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76
76
Review of Snowflake  
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (4.5)
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SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  (E)
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#1384154 by Simply Positive


Hello Cass--Spring Spirit

Congratulations on having this poem featured in the poetry newsletter.

You use some wonderful descriptive phrases to bring this winter scene to life.

I found the poem a little uneven in its pace -- probably due to the large variance in line length with a couple of particularly long lines.

Otherwise I found this a vivid, beautiful poem and very much enjoyed reading it.

Write on!

Best wishes,
Mark


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77
77
Review of Snowflakes  
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (4.5)
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SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  (E)
A group whose mission is to spread positivity.
#1384154 by Simply Positive


Hello Mariposa

This is a lovely little haiku about a snowflake -- a fine example of the form. You've kept it traditional by writing about nature. I like the softness of all the s sounds in this poem -- very much representing the softness of snow.

You've chosen your words well and this short poem flows nicely. A joy to read.

Congratulations on having this featured in the poetry newsletter.

Keep writing!


Best wishes,
Mark


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78
78
Review of Carpé Díem  
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (5.0)
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SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  (E)
A group whose mission is to spread positivity.
#1384154 by Simply Positive


Hello Prissy Lou

I love this poem! Congratulations on having it featured in the current poetry newsletter.

It put a big smile on my face. A really positive, inspirational piece of work.

I love how you've taken the phrase 'carpe diem' and used it to spin a web of dreams. At first the reader doesn't know how much of what is written is real and how much dream but that's very effective and I love the last line. A strong ending to a very enjoyable poem.

Thanks for sharing your work.

Best wishes,
Mark


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79
79
Review of Without Reason  
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (5.0)
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SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  (E)
A group whose mission is to spread positivity.
#1384154 by Simply Positive


Hello Mandie

This poem is a wonderful outpouring of love. Very emotional but at the same time nicely constrained within the form of the poem.

Isn't it great when a film touches us emotionally in this way. I really love 'Patch Adams' myself. It's been a long time since I've watched it and your poem has inspired me to see it again real soon.

I strongly agree with the sentiment of your last line. We are made to love.

Congratulations on having this poem featured in the poetry newsletter this week.

Best wishes,
Mark


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80
80
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (5.0)
This is a review for

GROUP
SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  (E)
A group whose mission is to spread positivity.
#1384154 by Simply Positive


Hello Jennifer Jaqua

With its extra long lines, this has the feel of a prose poem. Yet the poem flows smoothly and you do a fantastic job of creating a stream of consciousness. I think many readers who have spent nights awake in restless introspection will really relate to the content of the poem. I for one can really relate.

I think this is a thoughtful, intelligent poem that's flawlessly constructed with no wastage. I have no suggestions for change and no reservations in giving this a full 5 stars.

My favourite part of the poem:
'When I should have called out to Opportunity, I turned and walked toward Shame.'

Really love that.

Keep writing!


Best wishes,
Mark


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81
81
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
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GROUP
SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  (E)
A group whose mission is to spread positivity.
#1384154 by Simply Positive


Hello Rhyssa

This is a fantastic narrative poem that put a smile on my face. It really turns the fairytale of the frog prince on its head. Very nice twist at the end. Although a fantasy poem it shows real insight into the father/daughter relationship.

A joy to read. I loved it. No hesitation in giving five stars.

Best wishes,
Mark


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82
82
Review of The Shore  
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (5.0)
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SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  (E)
A group whose mission is to spread positivity.
#1384154 by Simply Positive


Hello Sarah Rae

This is a gorgeous little haiku that really put a smile on my face. You've chosen your words carefully and paint a vivid picture. I love the aliteration of the 's'. That works well.

I also love the idea of 'Nature's... lullaby'. Beautiful.

Great poem and fine example of the form.

No errors.
No hesitation in awarding this 5 stars.

Best wishes,
Mark


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83
83
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (5.0)
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SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  (E)
A group whose mission is to spread positivity.
#1384154 by Simply Positive


Hello Dance-Monkey ~ We've got this

It's a natural part of the human condition to need to be of some importance to others, to be noticed, to matter and for our lives to have some meaning. Your poem explores this beautifully and I'm sure many readers will be able to relate.

You've chosen your words with care. The poem flows well and has a very polished feel. You have a good ear for how the words work together. I especially love all the 's' sounds in your first stanza. I think this poem would be really effective read aloud.

Couldn't spot any errors. I like how the poem connects with your handle as well.

Great job. Keep writing!

Best wishes,
Mark


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84
84
Review of How Now Sister?  
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
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#1384154 by Simply Positive


Hello LifeLibertyandJusticeforAll

This is a haunting, atmospheric little poem. Your use of short lines gives the poem a dynamic pace. You demonstrate a good ear for how words work together and the poem has a smooth, polished feel. I like your use of alliteration with 'teased / taunted'.

I look forward to reading more of your work.

