This was so much fun! It has been years since I've done a word search. Makes me want to go to the grocery store and pick up a word search book! Thank you for the science lesson and sharing this with your WDC family
I look forward to visiting your port again.
awww...this is so sweet and loving! I am going to share this with my mother-in-law. Let her know that a laugh or cry, a cough or sigh, I am always there for her! This poem is absolutely beautiful. Perfect. Wouldn't change a thing! Thank you for sharing this with your WDC family
Quite an interesting take on a shadow. My favorite lines are..
"Art thou a coward?
Content to follow yet never lead?"
You have done a wonderful job creating a Free Verse poem! Who knew there was so much to reveal about a shadow. WOW! I enjoy reading your creations and look forward to visiting your portfolio again
Excellent imagery GerMac! The reader experiences a calmness washing over them, as your poem soaks into their soul. Awesome Free Verse poem by the way. I recently tried my hand at creating a Free Verse poem, and had lots of fun with it! Thank you for sharing this with your WDC family
As always my friend another beautiful creation! I could read a poem of yours everyday. Honestly. Your creations are that awesome! You have truly mastered Imagery that is needed in poems. Your talent blows me away. In this poem I felt like I was standing outside in the coldest weather ever, but I didn't feel the cold, it didn't bother me. I could actually feel the snowflakes placing light kisses on my cheeks, making me feel loved. This is why I am a fan of your writing
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Awesome poem Jen! Love it! The rhyming is great and the rhythm glides fantastically The mood is sad but cheerful at the sametime. Love the imagery. Even though you're inside looking out, I felt like I was standing in a forest and these beautiful blue leaves were falling all around me. I enjoy reading your creations. You ROCK lady!
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Hey Conwritedd! You have an interesting beginning here. There are 4 Elements needed(in my opinion) to create a great story! They are..Characterization/Pace/Plot/Dialogue. Are the Characters believable/Did the story move at a good pace throughout/Is it an excellent Plot, where the author has done their research/and finally was the Dialogue excellent-believable. To continue on your writing journey, I strongly recommend to all writers the following: Read/Study Creative Writing Books, English Textbooks, Composition Books, Experts in the field of writing and Authors in the field of writing. These books will help you learn what your weaknesses and strengths are in writing. Great place to find these books....the library
I really look forward to seeing you grow as a writer and I am always here if you want to talk!
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This is some deep writing Aleeza. It really is a perfect combination of sadness. Think about that for a moment..the words 'perfect' and 'sadness' together. Weird. Yet, perfect. No one wants sadness to be perfect, but you took it to another level, and I like it! The imagery is fantastic with the 'empty cup', 'inkless pen', 'wet papers', and 'folded map'. I look forward to reading more of your creations.
This is so heartbreaking and lady you leave us hanging! I wish we could know where he is at and how he is doing? I want to scream at the parents and shake them. I can't understand how a parent could abandon their own baby, just because he was a boy. I know the saying is, 'there's always two sides to every story', but darn it, the baby doesn't have a voice yet, so in this case it's just the parents side. grrrr. On another note, your poem has perfect rhyme, rhythm, mood, expression, imagery and meaning. Thank you for sharing this with the family here at WDC. I know it couldn't have been easy thing to do. (((Jen)))
Oh this is awesome! I would love to see your creation turned into a novel :) What you have written would look so good on the back of a book. The imagery, mood, expression, meaning and rhythm are perfect and I wouldn't change a thing! Please let me know if this poem gets turned into a novel.
I really like this poem! I am already wishing for summer days to get here. The rhythm glides beautifully. The rhyming is perfect in Stanzas 1&2, but in Stanza 3 none of the words rhyme. You have in Stanza 1, the words, 'night' & 'flight', and in Stanza 2, the words, 'fly' & 'sky' that rhyme, but in Stanza 3, I would either change the words, (night & eyes) to something that rhymes, or keep 'night' and get rid of 'eyes' and find a word that rhymes with 'night'. Your poem has all of the other elements that make it a great poem...mood/expression/meaning/speaker/no misspelled words. Great Job!
This is so sad, yet beautifully told. Great use of imagery makes the reader feel like they are right there in the moment, standing by the couple. Good free verse use. Good luck in Lexi's Contest. She sure has her work cut out for her with the many entries!
I love this poem and I want to help you make it ROCK! I read your Bio and saw that you appreciate helpful reviews. So here is mine :)
Let us focus 1st on Rhythm: The rhythm is stumbling here and there. Maybe have the first two lines in Stanza one flow like this...
Is it sad to think that you won't remember me,
as just another piece in your distant memory?
In the second Stanza, line one, maybe remove the word 'Although', so your first two lines flow better.
In the second Stanza lines 3&4, maybe try this instead for a better gliding rhythm...
To yell "forget me not" and grab your attention,
with words I've failed to mention.
In the third Stanza, fourth line, maybe remove the word, 'And'. Try to avoid starting sentences with the word 'and'. Also in that line you have the word 'I', 3 times. Maybe try this version for a better flow...
Don’t know how long I have till I run out of time.
In the fourth Stanza, I would remove the word 'But'. Try to avoid starting sentences with that word :) Also in the fourth stanza I would rewrite the second line. It seems to be too many 'just' words in the fourth stanza, and it kinda takes away from the message you're trying to send. Maybe rewrite the fourth line like this...
for that poem I wrote entitled, "Forget me not".
As for the rhyme, I loved it!
The meaning was easily noticeable as remembering.
The mood of your poem was sad but also hopeful.
Hopeful that your poem would live on in the one
you love.
I could easily tell who the speaker was in the poem..
the poet themselves!
Expression was handled in understood and respectful way.
I didn't discover any misspelled words.
