Heart felt with love. I'm sure your poem could be echoed by thousands of mothers who have little girls who have become sad young women. Thanks for sharing your heart.
An interesting piece. You lead from one exciting action packed minute to the next with strong emotion and vivid imagery and kept my interest to see what was happening next. Your ending sentence "War was coming!" provokes the response of more more.
Well done, perhaps we can see a follow up piece forming a chapter in a novel?
Your imagery was very good. I could smell the smoke and hear the train clacking as it went. It also conjured up memories of "breakmen" I remember from my own childhood.
Thanks for a ride down memory lane. Anyone interested in trains of yesteryear would enjoy this poem.
Wow! For being rusty that was good. Good points about the stats on abortions.
I live in a third world country and here the ladies are shocked that women in America, N.Z. or Australia would "kill" their unborn babies. They think it is very uncivilized.
They say "if that is being civilized we're glad we aren't!"
I enjoyed your essay. You know, I thought I was the only one my age that has her own box of 64 crayons!
However my married childrren know I love them so I usually get at least one box of 64 or sometimes 96 for Christmas presents! *grins*
Thanks for a great article to bring out the kid in us once again.
John, this was easy to get into. You do a good job capturing interest and getting people on the side of Zero.
Your description gives readers a personal glimps of this young cocky pilot and draws you into the storyline.
You use the "twist" effectively. I was expecting him to "win" something but not go into battle with the squadron. However we were expecting him to "prove himself someway.
Nice poem, I enjoyed it and it envoked strong images in my mind. Poetry does that though, doesn't it? With a few words you paint a picture for all to see. Well done.
I especially liked the imagry of the old woman shaking her broom at the children and shouting at them.
Keep going with your poetry. Not everyone can.
I saw you in the newbie newsletter. It worked: I dropped by your port. Hope you have the time to return the favor. If you do, I'll welcome you to my world.
Glittering, this was a depressing poem. If your too closed in maybe it's time to get out and look in different places. You have a lot to give and a lot to receive.
Drop by my port and come to my corner of the world and enjoy the view from the sunny South Pacific.
I really liked this poem. It holds your attention to the last line!
If you're ever in the neighborhood drop by for tea. (visit my port and my world and if you do please leave feedback for me.)
I have had several people try my Writing.Com/authors/allie but instead of me they get Anne (who has not set bios yet) Am I telling them wrong or what?
Thanks for the help.
Allie
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