Hi ,
Happy Belated WDC Anniversary!
I’m honored to read and review 'Just for You'
I was totally unaware of this group. Wow, what a great find!
Contents: You've created such a lovely variety of C-Notes for any occasion. I'm totally impressed.
Please remember, I'm just a writer like you, and always take reviews with a grain of salt. You have to decide what is best for your work and follow your heart.
Thank you for sharing your work here on WdC.
Amay
Title: I have to be honest, when I first looked I just skimmed and thought it said Race Time... totally different from what I expected. I'll have to pay closer attention (or get better glasses?)
Description: This is where I realized, whoa, something is different... Nice tie in to your piece.
Contents: Your poem flows with a natural ease in reading. It's focus in dealing with running out of time before the race is won, and the emotions and fears of not making the grade.
Thumbs up: Love the use of metaphors within your poem
Conventions: Nothing caught my eye.
Please remember, I'm just a writer like you, and always take reviews with a grain of salt. You have to decide what is best for your work and follow your heart.
Thank you for sharing your work here on WdC.
Amay
Hi Margot77,
I hope you had a Happy WDC Anniversary!
I’m honored to read and review 'Laws of Acquisition.'
Title: Your title brought back a lot of memories. The Ferengi were such law abiding folks.
Description: Brief- tells what the piece was written for, but no real tease or hint about it
Contents: Your poem made me think about the old Star Trek, that I grew up with, the Next Generation that my kids still watch when they can find it. Henry Mudd, what a guy. Oh my goodness, what would he ever do without Stella! I bet get into a lot more trouble.
Thumbs up: Thank you for bringing up such fond memories of times gone by...
Conventions: I wonder if Henry Mudd's no should be in quotes with an exclamation mark
Please remember, I'm just a writer like you, and always take reviews with a grain of salt. You have to decide what is best for your work and follow your heart.
Thank you for sharing your work here on WdC.
Amay
I’m honored to read and review 'A Palace Called "My Imagination"'
Title: I love this title. Even before I started reading the poem, it called to me. What a wonderful descriptor of your imagination.
Description: I think this is one of the first pieces you posted here on WDC. You've given a port raider something to think about , shall I open this up and read it? I know I'm glad I did.
Contents: Whimsy is something that came to mind when I read this poem. A poem of contrasts, showing the power of the imagination of a small child. Delightful!
Thumbs up: For bringing back memories of watching Cinderella on TV and then playing dress up with my imaginary friends.
Conventions: There is a typo in the next to the last line.... giant
Please remember, I'm just a writer like you, and always take reviews with a grain of salt. You have to decide what is best for your work and follow your heart.
Thank you for sharing your work here on WdC.
Amay
I’m honored to read and review 'Starting out Small'
Title: Your title perfectly fits your poem.
Description: Works well.
Contents: Your poem describes a point of life that every reader comes to know. I don't know anyone that hasn't told a lie, or been lied to. We've all been in situations, even as a child, where we've told a lie to cover our own rears.
Thumbs up: You've given the reader the opportunity to grow by presenting the harms of lies without being preachy about it.
Conventions: No errors noted.
Please remember, I'm just a writer like you, and always take reviews with a grain of salt. You have to decide what is best for your work and follow your heart.
Thank you for sharing your work here on WdC.
Amay
Welcome to the Power Raiders Weekend Raid. Today, I’m looking specifically at pieces for children.
I’m honored to read and review Loft Monster.
Title: This piece brought back memories of reading 'There's a monster in the closet... series to my own boys.
Description: The description works well with the poem.
Contents: You've captured a moment in time where the young child's imagination and flights of fancy try to make sense of a quick glimpse of something in the loft. Super hero mom comes to the rescue. Thankfully, or hopefully there wasn't anything in the box!
Thumbs up for capturing a memory that you'll be able to share for years.
Conventions: I wondered about the last line, since the poem is mostly written from the point of view of the child, perhaps 'he' would work better than him.
Please remember, I'm just a writer like you, and always take reviews with a grain of salt. You have to decide what is best for your work and follow your heart.
Thank you for sharing your work here on WdC.
Amay
Welcome to the Power Raiders Supporting Young Authors Weekend Raid.
I’m honored to read and review Tall Standings
Title: I must admit, I misread the title the first time. My age showing I immediately thought about Standing Tall.
Description: Interesting description, but it tells nothing about your piece.
