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Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/profile/reviews/hollymerry
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1,473 Public Reviews Given
1,527 Total Reviews Given
Review Style
Honest and encouraging
I'm good at...
Proofreading for grammar, letting you know which areas of your writing work and which might be improved
Favorite Genres
Fantasy, historical, adventure, sci-fi
Least Favorite Genres
Murder, horror, erotica
Favorite Item Types
I’m happy to review all types of item
I will not review...
Anything with graphic violence, sexual content or profanity
Public Reviews
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1
Review by HollyMerry
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (5.0)
I thought the idea of a teenager being sucked inside a favourite game and learning from her experiences made an intriguing read. Although I could see why she found the world interesting and made a bond with the AI character, I could also understand the sense of panic and how the expereince made her realise the value of the real world. The story was creatively done. I would like to know in a bit more detail how exactly being pulled inside the screen feels so I could picture this bit better, also a few examples of her tenacity and time bonding with AI would be great to read about too.
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2
Review of Magic Fairies  
Review by HollyMerry
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (5.0)
This is a cute story about not only the magic of childhood and fairytales but the love of a grandmother for her granddaughter. The way the grandmother goes out of her way to make magical memories for the little girl as they catch firefly fairies was heartwarming and shows there’s magic to be found in the everyday.
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Review of A Fairy Encounter  
Review by HollyMerry
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (5.0)
This was a vividly described and enjoyable read full of fairytale elements. I enjoyed how the creature draws on tales like the bad wolf but actually the frightening creature was a friend of benevolent fairies who led the main character to see them. I enjoyed how the end of the story cast doubt over if it was really a dream or not as the character woke up with a flower in their palm.
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4
Review by HollyMerry
Rated: E | (5.0)
This is a sensible piece of advice and I can see how integrating aspects of the mannerisms and appearance of the people you see in everyday life adds believably to your writing. So many famous writers do and have done this and I remember reading that Charles Dickens did something similar to invent his many famous characters.
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5
Review by HollyMerry
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | N/A (Review only item.)
A very realistic dialogue that could be a transcript of a call for a woman who is not paying her inheritance tax. It was interesting to see you writing in this realistic style as it is different from a lot of the historical and fantasy stories of yours that I have read and shows your versatility as a writer.
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6
Review of Half a unicorn  
for entry "under the apple tree " 
Review by HollyMerry
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (5.0)
This opening made me wonder what Ali will find in the large house and ended too soon on a cliffhanger. Is there more of the story? If so I hope to read it someday, and if not I hope that you will have time snd be inspired to write more soon! A nicely paced, interesting read.
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Review of Half a unicorn  
for entry "shadows and owls" 
Review by HollyMerry
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (5.0)
I enjoyed how the tension continues as the father thinks there is something odd about Ali and warns Toby here. I wondered why he won’t be leaving her the future and what his expectations are in life eg does he think he’ll take over the farm so doesn’t need to leave home to train for other work?
I enjoyed reading more about the nature of unicorns through Ali’s conversations with the owl and snake, such as they are very curious creatures. I liked the owl calling her a princess as this hints at how special she is.

This should be ‘guard with its tone’ — ‘gaurd with it's tone’


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
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8
Review of Half a unicorn  
for entry "Only children" 
Review by HollyMerry
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (5.0)
This chapter was a more peaceful one where I got to know more about the characters. Having Justin unable to hear Ali added a lot of humour. It also inspired me to wonder why Toby and Erica can hear Ali and what makes them special, this made me want to read on.
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Review of Half a unicorn  
for entry "Break time" 
Review by HollyMerry
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (5.0)
It was nice to see Erica becoming accepted as a friend by Ali here. It was another good chapter and nice to see Ali behaving nicely and taking the men by surprise.

