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Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/books/entry_id/950365-My-Beginnings-As-A-Writer--Music-That-Describes-Me
Rated: 13+ · Book · Other · #1966420
Theses are my thoughts and ramblings as I forge my way through this thing they call life.
#950365 added January 25, 2019 at 10:49pm
Restrictions: None
My Beginnings As A Writer & Music That Describes Me
30 Day Blogging Challenge

How did you start writing? Did someone urge you to write, or did it come naturally?
I don't remember the exactness of the situation, but I was around seven years old. My parents were going through a rough patch - adultery and separation. I did not know the details. I just knew that something was not right and I turned to writing to make sense of things... to make things better. My stories were about children who were perfect and had perfect families. Certainly nothing that would be a proper story, but for me they were calming. A way of healing from the emotional pain that was being tossed about. Pain I had no way of controlling. In my stories I could control all the aspects and make things right.

Any stories I did show my mother were met with the red edit pencil. She could not understand how I could make so many spelling errors. If it was up to her she would hold me back a grade. Thank God she was not my teacher. She was a secretary who edited the letters and documents for the veterinarians she worked for in the Vet Lab Services branch of the government. I would give these stories to her and ask her to read for content.... at the age of eight, I learned that my mother was not a good listener. She would not do what I had requested, she would do what she usually did. I learned to keep my unedited stories away from her. My fragile creative heart couldn't handle her nitpicking.

A teacher that liked her read a few of my stories. He was genuinely enjoyed them... he read for content and understood my need to write and share. I am grateful for him and his kind soul. Thank you Walter Timmings where ever you are now.

I did have a grade seven teacher, Mr. Key, who introduced us to journaling. I could write anything I wanted and he would read it and comment on the content. A lot of what I wrote about was memoir - wanting someone to know me. I wrote a lot about my grandparents and their farm. A place I loved and felt close too. I wrote about my father, who had died in February the year I was in grade 6 (only eight months before). Again it was a way of processing big things, but Mr. Key was kind and understanding.

I remember my mother getting a hold of that journal and being upset that she was not written about - at that age she would not have wanted to know what I thought of her!!

As I got older, particularly high school, I channelled my pain and need to understand into writing poetry. My stories took on a more memoir feel and I tended to focus on what I did have that helped me... namely my Grandparents and my relationship with them.

My poetry still comes from that place of wanting to understand. My writing has evolved as well. The more I write the more evolved it becomes and I am pleased with what I am capable of now. I understand the concept of conflict fueling the story, but I also enjoy bringing characters to light and helping them move forward on their journey when their lives begin to twist and turn. There is deep satisfaction in that aspect. Writing still heals, but it also inspires and it is an aspect of my life that shines brightly and deeply. I thank God for the pleasure of having that creative outlet to help me in my own journey.

Just to clarify a few things: my mohter was depressed when I was a child and did not get help until I was closer to high school. She is much more supportive now that she is taking her 'happy pills' and I have also learned to only share stuff with her that is already editted - or I read it aloud.

Blog City - Day 1865

If you could only use music to describe yourself to someone, what song would it be and why? If you can add the YouTube link so we can hear it too.
Hmmmm. There are so many to choose from... I got it narrowed down to two. Secular and Christian... both with similar strength. Both of these songs inspire me to step up and go forward. Life can give you a beating, but it does not have to destroy you. I want to be that fighter. I want to have that kind of faith and a belief in God. A God that thinks I am one of HIS and I am wonderfully and gloriously made. God don't make junk.

The Fight Song by Rachel Platten


Like a small boat on the ocean
Sending big waves into motion
Like how a single word
Can make a heart open
I might only have one match
But I can make an explosion
And all those things I didn't say
Wrecking balls inside my brain
I will scream th em loud tonight
Can you hear my voice?

This time this is my fight song
Take back my life song
Prove I'm alright song
My powers turned on
Starting right now I'll be strong
I'll play my fight song
And I don't really care
If nobody else believes
Cause I've still got
A lot of fight left in me

Read more: Rachel Platten - Fight Song Lyrics | MetroLyrics


You say by Lauren Daigle - A Christian Artist


I keep fighting voices in my mind that say I’m not enough
Every single lie that tells me I will never measure up
Am I more than just the sum of every high and every low?
Remind me once again just who I am, because I need to know (ooh oh)
You say I am loved when I can’t feel a thing
You say I am strong when I think I am weak
You say I am held when I am falling short
When I don’t belong, oh You say that I am Yours
And I believe (I), oh I believe (I)
What You say of me (I)
I believe


© Copyright 2019 πŸ’™ Carly (UN: carly1967 at Writing.Com). All rights reserved.
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Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/books/entry_id/950365-My-Beginnings-As-A-Writer--Music-That-Describes-Me