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1,729 Public Reviews Given
1,730 Total Reviews Given
Public Reviews
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201
for entry "April Fool" 
Review by Spring in my Sox
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  
Rated: 18+ | (5.0)
This is a slightly surreal almost nonsensical poem that makes deep sense, resonating with the child in me. I loved the rain but hated being cold and wet in it. I used to make tents out of scraps of garbage bags just so I could stay out and play in the mud longer without getting cold. Childhood makes things like that less an inconvenience and more of an adventure. I know now I just get cranky when I have to splash through a puddle or get mud on my hands. What went wrong with my life? How did my priorities get so totally ass backward?
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Review by Spring in my Sox
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  
Rated: E | (5.0)
this is a beautiful poem I wish I wrote. I definitely remember feeling this way when I was younger. The person I imagined was nothing like the one I ultimately found but it really is hard to say what the heart wants when you are that young. I really love the wording and the repetition of you take my breath away.

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Review of How Could You?  
Review by Spring in my Sox
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  
Rated: E | (5.0)
At least you didn't going into a rant about how death was about to part something. Lorana Bobbit? That is who I think of when I think infidelity. She is my hero. Yet she's a criminal. At one point adultery was a crime, that could be punished with the force of law. Men got off of murder charges because of it. Sorry I don't think someone reacting to that kind of betrayal should have to be treated as though they are completely sane. This poem descends into this kind of insanity.


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204
Review of Psycho Fable  
Review by Spring in my Sox
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  
Rated: E | (5.0)
That is a seriously intimidating look. I wouldn't want to be that cat. That look says if you are a cat I will chase you, and catch you, and make you wish you were a dog. But she doesn't look like she would hurt it badly. Just enthusiasm could get away with her. Sooo cute.


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205
Review by Spring in my Sox
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  
Rated: E | (5.0)
I had a wiener dog who went through this on a yearly basis. She had a stuffed bunnie named Bunny that was her "puppy." She wouldn't let anyone else mess with Bunny. SHe would take bunnie to the water bowl and saw to it getting drinks, she would take it to the food bowl to feed it and she took it to the potty pad so it could do what it needed to, then she would clean its bottom parts. SHe was dead serious about it.

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Review of Magic Pie  
Review by Spring in my Sox
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
Awe how cute. I like the idea of a magical world. I like the way this is a modern day fantasy story. What it would be like if magic really existed for everyone. The idea of there being different times in a child's life as they are learning that they are more dangerous than others is a cool idea.


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Review of Raising Rabbits  
Review by Spring in my Sox
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
The last line is absolutely perfect!!! It is hilarious. It reminds me of conversations I have had with my wife, about cats. We had an addiction to abandoned kittens. Fortunately, we have gotten over it. They didn't sit well with our chihuahuas. Imagine telling a chihuahua that they have to wait for your lap because you're bottle-feeding another stupid kitten.


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Review of Ghost Hunting  
Review by Spring in my Sox
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  
Rated: 18+ | (5.0)
Scary. Nice slow lead up to the climax I love the last line from the ghosts. I was wondering if they were going to try to keep her as the seventh ghost. It sounds like they might have wanted to. The last paragraph wrap up seems a bit abrupt and I question whether it is necessary. It would be scarier if she just dropped the phone and that was where you left it.


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Review of Greeting the Ex-  
Review by Spring in my Sox
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
Ooh that sounds like a really crappy relationship. This is a great suspenseful story. The weird thing is that all the real action is taking place outside of the story yet it is still satisfying. Is Fritzie a chihuahua that would be really scary I have seen chihuahuas go psycho on invaders.

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210
Review by Spring in my Sox
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
This is a good short story, I like that Jasper isn't what people think of as the perfect emblem of physical prowess and yet he appears to be the future architect of the revolution. I would love to read a sequel where the kid is JohnConnoring the invaders. I could see that being so awesome.


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211
Review by Spring in my Sox
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  
Rated: 18+ | (5.0)
I really like the new world order as dictated by you. I wish it were practical. Because I said so rarely works even for mothers. Then there are the men who would be unhappy listening to a woman in charge you will need to find some way of chemically neutering their stubborn-ass attitudes.

