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 |  Blog for this groups entries~will probably be rather interesting!~ |
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I am going to try out the Welcome To My Reality contest and this is my blog for all of my entries. Each entry will be based off of a different prompt! I am looking forward to doing this! This may be interesting!! |
| 12) If you could have any job, what would it be? Besides a writer.....hmmmmm....For sure something that would allow me to be able to talk to people who have mental or health issues, been abused, parents of a special needs child, people who have psychic abilities....to be able to talk to people who I can relate to and help...if even by just letting them know they are not alone...I want to help people who have and do deal with these things...Being a parent of a special needs child is a experience that NOBODY can understand unless they have been through it...I wish that when I was sitting by my daughters bed every day all day for 10 months, that there had been someone who came and talked with me...on a down to earth real s*** kind of level.....because maybe then I would not have felt so alone...maybe I would have felt that someone actually GOT what I was feeling and dealing with...because truly, it is a entirely different world when you are going through these types of things...and it is so frustrating to not have anyone to talk to that TRULY gets it. There is not enough awareness for these types of things....Society is very judgemental about these things....and that is not how it should be for people who struggle with these issues. They NEED someone who can look at them and say "I understand"...and them be able to feel like maybe there is hope.....they realize they are not alone in their battle. I really think that I can help people....and to me...that is the best job you can have....  |
| 11) What was/is your worst job? Ahhhh.....I would have to say it was when I was about 15 and I worked at Subway....I did not mind the making of the subs or even the daily duties...what I hated was that I was 15...had my first serious boyfriend who was 18....and was leading a pretty cool life at the moment....BUT I could NOT handle the fact that I daily had the lingering smell of lunch meat stuck to me...no matter how much I washed my body and hair...washed my uniforms daily....I always smelled like a big freaking cold cut....um yea...having my first serious boyfriend meant I was making out and all that fun crap...I am pretty sure that the scent of a fresh piece of turkey or ham, was NOT a turn on...I tried every damn body soap and shampoo I could to try to find something that would help....nope...I was a big ol' walking foot long smelling thing...then I saw how some of the foods that I loved there came packaged and it just kind of made me wanna NOT work there anymore...I finally had to quit...and what sucks is that my boyfriend and my best friend and other people kept insisting that the smell was really not as strong as I thought it was...and now looking back I am sure they were right...but I was battling mental illness about that time of my life and was untreated and uneducated...so I basically made myself paranoid and to feel like the smell was stronger then it really was....I even remember trying back then to get my mom to take me to the doctor because I KNEW there was trouble brewing deep within the dwelling of my mind....but I was told that mental illness is not real, it was all in my head and to just snap out of it and move on. So I was left untreated....which as you can see...lead me to quit a decent job for really no reason. Ugh...I wish that I had been listened to, heard...and that I could have gotten help then...maybe if so I would not be as bad as I am now.... So even though the job was not a horrible one...it was for sure my least favorite one....and gee gosh golly...I am sure you can understand why LoL!!~ |
| 10) What was/is your best job? Sadly my physical and mental health have made it to where I am not able or allowed to work any longer. Before though, when I did work, I have always loved working sales/retail. My grandfather used to tell me I could sell a ketchup popsicle to a woman wearing white gloves...it took me a while to realize that he was saying I can sell anything to anybody. I have a knack for selling and it is something that I am good at doing. I have worked in 3 major Jewelry store chains in my life, selling diamonds that cost as much as my truck did.....I worked at Victoria Secret Catalog call center...only 2 in the entire world...one in Japan and one in Ohio....I took over a 100 calls a day sometimes and even over the phone I was able to almost always end up getting the customer to buy more then they planned to....I ran my own business and sold adult sex toys, lotions, creams and more...I was booked 6 months in advance for these parties and I made amazing money doing it. I just have the gift that a salesperson needs to have in order to make the most money they can. I loved working in sales...it was a good income, especially when I got a hourly pay PLUS commission....the bigger you see you can make by being a good salesperson, the harder you try at it. Before my health issues became what they are, I could and would be able to talk to anyone...gift of gab for sure...still do but now only with my friends and family....my anxiety has taken a lot from me and being able to chat with anyone about pretty much anything is one of those things taken from me. I miss those awesome sales/retail jobs and I really miss the money I made by being good at what I did. I know I still got it though cause I can have a yard sale and I STILL got the gift of talking them right into buying more or something they never planned too. Go me...maybe someday I can use those good old salesperson skills again. |
| 9) Do you believe in fate or making your own destiny or a combination of both? I believe in a lot of things....I believe in fate as well as making your own destiny. I believe that if you want something bad enough and work hard at it then you can guide your destiny....I believe that everything happens for a reason and that sometimes we may never understand or even like the reason...or hell even may never KNOW the reason....but things do happen for a reason. I think that fate happens to and for us when we need it...I have met a couple of amazing people that I believe in my heart, was brought into my life by fate. They say that life is what you make it....and I agree with that to a point....I think life is what you make it...with some help from other and higher powers. I believe that every person that is in your life now...has been in every past life you have ever had...just not always as the same. Perhaps my oldest daughter was, in another life, my mother or my best friend....perhaps my son was my uncle or maybe my cousin....maybe my best friend was once my twin sister....Anything is possible and I believe that the people in our lives have been written into the script of our many lives each and every time, just a different script each life. I trust in fate because it has happened to me..I have seen it, experienced it and can say personally, fate is very powerful. Combining fate and the desire to make your own destiny...with an open mind and listening and watching for the signs....can be a strong force and if used correctly, life changing. I think that anything is possible when you are talking about fate, destiny, hope, dreams and more. I am a very open minded person and I allow my mind to stay open to these things...I see the signs that are given to me...I feel the presence and guiding help from the other side...and all this is possible...because I believe in them. |
