I enjoyed reading your poem it is full of emotion, I really can relate to the feelings you show through the poem. Thank you for sharing it with us.
Donna
I really enjoyed reading the first chapter
When you said (being the one to put my asleep) Did you mean (me)
I liked the way you introduced and described your characters.
Donna
I really enjoyed reading your story, I loved the way you introduced your characters. and the description, it kept me wanting to read more. I felt that I was right there with your characters and hope to read more of your story
Donna
I really enjoyed reading your story, I liked the way you introduced and developed your characters and the detail in your story.
The last sentence though you missed the h out of thought.
Donna
I really enjoyed reading your story and look forward in reading the rest.
I liked the way you described the scene but I think you could add a bit more description on your charachter. the story is brillient though.
Donna
Hi I really enjoyed reading your story and hope you write and add a bit more to this story. I loved the way you introduced your character and the detail in the story you could see through the characters eyes.
Donna
Hi I loved this story to I liked the way you introduced your characters and the way you are developing them. I read the first part and it made me want to read the second part. You will have to let me know when you have put the third part on. I really enjoyed the story
Donna
Hi Showren
I really enjoyed reading your story, I love to read vampire stories and writing about them. I loved the way you got your character to tell the story it is a brillient story
Donna
Hi Phoenix Blade, Wow, your poem is beautiful what feelings you brought out with your words. It is a pleasure to read such a beautiful poem hope to read more.
Donna
I love the story couldn't wait to finish reading it. Loved the way you introduced your characters. I enjoyed reading it it kept me on the edge of my seat. Would love to read more of the story
Hi Chefo
What a story it kept me on the edge of my seat.
I liked the way you introduced your characters and the way they interacted with each other. Keep writing. I really enjoyed reading your story
donnapeppy
Hi Brokenhunter
What a good story, it sure kept me on the edge of my seat.
There are however a few spelling mistakes and a couple of words missing but what a story.
You have developed your character really well and the emotion fear you brought out was very well done. I really enjoyed reading your story.
(A peal of laughter rang out behind from behind him ) Did you mean to say this?
Would it read better if you wrote.
(A peal of laughter rang out from behind him.)
(his breath barley cam missed the e off)
(As hea4d they were deigned )
(designed)
(Allow them to pull him aside he would become lost.)
(then)
(As he feel a eerily glowing)
(felt an)
This is only a suggestion.
I really have enjoyed reading your story and hope to read more.
All Writing.Com images are copyrighted and may not be copied / modified in any way. All other brand names & trademarks are owned by their respective companies.
Generated in 0.22 seconds at 10:12am on May 06, 2024 via server web1.
View Portfolio
Visit Notebook
Send Gift Points
Awards
Badges
Send Email
Community Newsfeed
General Discussion
Sponsored Items
Book of Trinkets
Static Items
Books
Groups
Interactive Stories
Audio
Campfire Creatives
Community Notes
Crossword Puzzles
Documents
Folders
Images
In & Outs
Madlibs
Photo Albums
Polls
Product Reviews
Quizzes
Survey Forms
Web Pages
Word Searches
