Great work. Word choice and form excellent. The theme is well developed and executed.
Only observation would be the end of line I assume the last word is touch- but my spelling gets muddied up by typing at times so no worries. Overall it works. That's the acomplishment.
Keep writing.
Good work. I liked the flow and word choice. establishing the sensual without wandering into specifically into the erotic is tough but you've managed it, maintaining and completing the mood in a satisfactory - pleasing image and closing.
Keep writing.
Great piece. Great choice and exposition of the 'hero' status of this man. He would certainly deny being a hero - he would probably just shrug and say it was his duty. - not a word used in that sense much any more. I have also met men like this man and am in awe of them as well. These are the real heros of the world. Thanks for reminding me and all of us of that fact.
Keep writing.
Great work. Good impressions can be so important that we lose track of these less attractive impressions. I loved the list format and the exploration of the 'dark corners' which really are as important than our public face when trying to understand ourselves and others.
Keep writing.
Great work. I liked the structure and word choice and even more i liked the imagery - the pause the withdrawl from the mundane pursuing the muse. I good description of the feeling of many of us who are struck by this wayward pursuit. Well done.
Keep writing.
I liked the word choice and structure. The observation of ourselves at the heart of it is muddled - intentionally I hope - the value we place on ourselves as based on our rightness. always a scary proposition, and often unproductive unless compared to others same observations. I think.
Keep writing.
Great work. I liked your word choice and structure building up the death's head and tearing it down with defiance and spirit. In the end is the Illusion the fear of death or the ability to face nit contently. A slick piece of philosophy slipped into a poem. Well done.
Keep writing.
Great work on the 'fatal attraction' of the storybook endings. We often need them as children, but for some of us the costs of the real world and leaving it behind are much higher than for others. A difficult theme confronted by the child seeking the escape into stories. Too terrible and too true, but a gleam of hope can enter along the way.
Keep writing.
Good work. I loved the word choice and theme building along the way. We are all those children in some corner of our soul despite the demands of years and life. You've captured both.
Keep writing.
Great work. I liked the word choice and form. A well done description of the danger in changing relationships as well as the possibilites.
Keep writing.
great work drawing us a bit into the pain of the lost boy and the pain of those around. We all lose a bit when such tragedies touch our lives - you have captured a bit ofthe loss and confusion - facing the darkness surrounding those thoughts and surviving is hard - seeking the lesson of the silenced boy is harder.
Keep wriintg.
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