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 |  Blog and other works of literary sense |
| Here is a collection of ruminations and whatnot. |
| I am disappointed greatly that the stimulus cheques that are to be sent to the US citizens will not happen. I saw that Mr Trump signed an executive order for some other thing related to COVID recovery. It looks as though the Dems are not interested and they've added a pork barrel item that the GOP can't stand so that means the stimulus bill is now dead in Congress. I have to say that the GOP is also having some issues with me namely that they are racist and they want to make blacks sad and also that they are making people into bastards and that is against God's Law. The Dems seem to think they can get some sympathy due to the BLM but now I am seeing they are cynically as well. They know full and well that the GOP won't go with this pork barrel item (this is the one where they want mail in balloting to happen in this election year). But they added it on anyway and they knew the GOP won't go for it and they also knew that the Stimulus Package won't work or go forward. What it means to me is that both GOP and Dems are trying to keep the Treasury from spilling its money to help those who are struggling, like my Dad and me. This Treasury thing is so precious to those in Congress because they can get retired and keep getting paid till they die and then after that they still get paid, for whatever reason - maybe their kids and wives have the money to go with them after the senators and congressmen and justices and presidents pass on. Who can really tell? Who has audited this anyway? What it tells me is that this Treasury is so fucking engorged with money that can help this Country's people and all they want is to spend it on a 9billion dollar fucking wall that blows over ina gale wind. How is that Trump? Where is this money really going to anyway? |
| I have been researching other countries as well. One, Japan. Then, Norway. Then, Paris. London is out. I rather not live in London. Too messy. Paris is a romantic city. It might be fun to always be in a city that's all about love. Norway is great for its cool and cold and chilly weather, depending on the month of the year. Japan is good to think of because of its placid atmosphere. I've met some Japanese who are so very placid, not any emotion cross their faces. But they do smile and look happy when they are happy. If they're not happy, they merely look thoughtful. Saudi is something I need to rethink. It could be good but I forgot it's filled with wealthy people and I don't care for wealthy people as a rule. They all tend to cluster together and look down on anyone who's not as loaded as they. Just a few thoughts. M. |
| Some Truths about Rejection 1. Rejection is simply the reaction or opinion of another person. 2. Rejection is powerless without your co-operation. 3. Rejection shows you others’ true colours, exposes all enemies, and closes every wrong door. 4. Rejection reveals those incapable of distinguishing your true worth. 5. Rejection is a guide, leading you away from deadened relationships while directing you towards healthy, positive relationships. 6. Rejection reveals who is intimidated by your potential. 7. Rejection reveals who or what doesn’t belong in your future. 8. Rejection is motivation to go in a new direction. Tracey Mitchell (abridged) #rejection#onlinecounselingcollege#inspiration#motivation#goals#success#mentalhealth#selfimprovement#onlinecounsellingcollege |
| I am feeling upbeat. I have been applying to foreign countries for a job. One of them tried to call me the other day. Or was it today in the early hours. They are wanting to call me or have me call them. Then later today I decided to apply to Saudi Arabia. They have a good position which I think will be a good match for me. I do not find Saudi Arabia to be difficult a country to live in. I have no religion. They are not interested in anyone celebrating any other faith there but Islam. I will not be a problem to them. I think they're decent. I do wish that I could find a place out of the USA. I am raring to leave. I think I've exhausted all the resources to live and work here. Those people, bastards all, who have been trafficking on my life will be made to answer for their sins and criminal acts. That is all for now. |
| Hi Everyone, I've had a brain wave. I think it might be a fun thing to move to Saudi Arabia. I looked at some of the things one needs to move there. I think it can be done. It does get really hot but who cares. I'll be mostly at home. I don't plan to do much driving anyway. I have learned they are rather progressive in many ways except for their religious ways. They forbid anything except Islam. I dont mind Islam. I am going to study Islam and see what it is all about. I'm not going to become one of those weirdos who spout Islamic stuff but it is a think that is something everyone needs to learn about. Islamic culture is not bad. I think we can learn from our Islamic neighbors. |
| Since habit is such a powerful influence, and we're used to pursuing our impulses to gain and avoid outside our own choices, we should set a contrary habit against that, and where appearances are really slippery, use the counterforce of our training."Epictetus-Discourses, 3.12.6 |
| 1. I’m funny. 2. I’m smart. 3. I am lovable. 4. I am good at typing. 5. I am good with pets. 6. I am good with elderly people and 7. I am good with children 8. I am good at creating novels and 9. I am good at making them into books 10. I am good at self-publishing My body image is not related to what I am as a person nor to my personality nor to my abilities I wear clothes that are able to fit me, and to move with me. I wear LuLaRoe because their clothes are just that way. LuLaRoe clothes are great looking, are good for outside – work and leisure. I feel good in LuLaRoe clothes all the time. LuLaRoe clothes are never junky looking nor are they what people call sweatshirt fashion. |
| I remember when I was still fully employed and getting to think of retirement. I'd decided then that even in retirement I'd still do something to keep me from getting stagnant. I still believe that people who are retired, or contemplating retirement, or being forced by circumstances (e.g. COVID) to retire or do something else should do something else that will keep their minds facile. Being in a state of inactivity, even with the mind left to its own circuitous and something downward paths can be very bad. It will cause one to feel depressed, unable to think clearly, unable to even utter any sort of prayers to God Above about how they feel. One needs to keep in touch with God each day. Retirement is something people tout, and say it's like a happy Saturday every day. But it's not quite all rosy. Many people have not enough money to retire on, but that may be the impetus to make them do work somewhere. Even if it's working for a store as a greeter, there's no shame in it. One can take classes at the community college. Or they can do this online. They can find other activities that would get them out of the house. Or they can work for some people that they know that they can help with. Or, church activities, helping there would be good. Teaching a church group or maybe some sort of volunteer job that they can have. I used to work as a volunteer at the local hospital, selling at the gift shop. That went from about 2000 to 2017. I enjoyed it and the hospital gave volunteers a treat - lunch on their dime. There are many avenues to get oneself out of their sad and somehow uselessness sort of thoughts. We can't give into thinking life is over just because the age you are in is in the range where retirement is 'forced' on you. |
| I am awake, have had coffee, cigs, breakfast. Washed my hair. Now am at the computer. Feeling unsympathetic. I have tried to do my best. I have not been successful. I do not know what else I have to do. I hate my father who is really my stepfather. I think he has lied to me all the time since he adopted me. He has no and had no wish to be a parent in my early years. He was no good with money. ALways had problems. Asked my stepmother to ask her cousin Maria Lagadon for cash every so often. I do not think he ever had a success with any job he ever had. Now he claims he has social security and I do not really know. I think he's a fake through and through. I'm trapped in this house with him as my whatever you can call it. He wants me to be seen as his 'girl' and I hate it. I am not interested in this sort of thing. I already have a lover and He is mine and I am His. I wish to be freed from the prison I am in. Please ask Someone to help me. I do not know how best to go through each day. I avoid him like he has the plague and yet I have to deal with talking to him sometimes so that he at least goes to find some things in the grocery to eat. Or to cook. I do not care to deal with his problems. I wish to go out of this country and live somewhere else where there are normal people who aren't ghouls or bastards. I cannot write anything. I find it hard to write my novels and I feel that if I did it would have a stain of this house in it. Love, Mary |
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