I don’t need God. I have self-respect and as long as I treat others with respect I can live with myself. I don’t care what you believe, I can only hope you can live a life worthy of your own self-respect. But if you claim to be a Christian, be aware I know what that means, if you don’t follow Christ’s teachings you have no right to that claim. Where do you stand? |
| I've lived a long time and heard many folks praise god for answering their prayers..."We wouldn't have survived the twenty-five car pileup if God hadn't answered our prayers" "My son would have died in the bombing in Iraq if God hadn't answered my prayer to keep him safe" Get out of here!! For every prayer god answers keeping your specific loved one safe he ignores a number of others and their loved ones die. That's a truth you can't deny, despite your faith. Does that mean your prayer is somehow more important or blessed to His Holy ears? I doubt it, it just means you were the benefit of luck that has nothing to do with God and that luck could easily turn on you, like Lot's luck, and leave you destitute. God is no respector of your desires or your prayers. People who totally believe in God's grace and goodness will die no matter how much they prayed, were they somehow tainted? Bad people and God punished them? No. Too much luck, good or bad, is based on prayer. Prayer has nothing to do with it, worthy people will suffer, those not worthy will be saved. Is that the benefit of prayer? You're foolish to think so, and perhaps that's the key. Foolish people believe in God's protection, bless their hearts, God could care less. For every prayer he supposedly answers there are many more he ignores. God isn't watching the sparrow and he doesn't watch you and your loved ones. How long will people believe that God is omnipotent and controlling our reality? He's not controlling anything, yet there's untold number of folks who believe they're blessed by his watchfulness. At the same time there are any number of folks who have deserved, totally, his grace, and are denied it. How can anyone account for his denying the widow her husband, the mother her soldier son, the tragedies invoked upon the god-fearing? God doesn't protect anybody. Grant him all the power you want, he won't be there. If you pray and come through hardship successfully it isn't because God took a hand in your protection, you were just lucky. And remember this, luck comes, like coins, with two sides, this time your luck was good...God didn't flip the coin. There's no valid proof in God's existence. It's only superstition. There's no proof of heaven, no proof of hell. If you're a Christian, a Hindu, a Buddhist, a Muslim, a Jew, all your beliefs are based on no real structure of fact, it is only your belief that makes it real to you. God's ability to ignore your prayers is every bit as strong as your belief he will. Just let me point out one small item, which is backed up by any histories you'd like to read. More people have been killed by God's believers than any disease, any patriotic war, or natural catastrophe. Belief in your God, whoever you are or believe in, has resulted in incredible amounts of death and bloodshed. It doesn't matter what you believe or which god you believe in, you are more likely to kill folks who don't share your belief, even if your God is a God of love (Christians are historically some of the worst)... Perhaps free will comes into the equation here. If God exists he supposedly gave us the free will to follow his teachings (no matter what your religion)...we have the free will to either kill those who don't share our beliefs or not to kill them, the free will to pray for salvation or pray for victory, the free will to be good people capable of loving others or hang our enemies from trees. But the bottom line is that God doesn't care what we do, he won't stop us, he won't help us, we are on our own. I don't believe in God, or prayer, and yet I don't kill people, steal, torture, hate, persecute, etc., you don't need to believe in God to live a good life, a life lived well even if you don't believe you'll get a couple dozen virgins for your efforts, or get to eat fried chicken with Jerry Falwell in heaven... It ain't about God, it's about you and me...and as Mr. Rogers said, "won't you be my neighbor?" I'd much rather have a good neighbor than Pat Robertson...much rather take part in a barbecue or a potluck than hearing what some domehead says God's told him. Much rather cooperate with everyone else on the planet to make this spinning little globe livable than to murder them because they sit atop a big cauldron of oil. It's time to put God where he belongs, in the history book, he's a luxury we as humans can't afford any longer...there are bigger fish to fry and hungry mouths to feed. The only heaven and hell that exists are what we as humans create, which of those are you creating? |
