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1,856 Public Reviews Given
1,856 Total Reviews Given
Public Reviews
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126
126
for entry "Haiku: "Deer"" 
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (4.0)
I'm a bit confused. You say 'deerly' departed and you have "horse" in quotes. So right or wrong I'm thinking you mean the deer.

Are you sure it's night? Could it be the very early morning with the sun barely lighting the morning sky?

I know you are well known for your Haikus, however maybe this needs to be a double haiku, just so some slightly dense people like me could have a clue?

Where are you living that you have flowers already? I have hail and sleet, Washington state, on the coast. I have some stuff sprouting on the porch, but no flowers yet.

I'll have to go back and read all of your intro and maybe that will help. lol

Use fishing line to tie to some posts. They can't see it and neither can everyone else, at least not to the extent of ruining the view. The deer will be afraid of tangling in what they can't see. I learned that a couple of months ago and bought the line yesterday.

Thanks for the read. Nice to know we share a common interest.
love, LinnAnn

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127
127
Review of Pants on Fire  
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
The directions here say 'be respectful' but that makes it a bit hard. I can be respectful to YOU, just not to or about that maniac Trump. How on earth so many could vote for such a sleaze ball I have no idea. I misspelled sleaze ball and spell check had it. Cracked me up. How helpful!

Okay enough of the rant. I find your poem at the same time funny and humorous, and also infuriating that it could fit so aptly the president of the United States of America.

'my detractors' HA. I don't see them as such, more like trying to set that big blowhard on the right tract. I'm just glad I'm not part of 'the base'.

Norway wouldn't have anything to do with Trump. That cracked me up too.

You did a really great job on this poem. So well with so few words. You even got Norway to fit in there with such aplomb. Good job. I'd have laughed if I wasn't so put out at the jerk. He's gonna start WW3. Bad enough Kim, now he's got half the world mad at us. How you came of with that very aptly put....stupid brain damage, ...can't remember the type of poem, but you did great.

Love, LinnAnn
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128
128
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (4.5)
I thought this poem would be like the kind of directions the letter writer showed in the directions. It wasn't, which made me smile. Sorry but it would have been harder to count the lines and make sure the format was followed.

I enjoyed your poem. I got a bit confused because I wasn't sure if you were being metaphorical. I've run a writing group through the prison and I've had friends with cancer. I wasn't sure on the prison but then you talked about 'free to roam'. So out of curiosity, do you have cancer and what is your prison?

I enjoyed the poem, you drew me in and held my attention. You made me think and ponder and that is always a good thing to me, to be able to influence someones thought processes.

Thanks so much for sharing.
Merry Christmas

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129
129
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (4.5)
This is the first long poem of yours I've ever reviewed. I read it through once and did get hung up briefly on a couple of spots with the rhythm. Not a problem,I figured out the pronunciation fine.

I really liked the premise and the story you tell to get your point across. You even brought in King George. 'Papa' made me chuckle.by

'freedom in the hedge.'-I didn't get this part.
'Release the grip that Freedom sing'-I didn't get this line either. It made sense to me to have a comma after 'grip' and instead of 'that' put in 'let freedom sing.' However that may not be the message you wanted.

The Pond,... If steely fingers--If the 'if' were not capitalized I would have realized it was a wrap around sentence.



I thought a comma after estranged would have helped me read it better.

So if you could explain the parts I didn't understand I'd appreciate it.

I like the 'rising star' at the end. Love it.

Nicely done, and again, thanks for sharing your work.
love,LinnAnn
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130
130
Review of The Takers  
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (4.5)
Robert, I was very moved by your poem. It touched my heart. As a Christian, I see the gospel and the 'circle of time' as they call it now.

Your first line at first made me think of a science fiction movie. I saw space ships heading out like a plague to infest other planets of who knows where. Then I thought of the garden of Eden and how we left perfection and started the ruin of out planet.

"our parchments been inked" made me think of a court order or finding. It's done and that's all she wrote. Very sad.

"The world will breathe a sigh" A sigh of relief? A time to refresh, to start over.


It says in scripture that the earth will be changed. I think you told he story very well here. Well done. Thanks so much for sharing with us.
Love, LinnAnn
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131
131
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (4.5)
Were you not the one to set up the online classes? Do you have to grade them and still give more classes. That part was unclear. I do get involved with your posts. *Rolling*

I'm sorry you had such an exhausting trip. So, how did it go trying to answer their problems when they had new and antiquated stuff? Were there questions you couldn't answer because you didn't have schematics? Did they feel like they got something out of all your hard work and traveling?

