%%USERNAME%%    %%ACCWORDS%% %%ONOFF%% |
| A eclectic Blog for people who like ketchup on their truffles. |
| Talk about corruption run amuck! What's all this debate about health insurance? I'll make it simple. I don't need health insurance. What I need is health care when I need it. The only people who need health insurance are the people making big money from providing health insurance. I don't want to take the profit motive out of health care. Health care providers gotta eat too. But I am for taking the profit motive out of providing access to health care. I don't see why I can't get my sore throat treated without adding to the private wealth of some billionaire CEO. I support the single payer option precisely because the money goes to the people who actually treat my sore throat. That's what the great healthcare debate is all about. The health INSURANCE providers have bought your senator and your congressperson. There is no longer a good reason for the existance of health insurance, but your senator and your congressperson, especially your conservative senator and your conservative congressperson, are guaranteed to come up with all kinds of bad reasons, couched in lofty rhetoric, as to why it's good that insurance providers can skim off the top. If bad reasons don't work, perhaps scare tactics will. i.e., too much government intrusion into our private lives (Why isn't there too much government intrusion into the private lives of women wanting an abortion?), or it's communism or it's socialism. Actually it's rationalism. Our present system is irrational because it's unsustainable. There's an argument that a patient won't be able to choose their doctor. There may be something to that argument, I don't know. I can't say that I have or want a meaningful relationship with my doctor. Once in a blue moon or so, I go into his office, and we engage in some uncomfortable foreplay until he finally gets around to anal penetration. Why do I need health insurance for that? Frankly, I should send him a bill. |
| Remember that guy Nathan Johnson, or whatever his name was, from the movie, “The Jerk”. Now I know how Nathan felt when he opened the phone book and saw his name there. I just went to myself on the internet. For a year or so, I’ve have my own URL,eulissmorgan.com, at Homestead.com. I was planning on doing fund raising for Obama if things got tight. But things never really got tight for Obama, so I didn’t use my site. But this morning I remembered it because I want to start my own ezine, and I was wondering if this little old website would do the job. So I popped eulissmorgan into my address bar and I popped right up. How cool is that! However, just as quickly as my bubble was inflated, it was cruelly popped. I tried googling myself. How in the hell can there be that many eulissmorgans in the world. There are only 6 billion or so people on earth. Do they all want to be me? Having a weird 1st name was kind of supposed to be my secret weapon when I published that 1st novel, but my name isn’t that unusual at all. After twenty pages, I gave up searching for me and googled my WDC login, eulisaz, instead. Again, I came right up. Good ol WDC. You’re nobody until you’re somebody on Google. I am somebody! |
| Surely there must be a dating service for conservatives. I not talking about some namby-pamby God-is-all-fire-and-brimstone dating service for “normal” Christian conservatives. What’s needed is something that would allow all the gun-toting, murderous conservatives of every race, creed, and color to mingle and kill each other rather than terrorizing the rest of society. Looking at the guy who shot the soldiers at the recruiting center, he’s an Islamic conservative. The guy who shot Dr. Tiller is, I believe, but I’m not sure about this, a Christian conservative. There exist all kinds of services for people seeking love. What's out there for people seeking hate? I know hateful people get together, but that's usually with like-minded haters. Nobody kills people who agree with them. These guys need a service which will allow them an opportunity for finding that "special" hate-filled relationship. The Tiller killer’s ad might look something like this: SWM: Christian, Nazi: looking for BM, preferably Islamic, for fireworks and mayhem, day or night. I love moonlight stalks along the beach and not shooting blanks. If I sound like somebody you’d like to kill, then I’d love to hit you from behind. P.S. I am safe, since I have no balls. The history of warfare is basically the history of conservatives fighting each other, usually for no good reason. I can’t think of a single conflict in the 20th