Best wishes,
Mark


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85
85
Review of Fire  
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (4.0)
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#1384154 by Simply Positive


Hello Metamorphosis

This is a thoughtful little poem about fire that reflects both its danger and beauty. You use rhyme well. However I found the pace a little uneven.

I think you could reduce the number of commas in the poem without losing any sense of meaning, and this would help speed up the flow and rhythm of the poem. I particularly think the comma in the last line of your first stanza could go. Of course this is just my personal opinion.

Write on!

Best wishes,
Mark


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86
86
Review of LITTLE WHITE MOTH  
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (4.5)
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SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  (E)
A group whose mission is to spread positivity.
#1384154 by Simply Positive


Hello Meg

I love your choice of subject matter for this. You choose words of warning to a moth as a way to express universal human truth - people are often attracted to the greener grass of the other side (looking at what we haven't got rather than what we have) but don't see the perils and pitfalls that may make them worse off if they actually get to that other side. Very thought provoking.

I love how the poem's narrator addresses the moth so directly and personally.

The poem flows well over all and you make good use of rhyme.

I have some small suggestions. Of course it's up to you if you agree with them or choose to use them:

1) In the last line of your first stanza I think 'leave' should be 'leaves' as it connects with 'place' in line two (places... leave us no option, a place... leaves us no option).

2) In the same line (line 4) I think 'victim to our foes' would work better as 'victim of our foes' as 'victim of' is more commonly used.

3) In the first line of your last stanza you write, 'but so are they, too,'. One or the other of 'so' and 'too' is totally redundant here in my opinion as they are saying the same thing. In order to keep the rhyme I think the easiest remedy would be to change to 'but they are too,'.

Hope that helps. Thanks for a great read.

Best wishes,
Mark


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87
87
Review of The Other Side  
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (5.0)
This is a review for

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A group whose mission is to spread positivity.
#1384154 by Simply Positive


Hello Brian K Compton, Machinehead

This is a wonderful little poem which made me smile with recognition. The whole poem works as a wonderful analogy, albeit one tinged with sadness. I think many readers will be able to relate to the feeling of being forever on the wrong side of the glass away from the light. The grass is always greener... as the saying goes.

Every word in your poem works. You capture a great deal in few words. The poem flows well. Personally I would remove the commas after 'life' and 'window' but that's just a stylistic choice and I still have no hesitation in giving this a five star rating.

It was a pleasure to read your poem. Thanks for sharing your work.

Write on!

Best wishes,
Mark


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88
88
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (5.0)
This is a review for

GROUP
SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  (E)
A group whose mission is to spread positivity.
#1384154 by Simply Positive


Hello Moarzjasac

This is a very sweet, uplifting poem in which a grandfather attempts an answer to a thought-provoking question from his grandchild.

The poem's simple language and strong rhyme make it a very effective poem for children in my opinion. It flows well, has good rhythm and would work just as well read aloud as it does on the page/screen.

Nice job.

Keep writing!

Best wishes,
Mark


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89
89
Review of One Little Boy  
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (4.5)
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A group whose mission is to spread positivity.
#1384154 by Simply Positive


Hello Linda

This is a really sweet, endearing little poem for your nephew. If you can't be sentimental towards nephews and nieces who can you be.

Your use of short lines give this a good flow, and I love how you rhyme hugs and bugs *Bigsmile*

Write on!

Best wishes,
Mark


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90
90
Review of once was lost  
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: 18+ | (5.0)
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#1384154 by Simply Positive


Hello tayla

I love this poem. It's very emotive and personal, and not afraid to look at life as it happens in the shadows. A poem of discovery that I'm sure many readers will relate to, if not in the specific details then in the journey to self-discovery and how we sometimes need someone else to help make that happen.

Your repeating line, 'I got lost searching for myself' is very effective. I also love the idea of 'deafening whispers', maybe partly because I used a similar idea in my poem, 'Silent Kisses, Shouted Whispers' *Wink*

The last three lines of this poem make for a wonderful ending. Great title too.

Write on!
Best wishes,
Mark


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91
91
Review of Singing Stones  
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | N/A (Review only item.)
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SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  (E)
A group whose mission is to spread positivity.
#1384154 by Simply Positive


Hello turtlemoon-dohi

This is a beautiful, uplifting poem about the gift of stones which keep memories alive. The way the poem is set out is eye-catching. It's well edited and flows well. I like how the last few lines of the poem echo the beginning without repeating.

Great job with this.

Write on!

Best wishes,
Mark


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92
92
Review of Depression  
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (5.0)
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#1384154 by Simply Positive


Hello AmeliaHelen

As someone who has suffered from depression myself I can really relate to this poem and I'm sure many other readers will also. You've captured some dark and powerful experiences in your words. I especially like the description of being blinded by the shadow.

You use rhyme to excellent effect and your words flow well. I have no suggestions for improvement hence the top rating.

Thanks for sharing your work.