As for the commas, periods and capitalization, I would
make quite a few changes in your poem. If you would like
help with that, please let me know. I am always here to help.
I really love your creations Tales!! That is why you are on
my Favorites List :) Keep on writing my poetry friend!!
I LOVE this poem!! The rhyming, rhythm, mood, expression, speaker in poem and imagery are perfect!! I felt like I was standing right behind you, looking in the mirror and seeing everything you saw. Creepy but wicked awesome :) I wouldn't change a thing in this poem. I can't wait to read more of your creations. I am adding you to my Favorite Author list :) Write on!
An absolutely beautiful tribute to a loved one. I am so sorry for your loss. After my 39 year old husband had a heart attack(thank goodness he survived!), it got me thinking that someday I may be all alone, and how would I go on. It is too painful so I try not to think about it too much. I honestly feel that loved ones that go before us, we will see them again someday. (((Chrisdaltro))) CONGRATS on making it into the Poetry Newsletter!!
Oh my..after reading this I can feel your pain and frustration. Makes me want to give you a hug, so I am sending you a cyber hug!! (((Novalynn))) As long as you are happy and content with what you have done in your life and the direction your life is heading, that is all that matters. I have learned that when a person starts to change in order to get another's approval, then that person becomes miserable..and for what? Nothing gets accomplished that way! Stay the way you are. Be happy. If the other person can't deal with how good and strong you are and how much you've grown, then that is THEIR CROSS TO BEAR, not yours!!! CONGRATS on making it into the Poetry Newsletter!!
In so many ways Dave this poem hits me on a personal level. My family and I experienced a Homeless Holiday during Christmas 2010, and I wouldn't wish anyone to go through something like that. I thank you so much though for bringing awareness to what homeless people go through during a lonely holiday. I also love how your creation ends on a very uplifting message :) I look forward to reading more of your creations and I am adding you to my favorites list!! CONGRATS on making it into the Poetry Newsletter!
LOL!! As I started to read the story I was thinking that it sounded like my husband years ago when he worked in the customer service department! Then I get to the end of your story and was rolling with laughter. Was not expecting that! Poor Alex Trebek..heehee. Great writing and I look forward to reading more of your creations!
This is an excellent Vignette story Michael that leaves a reader wanting more! My favorite is, "breeze trying to stroll across the boards of the porch." I felt like I was right there sitting on the porch with everyone, laughing and drinking the sweetest, coolest lemonade in the world! If I had the GP's I would be putting a Merit Badge on this for Style and giving it a Ribbon! Awesome creation.
OH MY goodness Jess! At first I was like, 'Dang that aunt is looney and I'm so glad she isn't my aunt.' As I read the fourth paragraph I was like, 'Awwww..that is so sweet of the niece.' Then BAM! I read the last line and I get chilled to the bone. I wasn't expecting that! Awesome short story and I look forward to checking out more of your creations. CONGRATS on being in the Noticing Newbies Newsletter this week!!
CONGRATS on making it into the For Authors Newsletter this week! I love your sonnet and it is definitely something I want to try to create. My favorite lines are the last two! Thank you for the inspiration. I look forward to checking out more of your creations.
I absolutely love digging through your portfolio Michaela, for your Spiritual poems are so refreshing and place a calmness over me. Stanza three has my favorite lines and will stay with me for a very long time. Thank you for sharing your creations and you know I will be back for more :)
Thank you Krystle for sharing your story. I have a 17yr old daughter who would rather be social on WHATSAPP,TWITTER,FACEBOOK,INSTAGRAM,with her reading and writing groups than deal with fake high school friends, who live to gossip and back stab each other every chance they get. Between the ages of 13-18, are tough years for any young female and male. From what I have read your childhood was an emotional roller coaster and has in some way scarred you. Now you are in your teens and I would love to tell you that it gets better instantly, but there is much to take place for a young woman between 16-18! You will have more emotional/mental draining moments like learning to drive, deciding what high school courses to take to help you prepare for college(if that's on your agenda after HS graduation), taking the PSAT and SAT. Finding love? Going to the Prom? Although my daughter has informed me that high school boys are very immature so she's waiting to see what she finds at college, but she isn't holding her breath :) I encourage you to keep writing in your diary and I agree that paper has all the patience in the world! I want to give you something to think about that was said to me when I was 16(hating my parents(not saying you hate yours)and feeling like no one understood what I was going through)..someone told me that my parents were my age at one time, 16 like me, they weren't always 'A Parent', they were teenagers and young adults before coming parents and probably felt the same way I did, not liking their parents, upset or mad at them and thinking they couldn't possibly understand what they were going through. That was MY wake up call at 16 and I approached my parents asking them to share their emotional and mental frustrations they had when they were 16, 17 and 18, because I felt no one understood the life changes I was going through. My parents first reaction was SHOCK! LOL. They were shocked that their 16yr old daughter was talking to them, let alone I was sitting in the same room as them :) I am not going to kid ya and say everything was hunky dory after that day BUT I got the relationship I craved to have with my mom and dad. Things were 80% better after about 6 months. Almost gone were the slamming of the doors and fighting. What I cherished the most was that I had 2 people that loved me unconditionally and were always there when I needed someone to talk to. Overall they gave great advice, which once in awhile I ignored, because at 16 I felt like I knew it all and what was best for me. As you see I had to work on my attitude. Now I have an 18yr old son and 17yr old daughter and I have tried my best to make sure they know I got their back and they can talk to me about anything. They always tell me I am the coolest mom around, so I guess I did something right :) If you want to talk Krystle, you can send me a private message anytime. I hope what I have written to you helps bring you comfort in knowing that you are NOT ALONE! Hugs
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