Century not started by conservatives either trying to suppress liberal thought or take control of precious natural resources or just behaving badly. Incidentally Communists are conservatives too. Just look at the badly tailored suits they wear. But give them a military uniform and they’re turned out as nattily as can be. Lets make it easy for these fools to kill each other. Set aside a piece of the Sahara the size of Texas, along with a free one way ticket to the killing fields for people when they feel like blowing up innocent people or shooting somebody in the back. If Jihadists and Crusaders want to renew their feud, let them. Nazis against Commies, go right ahead. Jen vs. Angie, why not? Of course, I think we should give crazy people all the therapy they need, but most of these back-shooting, bomb-throwing bastards strike me as being more evil than crazy. The problem is that if we did give these son’s-a-bitches a free ticket to the killing fields, they wouldn't accept it, even with a free AK thrown in. These people are cowards at heart. It takes no courage to park a car bomb outside a Jewish community center, but it does take courage to face your enemy, especially when your enemy is all in your head. |
| “Joe picks up 50 rocks on Monday. On Tuesday he picks up 100 rocks. (giggle, giggle) Then on Thursday Joe picks up… Oh! Wait. How many rocks did I say he picked up on Wednesday? Oh yeah. (giggle, giggle) So on Saturday Joe picked up 300 rocks. How many rocks did Joe pick up on Sunday? (giggle, giggle) See we’re doing word problems in school. This is a word problem. Giggle, giggle, giggle…” Speaking of word problems, I need a word for describing 10 year old girls. EXISTENTIAL comes to mind. Girls simply are what they are. They exist and that’s about all you can say, but I not sure they exist in the same universe that I exist in. Also I thought in literature, Existentialism had to do with a dreamlike point of view. I don’t know if that’s correct or not, but that brought me to REM, from Rapid Eye Movements during a dream state. But these are more like rapid mouth movements followed by giggles ad infinitum. I have no word. “Watch me hit this ball!... Oh! I can’t hit it. You have to throw it to me… Ple-ease… {An hour later…} Why do you get tired so quick?… Oh, you’re not old. You have to be like ninety to be old. Are you ninety?... Didn’t think so. So throw the ball!” Okay. Now I’m thinking relax. Just think of 10 year old girls as funny-looking 10 year old boys. Better the devil you know… Just throw the ball until your arm falls off. But now she’s tired and she goes into self entertainment mode characterized by frequent use of the “be/like” construction. I don’t know what this construction is from a grammatical point of view, but it generally follows a shrill, high-pitched noise. She fouls the next pitch and it arcs right above her head. She ducks and screams “AHHH!” followed by gales of laughter. “Did you see that! I was like, “AHHH!” (More gales of laughter) Did you see me? (Rather hard for me to miss since I threw the ball and I’m still standing right in front of her) I was like, “AHHh!” (Still laughing hard) One time, when Mom was driving us to soccer, there was a snake crossing the road and all the girls were like, “AHhh!” (giggle, giggle) Like, “Ahhh.” That was funny. (Soft chuckle) (I’m thinking this particular fit has played itself out, but then--) “But what if Mom had hit it, then we would have really been, Like “AHHHHHH!!!!” Now do you see why I can’t come up with a word? Oh, the answer is 350 rocks because it's like: a pattern. Like Ahhhh!!!! |
| This ranting and raving about and against conservatives must be therapeutic because I’m not so angry anymore. I can even feel the humor creeping back into my writing. Still got a long way to go though, before I get all the skunk juice out of my system, and I’ve got a ten year old granddaughter in the house for the week. She keeps distracting me when I’m trying to write, and by the time I get back to my keyboard, I’ve forgotten what pusillanimous aspect of conservative comportment had me so pissed off in the first place. This could take a while |