Write on!

Best wishes,
Mark


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93
93
Review of Frozen  
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (4.5)
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A group whose mission is to spread positivity.
#1384154 by Simply Positive


Hello April Desiree-I'm back!

This is a lovely example of the haiku form. By writing of nature you have kept true to the haiku tradition. I love the picture you've put with this poem. You well capture the moment of the sun coming out. Personally I think 'shine down' at the end lacks a little something & wasn't quite dynamic enough for me.

Overall though I was impressed with this. Congratulations on having it featured in this week's poetry newsletter.

Keep writing!

Best wishes,
Mark


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94
94
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (5.0)
This is a review for

GROUP
SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  (E)
A group whose mission is to spread positivity.
#1384154 by Simply Positive


Hello Prosperous Snow celebrating

This is a wonderful, magical poem about ornaments on a christmas tree and the memories they evoke.

I love the image of the little snowman trying to dance off the tree.

I'm a long time fan of the film, 'It's a Wonderful Life' too and your reference to it has made me want to go and watch it all over again.

The way this poem is laid out is eye-catching and the words flow beautifully.

No hesitation in giving this a full 5 stars. Congratulations on having it featured in this week's poetry newsletter.

Write on!

Best wishes,
Mark


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95
95
Review of Sky  
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (4.5)
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A group whose mission is to spread positivity.
#1384154 by Simply Positive


Hello Marcos

This is a powerful, atmospheric little poem that really evokes a mood. It certainly gives fresh meaning to living under a black cloud. I think anyone who has ever suffered from depression will particularly relate to your words.

Your repeating line is very good and the poem flows well.

Apt title too.

Keep writing!

Best wishes,
Mark


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96
96
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (4.5)
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A group whose mission is to spread positivity.
#1384154 by Simply Positive


Hello Inky

This is a really good take on the overcrowded genre of love poetry. I really like how you've used cliche (which is often a flaw in this area of poetry) to positive effect both in the poem and in the title.

I also like how you've used the poem to look at different stages of a relationship. My favourite stanza is your last one which looks back once the relationship is over. I'm sure many readers will be able to relate to what you've written here. I know I can.

For non-rhyming poetry this flows very well overalll. That said I found the pace a little uneven around the longest line in the last stanza. This may have just been how I was reading it though.

Write on!

Best wishes,
Mark


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97
97
Review of My Mind is Broken  
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (4.5)
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A group whose mission is to spread positivity.
#1384154 by Simply Positive


Hello K. A. Matthews

I'm sure many readers here on WDC will recognise within this poem their own experiences of having lost their muse. I know I do.

Although your use of rhyme is rather erratic I still think the poem flows well with a good pace.

The poem really illustrates how important the creative muse is to us writers, and how the loss of it can leave us frustrated and broken and even sick. With this in mind I think your title is well chosen.

Thanks for sharing your work.


Best wishes,
Mark


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98
98
Review of Wilted Flowers  
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (4.5)
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SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  (E)
A group whose mission is to spread positivity.
#1384154 by Simply Positive


Hello Julia Layla

This is a beautiful poem tinged with melancholy. It's possible to read it two ways. Firstly, as a straightfoward (and very effective) description of flowers wilting in a vase. Secondly, as your description suggests, it can be taken as an allegory about the human condition and how people can wilt too.

Your descriptive language really paints a vivid picture in the reader's mind.

You have one line in the poem which is quite a lot longer than the rest. I found this broke up the rhythm a little. I think the line could be shortened without losing any meaning simply by replacing 'they used to have' with 'they had'.

Overall I think this is a very good poem. Thanks for sharing your work.

Keep writing!

Best wishes,
Mark


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99
99
Review of Writing  
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Rated: E | (5.0)
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SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  (E)
A group whose mission is to spread positivity.
#1384154 by Simply Positive


Hello Samberine Everose

This little poem is really uplifting and put a smile on my face. I'm sure any writer reading your words will be able to relate. I know I can. I love the image of a pen gently weeping. I also think the juxtaposition of 'joy' and 'weep' in your last two lines is very effective. While it's certainly possible to weep for joy, the word weep also opens the door on the possibility of writing from other, more negative, emotions.

This poem was a pleasure to read and I'm happy to give it a full five star rating.

Write on!

Best wishes,
Mark


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100
100
Review of Love's Creation  
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (5.0)
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SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  (E)
A group whose mission is to spread positivity.
#1384154 by Simply Positive


Hello Isola Bertolucci

This short poem is a very satisfying, positive read. You choose your words very carefully and convey a lot of meaning in very few words. Your title is excellent and the chosen genres all appropriate to the subject matter.

Although not a parent myself, I can imagine that anyone who is will be able to relate to this poem. As I read it I could really feel the emotion behind the words.

I have no suggestions for improvement as I think this is a perfect little poem just as it is... hence the full five star rating.

Keep writing!

Best wishes,
Mark


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