Porthole

Ville de Nell

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Space Blog  (ASR) Cruising WDC cyberspace and raiding ports for blog prompts! #2223838 by Sharmelle's Expressions

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"To Wait and Remember"   [ASR] by K Renée (on the road)

Mini-review: Mournful. I love sad poems and this is definitely melancholic. It does well with the villanelle form as the repeating lines keep the second half while tweaking the first half. However, when read out loud I trip over certain lines as the rhythm and meter aren't quite regular and 'lose brighter star' and 'blanket of eves' strike me as odd and not in a good way. I think it's worth editing (for flow and rewording) after reading it out loud. I rate it a 4.7.

What do you think?

I think it influenced my poem:

"Till all Time ends [305]" 

I write best when I'm depressed. And autumn and twilight oft times match my mood.