| Clint Eastwood would make a good liberal God. Pee Wee Herman would make a good conservative God. Conservatives “put” their God and he stays put. You better not try that with our liberal God though. You’ll probably get some lightning bolts “put” up your ass in a most egregious manner. For years, conservatives have wanted to put God back into the schools. Good luck with that. But if the conservative do succeed in putting God back into the schools, the least we liberals can do is put God into the back seat of a mini van in the mornings, drive him to school, and pick him up in the afternoon. Put God! The very idea is contrary to the whole notion of an omnipotent and omnipresent God. If God is not in the schools, it’s because God doesn’t want to be there. Come to think of it, I thought Jesus advocated separation of church and state. Trying to stick God into somewhere he doesn’t want to be is worse than wrestling with an angry tomcat. Instead of going straight to putting God back into the schools, I suggest the Conservatives start with something easy, like putting God into the voting booth. Once the curtain is drawn on a voting booth, there’s only one voter and God, or in the case of conservative voters, only one voter. As part of their campaign to put God back into the schools, the religious right also wants to teach creationism in school. Why? Most of us accept The Book of Genesis, in the beginning, at its word. But people lose faith, and that is what all this “God” crap is really about. By definition something that must be taken on faith cannot be proven, but once something is taken on faith, it becomes an absolute. For a true Christian, there is no “Theory of Creationism” to teach. There is only the spreading of the Christian faith, and that task belongs to the Christian church not the public schools. Since it cannot be investigated by scientific method, Creationism does NOT belong in ANY school except Sunday School. By attempting to install religious instruction in government institutions, the religious right has launched one of the most insidious attacks possible against The Word mentioned in the beginning of Genesis. They are actually building the false church mentioned in The Book of Revelation. My understanding of Christianity is that salvation is attained through faith, but if the existence of God or the divine inspiration of The Bible can be proven by the scientific method, there is no point to faith. And maybe that’s why God wants to be in our hearts rather that in our schools. Even the suggestion that Creationism holds up AS A THEORY diminishes and defiles the very faith these right-wing “Christians” profess to hold in their hearts. That is why I don’t believe those people truly have faith in God. I don’t believe they love God and I don’t believe they follow Jesus, who told us to come to him like little children. These conservative, right-wing, fundamentalist know-it-alls run around “teaching” the unknowable. Christianity is based on a mystery. That’s the way it’s supposed to be. In another system of things, the truth will be revealed. The faithful don’t need to know the unknowable. They only need celebrate their faith, and that is what church is for. Actually, celebrating your faith is what life is for, but you need God in your heart to go that far. |
| That there are men of Viagra makes sense to me, but who in the hell are the WOMEN of Viagra? When I see the commercials for products like Viagra and Cialis, when their husbands walk in the door with a bottle—box of tablets? Vial? White powder in an envelope? or whatever type of container this stuff comes in—of on-demand boner, the women of viagra are overjoyed. My sweetie would probably slap the shit out of me if I came home with such a thing. She doesn’t understand that at my age time is of the essence. My heart can only support so many competing demands for my body’s blood supply, and for some reason, over which I apparently have no control, as I get older, a stiff Johnson slips ever farther down the list of priorities. If I’m watching TV when the “right moment” comes along, just the act of standing up puts stress on the system. By the time I make it from the couch in the family room to her favorite reading chair, my amorous intent is no longer in evidence. I stand before her with my cutest little-puppy-dog look and she says, “Go away. I’m trying to finish this chapter.” The women of Viagra must read a lot, because the commercials entice you with the staying power implied by that talking small print: “If you have an erection lasting longer than three hours, see your doctor.” Doctor Hell! If I have an erection lasting longer than three hours, I going down to the senior citizens’ center and show that bad boy off. The women of Viagra must also be married to liberal atheists, because conservative Christians could just pray for it: “Heavenly Father, give us this day our daily bread and an erection lasting no longer than three hours…. Amen” That’s all I’ve been able to figure out so far, but I’ve decided that I want to write the definitive work on the women of Viagra. Perhaps the WDC women of Viagra could provide me with further enlightenment. |
