Hi Gyn,
I can really appreciate 'poetic doodles'
Take a subject, and one can make a poem, and why indeed should the magnificent pachyderm not be included in our doodles.
Here again you have used just the appropriate adjectives to bring your elephants to life.
Well done!
Cheers Meg.
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Hi my dear Lou,
This is another trip back to your childhood that I love sharing with you.
From such humble beginnings you have come so far, yet still remember with love those who gave you your start in life.
The flickering light grew into a flame
As you grew you learned to play life's game.
There are ups and downs and highs and lows
But that is the way we learn how life goes.
Keeping love in your heart and God by your side
You can conquer the pitfalls and enjoy the ride.
Never forget, when things don't seem quite right,
The lessons you learned by that flickering light.
Love Meg.
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You're sure on a winner here, Nancy, I fancy.
Your poem will not give all entrants a chancey.
Trust you to come up with the party guest SUESS,
With Grinches and blue fish all on the loose!
Tell me if Doc. Suess asks you to do
A party for him,
I want to come too!!!!
Hi Mark,
I love limericks to read just for fun,
I'm pleased that I have read this one.
Like the poet from Pinner
I do like my dinner
Be it steak or a nice creamy bun!
Just my little suggestion to smooth out your limerick, Mark. (Only if you wish to of course)
In the 3rd line, I would delete the words "then" and 'a'
In the 4th line, I would delete the words "and" and "quite"
In the 5th line, delete "so".
Thanks for giving me a giggle to start my day.
Cheers Meg.
Little ghosts who appear to people, can make one feel a little uneasy.
Your little friend maybe sensed that feeling and waved to reassure you that all was okay.
It is not unusual for your brother not to have seen her. I think ghosts have the power to choose who can see them and who can't. She obviously liked the look of you.
A lovely story.
Cheers Meg.
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I do so love daffodils.
I could almost smell them as I read your words, and I could picture the field of yellow seemingly going on forever.
"A haven of peace and contentment"? Yes it certainly is!
A poem in which one can lose themselves in the peace and solitude.
Cheers Meg.
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So lovely, dear Lou, and so true.
I read it out to my daughter in law , and she loves it. She thinks you are very clever to take my words and make such a wonderful poem from them.
AND SO DO I !!!!!
A touching story like this one of yours has the power to keep me reading on, to hopefully hear a happy ending, while suffering every heartache with the characters.
You have done a marvellous job here.
You have made it so realistic with no events seeming ludicrous or improbable.
Not keeping to the point of the story and flying off on various tangents is a common fault in story telling. Your explanatory parts to fill the reader in on necessary background are kept brief and precise and satisfy the reader adequately.
Well done. Your talent for writing a genuine, realistic story is shown here.
Cheers Meg.
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Didn't quite know what to expect when I first saw this poem.
It is an amazing piece of work with a story that could be pictured in the mind of the reader so well.
The final stanza wraps it all up in a perfect "Moral of the story is..." ending.
I found this piece so easy to read with its perfect rhyme and rhythmic flow. You have done very well to give this item all of the factors of a satisfying and enjoyable read. This does not happen often in a poetic form, as the story line is too often lost with forced rhymes and unnecessary phrases.
There is absolutely nothing I could suggest to improve this work.
Well done!
Cheers Meg.
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We seem to get a bit of everything in this contest, and being a lover of Acrostics, I was pleasantly rewarded with this one.
This is a beautiful love poem written with obvious passion. Speaking your true feelings from the heart always makes a great poem.
Some typos/punctuation I would like to point out:-
2nd line :- Even when the rain falls, knowing you're there, eases my aching heart, and when... (commas after "falls" and "there" : "You're" not "your"
7th line :- within (one word)
A wonderful piece.
Most enjoyable.
Cheers Meg.
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Hi River,
Such a sad poem of loss, yet an uplifting one of memories.
When memories are all we have left, we must treasure them as much as we treasured the friendship that gave them to us.
A beautiful poem from the heart.
One little tip, River.
The mention of death in your poem requires a higher content rating than "E".
You may need to change this to "13+" content rating.
Cheers Meg.
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Spotting a limerick...it beckoned!
I must read this one...I reckoned.
A fun story it told
Of a Leprechaun's gold,
No wonder your limerick came second!!!
Well done!
I love a good limerick. There should be more of this type of fun writing.