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Review of Ode to Lesia  
Review by Spring in my Sox
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  
Rated: E | (5.0)
That is so sweet. It almost made me cry especially the last sentence. You showed a lot of her character in this but also told a lot. It is short but sweet. It seems fairly balanced. I think she would be proud of what you wrote about her. The question is are you satisfied with it. This is a part of your goodbye to her and you want to make sure you say everything you need to.
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Review by Spring in my Sox
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  
Rated: ASR | (5.0)
A frisbee? The twins want a Frisbee? Well it is better throwing that around than each other. I can't quite see toothless laughing though. I try but mostly see him blinking mirthfully. They will get their frisbee in the end. he could try very thin metal. a pie plate flys after all.
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Review of The Hand Tree  
Review by Spring in my Sox
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  
Rated: E | (5.0)
Ooooh, creepy. Love the dialect. Love that you didn't set it in a distant mythical past. Your use of the truck made it modern. I can just see the old junker flying down the hill at a dangerous speed. I can see the young one never talking about it to anyone. Cool story.
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Review by Spring in my Sox
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  
Rated: 18+ | (5.0)
He is worried about the sinfulness of a movie that he is going to watch anyway? And then because he can't get in he gets S#%^%$faced and doesn't consider that has anything to do with sinfulness. I am not saying god forbids alcohol but what I am saying is that he doesn't seem to favor drunkenness. This is a very confusing story. I hate the reality of it. But it's funny!
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Review of Odd O'blography  
for entry "Invalid Entry" 
Review by Spring in my Sox
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  
Rated: 18+ | (5.0)
I thought you meant like computer logging data. This was a pleasantly informative surprise. I like the view on a time and place you do a really good job of revealing. You as a character are also surprisingly interesting and I am rooting for you as you dodge the big trucks hauling timber.
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for entry "Overcome Selfishness" 
Review by Spring in my Sox
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  
Rated: 18+ | (5.0)
This caused me to reflect on my behavior today and question whether I was more upset about how I was treated or over the fact that I didn't get what I wanted. My inner child is screaming it isn't fair, I want I want. I worry about respecting that inner child but how do I condone her behavior?
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Review by Spring in my Sox
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  
Rated: E | (4.5)
I like the characters but the scene suffers from a lot of head hopping. I think it would be improved if you chose a character point of view and stuck to it. Going from the private thoughts of one character to another left me confused as to who was thinking what. If you really need to change pov end the scene and start a new one with the new point of view. The plot seems interesting. I think you could add more descriptive action. Instead of saying she looks unsure try to describe physical actions that shoe that she is unsure. That is how you can indicate what is going on in the non poverty character's head without changing pov.
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Review of The Bob  
Review by Spring in my Sox
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
Wow. I wonder how just Bob becomes the Bob they were looking for by my calculations they were just 7 years off in hitting the time frame they were aiming for. He isn't the ancestor he is just an earlier version. That is of course unless it all was just an elaborate dream.
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for entry "~ Ironic, Isn't It? ~" 
Review by Spring in my Sox
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  
Rated: 18+ | (5.0)
Man, that sounds a little silly. You had things financially covered and were working towards a degree that would up your earning potential. It seemed to lack foresight to quit school just to spend a little time on the beach. You should have thought about how your beach time increased your skin cancer chances and not about a one in a hundred thousand chance of a mac truck.
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for entry "A Mother's Lament" 
Review by Spring in my Sox
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
This is such a sad poem. There are a couple of places the wording doesn't quite flow.

The first line "This cradle that I once put you to sleep" doesn't seem like a complete thought I would word it "The cradle were I once put you to sleep."

I think that "It must've been me and not you, my little baby." should be "It should've been me and not you, my little baby." It seems to flow better.

I would reword "At how beautiful the world's expanse." to "At the world's beautiful expanse."

With this "You laugh at each tickle, every time you spill his cup." did you mean "your cup"?

One final note in a poem like this I would put the author's note in a dropnote so as not to clutter up the poem.







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for entry "A Mosquito's Plea" 
Review by Spring in my Sox
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
Some of the rhymes are a stretch but not beyond my tolerance. In my neck of the woods, this poem could as easily be spoken by a biting fly. They are even more annoying than the mosquitos. Mosquito bites only itch a minute or two after they take their part. Biting flies literally bite. It feels like a bite or a sting, it hurts and they are flying off before your hand gets the message to swat them. They splatter nice and bloody on lampshades too. I think the only part of the poem that doesn't equally apply to the biting fly is the part about the virus, which is inaccurate if you are talking about malaria the top mosquito-born illness in the world it is caused by a parasite not a virus.

Poetry Review Sig 1
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Review by Spring in my Sox
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
I like this poem, it is a perfect description of the whole Covid mess. The positive and the negative. Yes many people died. Yes there are conspiracy theories about its origins. But the fact is that it did a lot to bring families back together. People simply couldn't do all of the things that were tearing the families apart. In that way covid was a mixed blessing dressed as a curse. Even the loss of life wasn't the worst thing for the world in general, it gives the planet an extra second to breathe before we smother it with our population growth.

Poetry Review Sig 1
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224
Review by Spring in my Sox
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
I think this "As the ball of light shove itself slowly down" needs to have either balls, or shoves.
"Nothing much than that of the rodents." needs another word to make sense.

Those are the two main places where the wording tripped me up while I was reading. there were a couple more awkward places but I could get past them.

I loved the message of the poem. It showed your deep faith. It is an excellent contemplation of the worth of our salvation and the way most people don't live up to the promise made by Christ on the cross.

Poetry Review Sig 1
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225
Review by Spring in my Sox
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
I remember days like these. They don't happen anymore. Parents have the habit of scheduling every minute of their kid's time. There's soccer practice, dance lessons, trumpet lessons, after school programs, daycare, homework help programs. Parents are afraid to let their kids out of their sight, barely tolerating leaving them with "trusted" adults. Then the few minutes the kids have to themselves are spent playing video games on systems that cost as much as a car used to. It's ridiculous. I think kids had more fun back before parents started spending more money than sense on keeping their days structured.

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