| I woke up the other morning at four AM and turned on PBS to see a show about a lost British expedition from the 1840's to find the Northwest Passage. The poor sailors all died, mostly of scurvy, lead poisoning, starvation and of course the unmitigating cold of the Arctic. But what was amazing to me was the pictures of corpses buried 150 years ago and frozen until now...they were perfect and hadn't decomposed one bit. Poor things! They had died of tuberculosis, but had elevated lead levels in their bones because of the canned goods meant to keep them alive. You really have to think what good a Northwest Passage would do if it were only passable for about a month out of a year. The sailing vessels were mired in ice which didn't melt for about five years, unusual, but untimely for them. I guess it's almost on a par with our plans to establish bases on the moon or Mars, it would take a certain kind of person to volunteer for such hazards. Back when the vessels took off they had amazing new ways of keeping them healthy, among them canned food and lots of lemon juice to stave off the scurvy. Unfortunately the tins of food were sealed with lead solder and contaminated, and the lemon juice lost the temporary benefit of vitamin C which dissipates over time. They thought they had all the answers to survive for years, they were wrong...we think we can foresee how to keep humans alive in space...I wonder. |
| I wish I had faith in the president's new 'strategy', but unfortunately he hasn't shown to this point he knows strategy from good apple butter. Maybe if we sent in 250,000 troops that were trained in police work we might have some chance of being successful, but our troops are soldiers and not policemen...it is a further waste of lives, time and money...how sad we don't have a leader with brains and sadder still the American electorate re-elected this hapless Wizard of Oz... There's no way we can stop what's happening in Iraq...I think impeachment is in order before we're bankrupted emotionally and financially...generals have been calling for more troops for over three years, I guess we should thank Bush for sending them some bandaids... |
| Top ten resolutions for 2007 10. To stay in touch with my inner otter 9. To think of work as if it were actually play 8. To get better at convincing a golf-ball to go where I want it to, rather than where it wants to 7. To have wonderful experiences, see wonderful sights, and have wonderful thoughts to write down 6. To be curious and turn over rocks to see what’s underneath 5. To make sure my face gets more laugh lines 4. To play well with others 3. To find a fun-loving she-otter to fall in love with 2. To believe in tomorrow as long as it doesn’t get in the way of enjoying today 1. To find that sparkly thing at the bottom of life’s pool |
| Gerald Ford trumped the Godfather of Soul, James Brown, with his untimely death. Although you really couldn't call the ex-president's death 'untimely' since he was in his nineties, so it kind of was to be expected. But, James Brown's death was overshadowed and no longer was front-page news like it should have been. When Ford and Brown, two luminaries, went down I started thinking who would be the third, since these things seem to come in threes. And now word comes of the execution of Saddam Hussein, which would make three luminaries down, so to speak. I'm not sure hanging someone counts here and perhaps the jury is still out. Saddam's death caught me by surprise, of course I haven't been keeping up with current events all that well lately. But I thought he still had plenty of war crimes yet to be tried, enough that there should have been several Saddams for all the hanging needed when he was found guilty of all of them. Perhaps they'll go ahead anyway and sentence him to death over and over, even if it's posthumous at this point. My personal pick for the third death of a famous person was Fidel Castro, his death is probably imminent and all the machinery of Cuban Communist propaganda will be helpless to prop him up any further. Fidel is pretty remarkable when you look at it, he has been a leader of a Central American country for over 50 years, which may just be a record in a region noted for political upheaval. You got to feel he's pretty lucky, or savvy, or something to finally be able to die of natural causes, rather than unnatural causes, like a bullet from some CIA sniper, poisoning by CIA poison, or even one of George Bush's 'Smart' bombs. Here in America we'll probably settle for Saddam being the third luminary death, although there is the possibility of some real ugliness happening in Iraq because of it that may make us wish he'd been allowed to die on his own. Like the war itself Saddam's death and a frenzy of bloodshed in Iraq seems to be out of our hands, even though we're supposedly in 'control' of the country. But I still think hanging someone is cheating Father Death somehow. He might still have the last laugh here and not accept Saddam as the third. If so, my vote goes to Castro. |
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