Cheers Meg.
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A lovely story within this poem, Willow.
It is always taking a chance when a cat and dog are introduced as housemates, but your pair seem to have found a common ground.
Technically, your rhyming is great. A little work on the rhythm section would give this poem the polish it needs to read smoothly.
Apart from the technical side of things, I always enjoy a tale of animals with a happy ending.
Cheers Meg.
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Hi Pat,
I am reviewing this piece for the Rising Stars Shining Brighter Contest.
A wonderful poem, Pat, which reads with such a pleasant flow - so smoothly and almost musical.
Your choices of descriptive words are so natural sounding and do not appear forced or overly colourful at all, making the piece a more honest and heartfelt expression.
I did enjoy reading it and love the final stanza which proclaims your own responsibilities for your own choice of path you may take in Life.
No spelling or grammatical errors noticed, which is always a plus in this reader's eyes.
Well written.
Cheers Meg.
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Hi Maria,
I am reviewing your entry for the Rising Stars Shining Brighter Contest.
Your poem gives a definite message proclaiming your faith in the Lord and recognising the purpose of your being here on Earth.
This is an admirable proclamation and gives all who read it a chance to reflect on how thy are utilising this valuable time that God has given us to the best advantage.
I found no spelling errors nor anything I would feel could be changed to improve this piece.
Well done.
Cheers Meg.
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Hi Lou,
I have yet to read work by another poet who uses this form as well as you. You have mastered the form and made it somewhat of a trademark!
The prompt words would have meant nothing to my unimaginative mind,but you have woven them into a poetic tale of the dark kind.
Well done!
Cheers Meg.
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Hi Oldwarrior,
You could sure teach a lot of us Mums a thing or two.
As you mentioned, we may already know of some of your valuable hints, but a couple were new to me.
Can't wait to try them!
With all of the rain we have had here lately, the ants have taken over. I'm heading out now to draw all over the kitchen bench tops. Then I'm off to clean the mirrors!
Keep adding your helpful tips. They are great!
Cheers Meg.
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This has brought tears to my eyes, Julie.
Proud tears for a great Australian who was, and always will be dearly remembered for his True Blue spirit and love of his country and of course for his wonderful songs.
Thank you for this fitting tribute to a man who brought so much joy to Australians.
His brother in law, Reg Lindsay (the two boys were mates and married two sisters who were also country singers in their own right), passed away last year. They will be entertaining the angels forever.
I found this clipping re Reg Lindsay:- He also experienced some success in the United States and was the first Australian to be officially recognised with a plaque on Nashville's Walkway of Stars.
Thanks Julie, for sharing your love of country music with us.
Cheers Meg.
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A wonderful acrostic, Lou.
I didn't realise it was an acrostic until I was halfway through. The description of the old house had me mesmerised.
There was an old house up on the hill, when I was growing up.
Broken down, haunted? and unloved.
It too got a new lease of life and is now a beautifully restored heritage home.
Hopefully 227 Johnson Street is now filled with the love and the music of life that old houses deserve.
Cheers Meg.
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This is just a fantastic summary of a young boy's introduction to Anzac Day, it's significance and it's place in Australian history.
Congratulations on winning 3rd place in Honoring our Veterans contest. It is well deserved.
The Dawn Service, though usually quite short is one of the most moving parades one can be a part of.
I live on the coast and Anzac Park is situated on the beachfront. Seeing the dawn break over the bay is spectacular.
A service I would not miss each 25th April.
"ANZAC DAY - 25th APRIL"
Hope you enjoy this one.
Cheers Meg.
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Hi my dear Sherri,
You have echoed my thoughts in this beautiful poem of love and devotion to your Mother.
We may have the love of our family and friends to make our lives content, but without that special lady, somehow our lives do not seem complete.
She will always be with you, watching over you from that special cloud.
Each time you think of her, she is blowing you a kiss.
I am so grateful, also, to have had such a wonderful Mum, and I too still celebrate her birthday.
Simply beautiful.
Cheers Meg.
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Hi Sherri,
This is a wonderful tribute to a man who with his last breath did not condemn the one who took his life, but thanked the one who had enriched his life.
In your brief description, you say it is a Poem of tragedy...that it is, yet the thought foremost in these words is "He called me friend".
A heartfelt poem, Sherri, which brought tears to my eyes and a lump to my throat.
Love Meg.
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