I didn’t know who said ‘Ready to do this boys?’ I think it might have been the father but it could have been another man. Perhaps you could make this clearer? Also, why are the men distraught when they head home as I’d have thought they would be glad not to have to do more work with Ali?
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Review of Star  
Review by HollyMerry
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (5.0)
I loved the idea of falling stars become geodes and gemstones. What can seem a moment of beauty too soon over is not actually over in the cycle of life as the shooting star is transformed over time after hitting the earth. The short lines and stanzas add a sense of postivie beat to the poem full of beautiful imagery.
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11
Review by HollyMerry
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: ASR | (5.0)
Such a poignant and beautifully written poem. The metaphor of the sea for life and being carried away by death was powerful and conveys the irresistible passing of time as well as the struggles, burdens and happiness in the beloved mother's life. The contrast between power and frailty was poignantly done and the poem conveyed a lot though short.
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Review by HollyMerry
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
I enjoyed how this poem invested a particular flower which such character and poignance as it focuses on a late blooming chrysanthemum. The vivid imagery of the poem is displayed in the lovely choice of words. The memorable and original images evoking the mood of the poem included my favourtie: 'the last light of autumn’s candle melt'.
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Review of Half a unicorn  
for entry "Before the break" 
Review by HollyMerry
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (5.0)
I hope Ali will be okay with Toby bringing his little sister to see her and the men don’t break her in. I feel very invested in the characters at this point and the dilemma for Toby makes me wonder what will happen next as his parents, especially his father, don’t understand that Ali us a unicorn.
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14
Review of Half a unicorn  
for entry "A deal" 
Review by HollyMerry
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (5.0)
Toby snd Ali deepen their bond despite Ali’s mistrust here as they make a deal. I like how as soon as this is done more tension is added as Toby’s father arrives and threatens that Ali will be broken in. The humour as he says Toby is making the horse neigh but he is actually talking to her was nicely done.
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Review of Summer Squalls  
Review by HollyMerry
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (5.0)
I enjoyed this poem with its interesting Gwawdodyn format. It looks like it took some time to complete to fit the pattern and I thought it was a fun twist that the poem is about rain as it rains a lot in Wales (I live in Wales and can vouch for it being very rainy at times!). The poem captures the joy of a rainy day, especially for children who enjoy playing in puddles and with their rubber ducks.
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Review of Playing  
Review by HollyMerry
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (5.0)
This poem captures the love of a dog and the sadness that they have to leave us so soon which is the most tragic thing about the bond with a pet. I love how you captured the character of the dog as they do things they love, like playing with favourite toys, and what a good companion they are sitting nearby and clearly very attached.
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Review of "Lost Soul"  
Review by HollyMerry
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (5.0)
I enjoyed reading this spiritual poem about the sea and how the bad weather and storms can make the ghost ship feel tossed. This poem uses the sea and ship as a metaphor for how life's ordeals affect a person and it was nice that towards the second stanza the speaker of the poem realises God can comfort them in their despair like a rescuer at sea.
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Review of The Ocean  
Review by HollyMerry
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (5.0)
I enjoyed this poem that captures the charm of the sea and how its different moods, from calm to tempestuous, can bring such enjoyment. The lovely pictures accompanying the poem add to its meaning in a personal way that illustrates some of the descriptions that you used.
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Review by HollyMerry
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (5.0)
I enjoyed how immersive this poem is as it transports readers to a dramatic encounter with a giant fish at sea. The use of sensory imagery and alliteration worked well in the poem at conveying the awesome size of the predatory fish and the danger the occupants of the boat felt. The allusion to Jonah worked well, as did the ending where it was revealed this was just a dream.
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Review of Half a unicorn  
for entry "Alianna" 
Review by HollyMerry
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (5.0)
This chapter was an interesting and well written read that sets up for an exciting story. I loved the idea of a horse who is part unicorn and how sadly Ali was cast out of her herd for this. Her past was captured in an intriguing way and it made me wonder if she will meet another unicorn. Her capture by humans and the revelation that the boy can hear her talk made an exciting ending.
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21
Review by HollyMerry
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (5.0)
What a fabulous story. I love Frozen and Whinne the Pooh and combining the characters worked so well here. You captured the mood of the stories and characters just right and the story was easy to picture and well written. I like how Anna and Eeyore become friends in the end as Eeyore is such a glum character but cute and it was nice that Anna appreiciated this.
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Review by HollyMerry
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (5.0)
What a fun way to write about the 20th birthday party (or twotentieth party) from the point of view of a troll who has to help organise it. Grundle was a fun character who encountered mishaps as he had to invite elves and humans when he normally prefers the company of trolls, but luckily young Bogwart helped out with his new computer. The way you captured the speech and even the spelling mistakes of the troll added an extra layer of humour to the tale.
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Review by HollyMerry
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
This story uses the mirror in a meaningful way to reflect on growing up and change and how sometimes growing up can bring negative aspects, like comparing oneself to others and not seeing yourself as beautiful however you are. I enjoyed the picture of the happy little girl who had been eating strawberries grinning in the mirror. I hope that someday the speaker of the story realises that they matter as they are and finds self-acceptance.
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Review by HollyMerry
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (5.0)
It was brilliant to see how many nursery rhyme words you managed to get into this tale. I enjoyed how it contains twists not only on the familiar tales but within the plot itself as Simon sets off looking for Mary Contrary to find information on the Weasel cafe, then turns to looking for Boy Blue, before finally arresting the farmer who overworks Boy Blue and makes him very tired. A fun read that children familiar with nursery rhymes will enjoy.
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Review of Mama Bear  
Review by HollyMerry
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (5.0)
This is an enthralling and immersive read as the first-person narrator spots a mother bear and cubs and comes to bond with her. The mix of emotions as she sees the bear: thrilled, awed by the beauty of the bear, and scared, comes across well and the understanding they built up came across naturally as they realised they were kindred spirits. I enjoyed how the human did things bears enjoy, like eating fresh berries and seeking a quieter place to walk off the trail.
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