Contents: Your poem creates a scene in the reader's imagination of the devastation of a grove of trees, forest, etc. It reminds me of when an area close to my home was treed for profit. The devastation of the hundreds of acres of land broke my heart realizing how many habitats were destroyed.
Thumbs up: But they stood tall. Even through their own amputation- what a message in life.
Conventions: No errors noted
Please remember, I'm just a writer like you, and always take reviews with a grain of salt. You have to decide what is best for your work and follow your heart.
Thank you for sharing your work here on WdC.
Amay
Hi Mrs. Angela,
Happy WDC Anniversary!
I’m honored to read and review "Stop, Drop and Roll on Your Knees"
Title: Interesting title, for a minute there I thought it was going to be a piece about fire safety. Maybe in the longest term, it is.
Description: You've dropped a hint, that didn't click with me. I guess I was still of the 'fire safety theme'
Contents: You've covered a list of steps, or instructions for a great prayer life. The key elements are highlighted with scripture references. Your piece is short, sweet and to the point, it would be nice to read about how these elements are having an effect in your personal spiritual journey.
Thumbs up - for standing up for your beliefs, and setting an example for others to see.
Conventions: I'm so glad you added your references to the scriptures, since not all were from the same version.
Please remember, I'm just a writer like you, and always take reviews with a grain of salt. You have to decide what is best for your work and follow your heart.
Thank you for sharing your work here on WdC.
Amay
Hi Von Garrett,
Happy WDC Anniversary!
I’m honored to read and review A Cold Wind Blows Through New Orleans.
Title: The title fits your piece wonderfully
Description: Indeed your tale is short.
Contents: I have no idea where your idea came from, but holy cow! You have a way with words that surround your reader with the images of what is happening to this poor woman. Personally, I would encourage you to continue... you have the beginnings of a series of stories, or novel.
Thumbs up: You've got a great start... please, keep going!
Conventions: no errors noted
Please remember, I'm just a writer like you, and always take reviews with a grain of salt. You have to decide what is best for your work and follow your heart.
Thank you for sharing your work here on WdC.
Amay
Hi Rayman77,
Happy WDC Anniversary!
I’m honored to read and review 'personal nonsense'
Title: Your title fits with the contradictions found within your poem
Description: I know the feeling, it is what it is.... but this is the place to capture the readers attention, to encourage them to enter your port. The description phase of writing to me is one of the hardest parts, because it is what I've done and paring it down to ninety characters is hard sometimes.
Isn't it amazing that when we look at ourselves we're full of contradictions. Nicely put in poem form.
Please remember, I'm just a writer like you, and always take reviews with a grain of salt. You have to decide what is best for your work and follow your heart.
Thank you for sharing your work here on WdC.
Amay
Description: If the title piqued my interest, your description was the bait, hook, line and sinker. I didn't know what a small stone poem was, so I had to find out.
Contents: What a beautiful form and description. Indeed, your verse precisely captures the joyful antics of many of the common birds in the area.
Thumbs up: Thank you for introducing me to a new and delightful form of poetry.
Conventions: No errors noted.
Please remember, I'm just a writer like you, and always take reviews with a grain of salt. You have to decide what is best for your work and follow your heart.
Thank you for sharing your work here on WdC.
Amay
Happy WDC Anniversary! (A little late, please forgive)
I’m honored to read and review 'Floating'
Title: The title totally fits your poem
Description: I know everyone can relate to the 'current' state of your affairs. A nice draw into your piece.
Contents: Thunderstorms are so powerful and are a perfect way to illustrated your emotional state. With you as the lightening ready to strike out, I think I'm probably glad I was safe in the sunshine on the other side of the computer. I totally understand the feelings, the anger pent up waiting to blow.
Thumbs up: "Turmoil fills my own soul just watching, waiting for release.
Pent up angst, anger, animosity, waiting to explode out and open,
Leaving me vulnerable. " Through your words the reader can relate on so many levels. Reliving their past through vicious storms, or tension filled situations.
Conventions: no errors noted
Please remember, I'm just a writer like you, and always take reviews with a grain of salt. You have to decide what is best for your work and follow your heart.
Thank you for sharing your work here on WdC.
Amay
I’m honored to read and review Daddy, You are Special
Title: Personal opinion- Your title says it all.
Description: Fathers play such an important role in the family. Their strength and character are needed by their children.
Contents: Being a 'daddy's girl' all my life, your poem brings back many loving memories. Tickling and tucking in to bed, dumping out of bed in the morning (not really that harsh). It makes me realize how much I miss my Daddy. You've touched my heart this afternoon.
