%%USERNAME%%    %%ACCWORDS%% %%ONOFF%% |
 |  Blog and other works of literary sense |
| Here is a collection of ruminations and whatnot. |
| I am awake, have had coffee, cigs, breakfast. Washed my hair. Now am at the computer. Feeling unsympathetic. I have tried to do my best. I have not been successful. I do not know what else I have to do. I hate my father who is really my stepfather. I think he has lied to me all the time since he adopted me. He has no and had no wish to be a parent in my early years. He was no good with money. ALways had problems. Asked my stepmother to ask her cousin Maria Lagadon for cash every so often. I do not think he ever had a success with any job he ever had. Now he claims he has social security and I do not really know. I think he's a fake through and through. I'm trapped in this house with him as my whatever you can call it. He wants me to be seen as his 'girl' and I hate it. I am not interested in this sort of thing. I already have a lover and He is mine and I am His. I wish to be freed from the prison I am in. Please ask Someone to help me. I do not know how best to go through each day. I avoid him like he has the plague and yet I have to deal with talking to him sometimes so that he at least goes to find some things in the grocery to eat. Or to cook. I do not care to deal with his problems. I wish to go out of this country and live somewhere else where there are normal people who aren't ghouls or bastards. I cannot write anything. I find it hard to write my novels and I feel that if I did it would have a stain of this house in it. Love, Mary |
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