Do you report to higher ups and will they listen to your suggestions? I sure hope so. All that travel and exhaustion for the class to not be what they needed is frustrating.
love, LinnAnn

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132
132
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (4.0)
I thought this very clear except the---
2. Using "Invalid Item"  or "Invalid Entry" , post your Prep Contest Round submission. (R)
--
I'm not a newbie but that stuff always confuses me. Maybe not x's but a fake demo?

You've worked with me for years and years and still those item or bitem or whatever they're called still confuse the heck out of me.

Maybe it's because I'm not a newbie anymore but each section you have up above seems clear. You've even underlined the place to submit the prep assignments. It does say first, which might make someone think there is a different place to log other assignments.
love, LinnAnn
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133
133
Review of White Water Life  
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (5.0)
Your poem caught my attention and drew me in and held my attention. Your first sentence, or two lines were great. I used to go tubing down the Salt and the Verde in Arizona. I've never white water rafted, but I've white water tubing. Not the same I know, but similar enough for me to really get off on your poem. You give a good mental image, maybe because I've seen it, but you did well.

I do like the repetitive form. It's a short pause to think and feel.

I love all the verses but the last one has an extra pull of feeling. Different word grouping, 'lifetime's symphony' 'I am strong'. You show us that strength shows not in just the ability to do the skill, but the emotion that emanates from it.

Thanks so much for sharing this with us.
love, LinnAnn

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134
134
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (4.5)
I told someone before you that beauty can come out of something so drastic and deadly. Your poem is a great example of beauty out of ugly.

I really liked the third line about her drinking the bay. After seeing those pictures of the water just gone, people walking where there used to be twenty feet of water...scared me. I thought the water might come crashing back and drown them. You inspired very vivid mental pictures.

I also loved the way you worked in and actually rhymed 'barge'. That was great!

I'm not sure what you meant by the weather folk stirring the pot. Would you be so kind and explain that to me?

While you're explaining, tell me what you mean by the 'gnomes' in the last verse? Even though there were a couple spots I didn't understand, I really liked this poem. Thanks for sharing.
Love, LinnAnn
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135
135
for entry "Haiku: "Hurricane"" 
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (4.0)
Okay, now I know haiku follows a pattern and you did stick to it well. HOWEVER...the way you have this one made me laugh and I don't think that was the effect you were going for. lol

The first line is just fine. huge body of wind. I'm thinking hurricane or tornado, so that starts off really well.

I like the next line. The 'tummy' full of furry and rage. Cute using 'tummy' I have to give it to you I thought tummy was very cute. Stomach wouldn't have sounded good either but such a cute word as tummy for such a destructive force was just incongruent.

The 'lands without a thought' is what made me laugh. at first I thought the land had no thought. then realized it was the storm landing without a thought...and you're right. But the storm only had a tummy. Couldn't be too bad. I'm sorry but it's still making me chuckle.
Thanks for sharing. I've been pretty down, so I needed the laugh.
love, LinnAnn

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136
136
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: 13+ | (3.5)
This is a tired and weary traveler.
Your second verse switches rhyming patterns so it threw me off. It yanked me right out of the emotional setting you made, and made well.

This is just a suggestion, but if you took the last line 'sleeps on the ground' and slid it into the second lines place, the pattern would work, and the verse still make sense. It's just a thought.

I wondered about the food wrapped in foil. Was it fast food, food from a soup kitchen? You drew me in and made me want to know more about this traveler. Good for you.
Thanks so much for sharing this with us.
love LinnAnn

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137
137
Review of Once we were Gods  
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (4.5)
Oh, that is just too, too sad. For you to fall from your throne when he was five? That is just dreadful. It must have been later? Who would disillusion a child at such a tender age? Who could be so cruel to take away a hero?

You started out well, you really put in the whole riding on a star persona. Then when you said five, I was brought up short, really abruptly. "Out of my way old man." That wasn't five, maybe thirteen? Usually they start to change around then. Between this and the other poem, it's so sad. Do you have grandkids yet? You can regain your crown and glory with grand kids...until their parents wreck it.