Thumbs up: For presenting father's in such a positive light.
Conventions: No errors noted.
Please remember, I'm just a writer like you, and always take reviews with a grain of salt. You have to decide what is best for your work and follow your heart.
Thank you for sharing your work here on WdC.
Amay
Description: Love poem ?-- I think yes, a love poem.
Contents: Your poem flows well. It creates visions of what is happening in the moment. It stirs the emotions of the reader. Very nicely done. It easily reminds me of the difficulties in long distance relationships. Being there totally in the moment, not wanting the time to end. Then having to wait, impatiently for the next opportunity to be together.
Thumbs up: "I no longer feel as if I am alone,
thinking of you makes me bold
thank you for being there
for breaking fears freezing hold
giving me the reason to care." Wonderful!
Conventions: willing my love to be in your prescence- sp presence
Mind and body tuned to a daze,- Tuned to a daze or turned to a daze?
Please remember, I'm just a writer like you, and always take reviews with a grain of salt. You have to decide what is best for your work and follow your heart.
Thank you for sharing your work here on WdC.
Amay
Title: I'm sure Nicole was pleased to have this beautiful poem entitled for her. I know I would be tickled.
Description: Your description sums it all up. Being in love, in total harmony with each other is simple wonderful.
Contents: A short poem about finding the delight in the simple wonders of life. A time when everything is fresh and new, and all is good with the world.
Thumbs up: For expressing so sweetly the joys of new love.
Conventions:Hey you… she gently greets- quotation marks around what she says.... then quotes in the last two lines for what is being said.
Please remember, I'm just a writer like you, and always take reviews with a grain of salt. You have to decide what is best for your work and follow your heart.
Thank you for sharing your work here on WdC.
Amay
Hi Mitch Hall,
I’m honored to read and review Big Kids
Title: This title drew me in, I married a big kid
Description: Your description says a whole lot, without giving away your message.
Contents: Your poem flows and has a natural rhythm that doesn't feel forced at all. That's a gift that everyone doesn't have.
Stay young at heart. Memories will fade, but find the joy in life's moments!
Thumbs up: For being a BIG KID! Enjoy!
Conventions: We do it our way, as is our wont>>> want
Easygoing yet essential-- if you wish, you could put a comma for a slight pause after easy going.
Please remember, I'm just a writer like you, and always take reviews with a grain of salt. You have to decide what is best for your work and follow your heart.
Thank you for sharing your work here on WdC.
Amay
Hi Kage,
I’m honored to read and review 'I Don't Understand'
Title: Honestly, I think your title sums up the whole of 9/11
Description: At some point you may want to add some information about this wonderful poem to your description. It is noteworthy and even contest entries deserve a little credit to show case your work.
Contents: I think this past year with all the anniversary ceremonies, a lot of emotions were brought back to the surface. I remember where I was, I remember knowing that several parents of students in our school were US Air employees and up in the air. You've captured a moment and moved to the present. Somethings we just can't afford to forget.
Thumbs up: "Never give up.
Because they didn't.
So you can't." >> What wonderful words to live by.
Conventions:
>> For me , there was no one there waiting. >> me, >> you have an extra space.
>> I had hopped that we would see this to the end >> sp- hoped
Please remember, I'm just a writer like you, and always take reviews with a grain of salt. You have to decide what is best for your work and follow your heart.
Thank you for sharing your work here on WdC.
Amay
Hi Fleetfoot,
I’m honored to read and review 'Gone: A Thought'.
Title: I like the title it fits well with the first part of your poem.
Description: Using your repeated line in the description gives the reader a hint of what it to come,
Contents: You've created a piece that could very easily be two separate poems, but they work so well together that I can see why you've kept them together. The sense of death and loss is so palpable, and you create the sense of hope and wonder of life in the second part of your poem. It's like a study in contrast almost.
Thumbs up: "We have to laugh until it hurts.
We need to dance with abandon, forgetting the steps.
We need to spin until we're dizzy.
We need to dream." Without which there really isn't much worth living for.
Conventions: I didn't notice anything...
Please remember, I'm just a writer like you, and always take reviews with a grain of salt. You have to decide what is best for your work and follow your heart.
Thank you for sharing your work here on WdC.
Amay
I’m honored to read and review 'A Different World'
Title: There are times in everyone's life when they wished they lived in a different world. Appropriate title for your poem.
Description: Poetry is daunting- sometimes. Personally, if it comes from the heart- it's poetry. There are so many forms, styles, structural points that it is easy to think you don't know enough about the topic. Let your words flow from your heart.- that's where true poetry sends your emotions through your words to your reader.
