This week: Layers of Love Edited by: StephBee  
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“Love is friendship that has caught fire.” – Ann Landers
Romance: an ardent emotional attachment between two people. A love affair.
There are many different types of love. For example, there’s an all encompassing desire of love when you’re first dating, and a different kind of love when you hold your baby for the first time. The Greeks recognized there were several types of love we experience so I thought we’d take a look at them today.
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Love of Self – Philautia
This is the love we hold for ourselves. The Greeks often felt there were two sides, or natures, to this love – one with negative emotions and one with positive emotions. Negative self-love involves a quest for money, fame, or power and can present as narcissism.
A positive self-love encompasses a certain confidence and self-esteem in oneself as well as a commitment of service to others. This presentation of self-love lets us share our big hearts with the world around us.
The Greater Good – Pragma
To the Greeks, pragma was a love with such deep feeling that it often pushed us to do the right thing no matter what. For couples, it’s a focus of shared goals and compatibilities. It is what’s left when Eros and Ludos fade away.
Flirtatious and Fun – Ludos
Ah, Ludos is a playful kind of fun where we let go and let our hair down. We embrace our flirtatious side, our fun side, and enjoy having a lack of commitment. There’s just enjoyment of the moment, thus ludos tends not to last.
Passion and Desire – Eros
This love involves the romance and sexual desire we have for another person. It’s a love we chase after and aspire to capture, and when we do, it’s all consuming. However, it rarely lasts and it’s typical these intense emotions fade to the slow sustained burn of pragma.
Friends & Family – Philia
This is a warm sense of care and concern we have for our friends and family. It involves sincerity and intimacy in a platonic fashion. This love is often authentic and genuine and those involved feel secure that their deep feelings won’t fade away. This is precisely how I feel about my high school friends – 40 years later!
Love of a Child – Storge
This feeling is intense, powerful and unconditional. A parent finds themselves loving their child just as they are. These deep seated emotions leave a strong sense of protection where a parent will give up much for their child and expect nothing in return. Well, maybe a hug.   
Love of all things – Agape
This is the unconditional desire to do good in all things as one aspires to do. Agape compels one to volunteer at the local food pantry or in my case, in the boy scouts. Agape inspires us to simple acts of kindness. There is a warm and affectionate connection to nature, humanity, and the universe.
Question for you: As you look back on your writing, do you find these types love have found a way into your stories without you realizing it?
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| | | What Love Demanded (E) Two people loved each other deeply, and both paid the price for doing so. |
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Feedback from my Romance/Love newsletter dated: 21 JAN 26:
Annette 
The curly fonts are illegible on most screens. Please use more boring fonts for the Newsletter.
Good to know.
Maddie Stone <2026 Edition> 
Hello! For your question: I think Peeta was Katniss's soulmate and I believe she would fall into the first category of Independent Heroine.
My thoughts are that Gail was, in many ways, a reflection of herself. When Peeta showed her kindness (in her eyes in the beginning, she thought it was pity), she couldn't reconcile that notion because to acknowledge it made her feel less than and also made it hard for her to understand Peeta putting himself out there for her.
I think she perceives Peeta as weak and not her type, whereas Gail is more like her. As she and Peeta experience more together, she sees the strength in him and starts to shift. It is, like you said, a journey that helps her learn more about herself as she falls in love with him. They complement one another.
Great newsletter! Thank you!
Thank you for writing in. I agree – she’s definitely an independent heroine. I also think as Katniss and Peeta experienced more together, their feelings begin to shift.
StephBee is a 911 dispatcher for LAPD. Her story, "A Polish Heart," is available on Amazon in print and Kindle. Will an ocean keep Darrin and Sofia apart?
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Romance/Love: February 18, 2026 Issue [#13589]
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