Well done. Thanks for sharing.
love, LinnAnn

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138
138
for entry "Haiku: "Peach"" 
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (4.5)
I used the fruit of my state of Washington, flavored with the fruit of your state of Georgia yesterday in my oatmeal. Fake Georgia peaches are better than none. I know not near enough to the real thing, but a hint at a memory. Your Haiku reminded me of when fruit was picked ripe, cushioned during transit.

I do love how you can pull up whole chunks of the past in such a very few words. What made you think of peaches today? Did you have a peach smoothy. I made a couple last week...or the week before. Even if I don't comment on them all or review them, I do read them.
thanks for sharing
love, LinnAnn
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139
139
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (4.5)
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Aww Jay. This was very touching and heart warming. So many people do not have the wisdom you just displayed in your writing here. I would rather have you as you are, and here and alive, rather than be famous and us grieving over your demise. That would be tragic. So many 'greats' have left us in that manner and it's so sad that they could not overcome their demons.

You get your kudos in your life and from people that are important to you. That means so much more than polite clapping from a stranger, don't you think?

You mentioned your wife and daughter are getting famous locally, I expect to see some writing about that. Feel free to let me know when you do write about it. Thanks for sharing this with us.
love, LinnAnn

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140
140
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (4.5)
I love your title. It really set the tone for the rest of the poem.

Your second verse is really great to introduce the way people often think and the new idea of the happiness of the season.

'With reds and golds, and joyful sound'- because the other two words ended in 's' I at first thought 'sound' should too. Then I realized the rhyming word 'around' didn't...so I guess your way is fine. lol However, there are more than one sound in the trees, or forests. lol The 'singing in the trees' really appealed to me. I also hear the music nature makes.

The last verse is delightful. So fresh and full of new beginnings and hopeful.

Thanks so much for sharing this with us.
love, LinnAnn

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141
Review of Neshaminy Creek  
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (4.0)
Some of this made me go back and reread because the rhythm was off. The syllable count was off. If you count the syllables in each first line for example you will see what I mean.

Your first verse was engaging, and I loved the 'circus tent of trees'. Nicely said.

I wondered if the creepers and cobwebs were from you not going there in a long time. The 'like turnstiles to puberty' made me wonder that. Again, great ending line for the verse.

The 'braless blonde' threw me out of the poem. It just didn't fit with the rest of the atmosphere.

'A circle marks the limb' do you mean a sawed off branch? Total bummer someone took the swing. I felt it ended to abruptly. That just may be me, but it is an ending. Childhood does that. It ends.

Thank you so much for sharing this with us.
love, LinnAnn

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142
142
for entry "Amarillo Again!" 
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (4.0)
I always love reading your posts about your trips. I always learn something and I always find out about new foods. lol

*Music2* Amarillo by morning.*Music2*

I'm not sure, but maybe you should have started with the second paragraph. I have to admit I got a bit lost there.

Telling us about all the delays and then the lucky break was a good way to evoke empathy.

Classes the won't use? That sounds like a great waste of time and money not only on their part, but time on your part. I'm not sure you even got to see your brother. You left us hanging on that part.

What is a street taco? What were the other ingredients in the catfish and the crawdad tacos?

Thanks for the Billy the Kid info. I didn't know he had a different name other than the Bonney name. Thanks again for the history lesson.

Thanks for sharing.
love, LinnAnn
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143
143
for entry "Mayday at Midway!" 
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (4.5)
I'd like to know what you mean by 'really old'. lol I'm sure it's not as old as I'm thinking, like in the sixties. lol

It was nice you reassured people that it wasn't as bad as many have been lead to believe. Nice touch on the government and the union issues. We get a little bit of everything. I like that.

Telling us about the food was also nice, and you even went the extra mile and included not only the address but the email of each place as well. You are so thoughtful and informative. I like how you even mention the food wasn't at fault, just not your cup of tea. Again, thoughtful. Thanks for sharing.
love, LinnAnn
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144
144
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: ASR | (4.5)
You totally cracked me up. I have to ask, is the name real? Did you know the person? When you say young, how young did you mean? I know they let younger people than we do, in bars over there. However some mothers never let up on the mothering. lol

You hung a carrot in front of us and said, 'the gnome'. Was this a short person or a gnome the teen swiped off a lawn or what? It's so hard to give the big picture in so few words. However I got great mental picture when you told us the mother was there with her shillelagh. I could picture a little woman in a gingham dress, over weight, and shaking the shillelagh in the air over her head. Thanks for sharing, and the laugh.