| North Korean dictator Kim Jong Il is a conservative fighting for his right to keep and bear nuclear arms. The policy of the United States is that he shouldn’t have the right to keep and bear nuclear arms. The president of Iran, Mahmoud Ahmadinejad, is a conservative politician who supports the right of his country to keep and bear nuclear arms. US policy is that the Iranian people do not have the right to keep and bear the same kinds of arms that we have. The case against allowing either of these two countries to obtain a nuclear weapon parallels, on a worldwide scale, the Second Amendment argument here in The United States. The Second Amendment is quite clear, and if North Korea and Iran could invoke it, the NRA would be helping them build nuclear reactors and missile sites. Yet here in the US, conservative politicians oppose, even to the extent of going to war, allowing either country to attain nuclear capability. Sportsmen, hunters, collectors, and even people stupid enough to think that owning a gun will make them safer, all have a legitimate, if sometimes hard to understand, reason for owning a gun. But only a pervert owns a gun just to own one, and for many of us liberals, there is something perverse and troubling about the proliferation of guns in America. We blame the availability of guns for the shootings at Columbine and Virginia Tech and most of the murder and mayhem extant across America every day. We need to let that go. The Second Amendment says what it says, and we must accept what it says unless we change The Constitution. Instead of decrying guns, we must work on reducing the number of conservatives who want to buy a gun. We liberals need to understand that while we have a dream, conservatives have a nightmare. Just as we work to make our dream of America, the shining beacon on a hill, come true; conservatives work to make their nightmare vision of America, the oppressive wasteland, come true. In a time of serious terrorist threat, they vote for “good ol boy” politicians rather than competent administrators, and when the US gets bombed by terrorists, they see barbarians at the gates and run out and buy guns. They vote against reasonable regulation and taxation, and then point to our crumbling economy and infrastructure as proof of the breakdown of authority and run out and buy more guns. They vote for conservative politicians, who rise to power on divisive issues. Then they run out and buy even more guns because they’re afraid of other Americans. We liberals need to stop obsessing about The Second Amendment and start winning more elections. Only when we have a firm grip on power, can we reverse the stupid laws and policies that make our citizens insecure in their own homes. Not only do we need to make America safe, we need to make America feel safe. In the hands of a competent person, guns are just another tool. Unfortunately, nothing can be made foolproof, and too many guns are in the hands of fools. Even so, we handle this issue like we handle all issues, we err on the side of freedom. Watching us enjoy the blessings of Liberty will eventually unseat oppressive regimes like North Korea and Iran. The conservatives won’t like it. They want their nightmare. But they’re long overdue for a wake up call. |
| Is it just me, or is everybody sick of Orville Redenbacher not having Old Fashioned Butter flavored popcorn in a ten-pack rather than a 3-pack. This is the worst case of unchecked corporate exploitation I have ever had the misfortune of being on the wrong end of. There must be half a dozen grades of Orville Redenbacher buttered popcorn, and I bet Old Fashioned Butter is the most popular. That why they extort the most per ounce that they can. And what is Old Fashioned Butter anyway? I figure if it's old fashioned, it can't be full of steriods and growth hormones and such. They don't call it "old fashioned butter" in the list of ingredients. They call it "Less than 2% of: Butter". They probably can't use any more than that because old fashioned butter is so hard to come by. |
| Okay. I know my posts are long, but I'm venting. Once I get this invective out of my system, maybe I can start writing in a more humorous vein, and the posts will get a lot shorter. |
View Portfolio
Visit Notebook
Send Gift Points
Awards
Badges
Send Email
Community Newsfeed
General Discussion
Sponsored Items
Book of Trinkets
Static Items
Books
Groups
Interactive Stories
Audio
Campfire Creatives
Community Notes
Crossword Puzzles
Documents
Folders
Images
In & Outs
Madlibs
Photo Albums
Polls
Product Reviews
Quizzes
Survey Forms
Web Pages
Word Searches