Contents: I love the way your lines lead the reader through your poem. It gives natural pauses, moments for the reader to contemplate the emotions that are building. You lead the reader into the aloneness that is depression, the feeling of inadequacy, the feeling of oppression.
Thumbs up: I love how you've honored Christo's help in your work. Honestly, I've never thought about doing that as I revise with hints from other readers. Thank you for that idea.
Conventions: I think the revision is very well done. I'm glad you left the original here as well.
Please remember, I'm just a writer like you, and always take reviews with a grain of salt. You have to decide what is best for your work and follow your heart.
Thank you for sharing your work here on WdC.
Amay
Hi Rookh Squeglia,
Happy Anniversary.
I’m honored to read and review- L.T.S
Title: Works well with your tribute
Description: Your description is appropriate for the content
Contents: You've created a tribute to a person that I don't know. From your words and your descriptions, I feel like I know a little about him. Things that you remember with fondness. I can imagine someone similar to my grandfather sitting with his cigarette on the front steps of his house. Fond memories, happy memories, and loving memories that keep the spirit of someone special alive in your heart.
Thumbs up: for creating a wonderful tribute
Conventions: No errors noted
Please remember, I'm just a writer like you, and always take reviews with a grain of salt. You have to decide what is best for your work and follow your heart.
Thank you for sharing your work here on WdC.
Amay
Hi Riley Black,
Happy Anniversary!
I’m honored to read and review - Become
Title: Works well with your poem
Description: A profound description
Contents: Interesting poem. Its meter flows so well. The depth of perception is easily visible, but I wonder how many will miss the message. I know I enjoyed the enlightened metaphor, and that it ends on a sign of possible hope for the future.
Thumbs up: I loved the way you used alliteration in your poem. Nicely done, it adds to the flow of your poem
Conventions: no errors noted
Please remember, I'm just a writer like you, and always take reviews with a grain of salt. You have to decide what is best for your work and follow your heart.
Thank you for sharing your work here on WdC.
Amay
Hi Sorcha,
Welcome to WdC. I hope you enjoy it just as much as I have.
I’m honored to read and review- Screaming
Title: Your title pulled me in. There was a lot of screaming around here early this morning, but that's another story.
Description: Your description is very deep and well thought out.
Contents: Interesting take. There is so much despair in our world. We're so busy in our own little cells to think about those outside our center core. The hope is not to turn our backs on others, but yet we do. It's easier to put the blinders on than to take a moment to help those in need.
Conventions: In the stanza - Soldier on, be strong... I have a question. Should those lines be in quotation marks? I'm not really sure. Perhaps italics would denote that this is what someone should be saying. Just something to ponder.
Please remember, I'm just a writer like you, and always take reviews with a grain of salt. You have to decide what is best for your work and follow your heart.
Thank you for sharing your work here on WdC.
Amay
Welcome to WdC.
I’m honored to read and review- Waiting
Title: Your title is right on target for your poem.
Description: Light and dark are such great metaphors in poetry. Your description would draw a variety of readers into your port to read.
Contents: As I read and re-read your poem, so many thoughts and levels of ideas came to mind. It challenged me to think deeper and create my own interpretation based upon my experiences. I thought about the changes that were promised politically. I thought about the changes in my unstable sister-in-law. You really opened a lot of doors for me. Nicely done!
Thumbs up: for creating a poem that speaks to so many different areas of life, so many different cultural current events, without being 'preachy'.
Thank you for using a larger font! There are many older readers here on WdC and it is helpful not to have to squint at the computer screen.
Conventions: Revile or reveal- either would work in the last line. I just wanted to make sure you have what you really want there.
Please remember, I'm just a writer like you, and always take reviews with a grain of salt. You have to decide what is best for your work and follow your heart.
Thank you for sharing your work here on WdC.
Amay
Hi Zachary,
I’m honored to read and review -A Romantic Evening
Title: Works well with your title
Description: This is your hook to draw people into your port to read. Entice your audience.
Contents: Very cute story. I'd punch up the ending a little. She storms from the house, or something a little more powerful than she leaves. The judges love twists at the end. I think you've got that covered.
Thumbs up: Your set up of your story is great. Nice light read for a Saturday morning.
Please remember, I'm just a writer like you, and always take reviews with a grain of salt. You have to decide what is best for your work and follow your heart.
Thank you for sharing your work here on WdC.
Amay
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