Love, LinnAnn
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145
145
Review of Pants on Fire  
for entry "Loyalty" 
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
Its the weirdest thing that you wrote this poem. I know where you are coming from just because of my dream. I don't have cable so I didn't get to see the address you mention. However, your poem gave me a perfect view. It actually made me shudder. Did he actually say he wanted/demanded loyalty above oaths to country? Your poem drew me in and held me in rapt attention. I'm old enough to remember the movies and war clips even though the war was over before I came along.
Seig Trump in bold was a nice touch. Very good!
AND YOU GOT IT ALL TO RHYME. I'm impressed.
Love, LinnAnn

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146
146
Review of A Pastoral  
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (4.0)
I think the first verse you might want to consider breaking the long lines into two lines, possible at the commas. Just a suggestion. It is your work.

Corn husks inanimate? lol no breeze. That is the 'normal' but you got my attention with their coarseness and no breeze. Then you get the breeze, and very nicely. Whispering wind goes well together.

That whole part --trees gently braid the hair of girls --I love it!

wispy tunes of leaves--I love that too

The second verse seems to not fit too well. The fence part threw me and then slipped into stars. I just didn't get it. Would a transition line help?

It seems like someone died, and that is sad. Reminds me of my dad. He taught me about the stars.

You did move me. Thanks so much for sharing wit us.

Love, LinnAnn
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147
147
for entry "Haiku: "Moon"" 
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (4.0)
Maybe I'm tired, but I had to read it three times. Duh then I remembered your 'moonday'. Aha! lol

Your first line gave me a mixed mental picture. When you started out with 'mirror' I thought of a lake, calm and still, reflecting the moons bright light. I love those pictures. On Face Book is a group, 'You know you're from Anacortes when' and there are several photographers, you might like the pictures there.

Thanks for the reeducation. I'd forgotten the origin and the namesake. lol

Yes the moon is OFTEN white and bright each month. I remember once my daughter called all freaked out because it was 'blood red' helped get out the 'call to repentance'. lol

You did well with the imagery and getting me to thinking. Thanks.
love, LinnAnn
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148
148
Review of Twister  
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (4.5)
I saw nothing to correct, not a thing. Each sentence pulled me in further and further. Each sentence another image of grief and chaos.

You mention the fear...then I thought of the Storm Chasers. Do they think they are invincible?

Her hair twists into destructiveness--This is an outrageously cool imagery. I love it!

Her hands rip and tear into nothingness-This sounds like her hand rip and tear until they are nothingness. Would it be feasible to say a word that tells what she is ripping? It's just a thought.

Though many prepare, or try to, you are right. Sometimes it's not much good. I did see a lone house in Texas that survived Katrina. He'd spent a fortune to make sure it would. All around them was lumber from disintegrated homes.

This was great. Thanks for sharing.
Love, LinnAnn
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149
Review of Frogs and toads.  
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (4.0)
There are a few things, little ones, I suggest fixing. Nothing too big. However, your first sentence isn't complete. It is good to know what? You don't tell us.

'since I was this knee-high-old' --Might want to consider taking out 'this'.

I'm not sure the bed wetting stories fit in this as it's about make believe/fairy stories. It just doesn't fit.

I love the not listening and ate too late. cracked me up.

I also like the bits of rhyming words, makes it more fluid and just plain cool. Night, light, delight for example.

I really cracked up with your still here, no money and no job. What a great ending.
Thanks for sharing this.
love, LinnAnn
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150
for entry "Haiku: "Fireflies"" 
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (4.5)
I have to admit, I never thought of those little flashing lights as 'bursts'. Maybe It's from too many movies with explosions. lol I think more of them as twinkle lights, like at Christmas. You were unique in your description so that was good. You don't want to be like everyone else, do you? lol

Your 'show the way' reminds me of fantasy movies and books. You never know what is at the end of that path.

Whimsied came up with a red line under it...should it be whimsical? No red line came up under that word.

This was a cute little poem and brought back good memories. I haven't seen fireflies in years.

Thank you so much for sharing this with us.
love, LinnAnn

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