| 8) Are you more interested in local, regional, nation or international news? Why? Honestly, I have talked about this once before, but I hate to watch the news...if I do it is local news though...so at least I can be saddened, angered and paranoid about local crap I suppose LoL I do not like seeing all of the hate, anger, violence, bullying, bashing, overdoses and all the other s*** that people do....knowing it is happening right in my town saddens me. I have said and STILL say that the world would be a whole lot nicer of a place if every person did JUST one nice thing for someone a day...smile at a stranger....they may feel all alone and your smile could change their day...open a door for someone....say a kind word to someone, it may be just what they needed to hear that day....take over some cookies next time to bake to a neighbor that you don't know very well just to be kind....buy a co-worker a coffee....send a card to a friend for no reason other then to let them know you were thinking about them....just do ONE nice thing to someone...anyone...a day....and I swear the world would be a nicer place.... Watching the news has it pros and cons for sure....being educated and knowledgeable about what is happening in your area is a smart thing....and as I have explained...it can be a sad thing as well....So am I interested in the news...yes and no...I like to be aware but seeing news story after news story of bad or sad things for sure can affect me mentally....I can become more paranoid...depressed...anxious...never know... With social media it is easier for me to scroll and pick and chose which things I want to know about and I can bypass the ones I don't. It may seem odd but it is just how I feel about watching the news!! |
| 7) Do you smile at strangers? Do they smile back? Do you smile back at people who smile at you first? Why or why not? Ahhh....interesting....Well, I guess my answer would be...it depends.....LoL If I am depressed or down feeling, I try to not even go out of the house but if I have to I will walk with my head down normally and not really make contact with anyone...and if I do and they smile I of course smile back but it is not MY smile...it is my "I'm down but gonna smile anyway" smile lol Now..if I am UP and in a good mood and feeling good I will smile and even make small talk with people...I am someone who when I am UP I can talk to anyone even though it may make me nervous or anxious...it is ok because my good feeling balances it our for me better. Like when I go to see my psych doctor or my therapist and I am UP...I always chat with this lady at the front desk there...we always joke around with each other when I am in a good mood....and when I am down she knows because I will check in and go to waiting room...if I am up I will chat and joke with her and we always laugh... I used to run my own business for almost 4 years about 15 years ago....I sold adult toys, lotions, creams and all that...basically I sold sex toys and products for the bedroom...I would book parties and go to these women's houses and stand in front of a room of women and do my demo and I was and am a hell of a salesperson.....I was great at talking to a room full of strangers...sometimes I would do college parties and there would be close to 100 women there.....and back then my mental issues were there but no where near like they are now...so I COULD handle working and being around a lot of people and selling something as private as I was. I was booked 6 months in advance and I was making great money.....I stopped after almost 4 years because of many reasons, but I loved it when I did it. My point is that when I am UP....I can and will smile, chat and be just a friendly person...I will actually make it a point to do something nice to at least one person a day, smile, open a door, whatever....I feel if everyone in the world would do ONE nice thing like that a day..the world would be a nicer place. |
| 6) Are you single or in a relationship? Would you like your status to change? Why? Ha Ha...Well I was in an 11 year marriage that I ended about 9 years ago...it was just the best choice....I then dated a few people here and there but never anything that I felt was what would complete my family. Then I met Steve....I am almost 38 and he is 56 and we have the best bond and relationship. He has taught me so much...horseback riding...fishing..camping...on and on....I have taught him that mental illness is real...that same sex relationships are perfectly acceptable....he slows me down and I speed him up LoL We have been engaged for 3 years now and are just waiting for things to settle down in life before we take the plunge....not that we are not ready because we are...but some major life issue comes up that we have to take care of first...plus while it will be a simple probably courthouse wedding...we are wanting to have a backyard reception...we have someone to roast a hog..a dj...lights...we are slowly getting things we will need. And we will get there and it will happen when the time is right!! Right now we are happy as is and that is what matters.....as long as we have each other, we have strength and a bond that is unbreakable! He was my missing link....my missing piece to make our family complete....and I am the luckiest person ever to be able to call him mine!! Life has a way of bringing you what you need when you least expect it or thought you needed it....Love is an amazing feeling and I am thankful to be able to share it with such an amazing man!! |
| 4) What is your typical day like? Do you follow routines or go about the day randomly doing what needs to be done? I am living the schedule of being a second shift working fiance.....sooooooo My daily routine depends on how late I stayed up nite before and how bad my insomnia was...sometimes I do not sleep at all.....sometimes I sleep brokenly...a hour here...a hour there...SO there are days I am already up and days I may not get up till 9:30 or so.... Then if I have any errands or appointments I do them...if I do not have any appointments or errands then Steve and I may work on our side project...or we may just chill at home.... If I happen to crash early...sometimes he will come home and stay up for a few hours...causing him to want to sleep late the next day...so there is not a lot of time that we do get together...weekends, unless they mandate him to work..... Since my kids are older they all do their own thing and he works seconds.....so I am alone a lot....I spend my days doing my errands, and appointments if there are any and then I spend the rest of my day doing my house work, laundry, cook dinner, work on here and work on things that I need to do for myself like paperwork, organizing, crafting, things like that. And not a day is spent without my furbaby dog Zoey by my side 24/7~ |
| 3) Is your life, right now, what you thought it would be at this point, either in a positive or negative way? Ahhh....well this is interesting..... Positively there are things in my life that have changed so much and are just amazing....new friends...new beginnings.....fresh outlooks....plans being made for summer....working on my crafts and flowers....bug sale coming up in a month so we gotta hurry!! I am learning a lot about myself, about how to deal with and handle things....how to avoid things that bring me down....I am learning and I am growing...Positive!! Negatively there are things in my life that have always been there...they just seem to worsen...get meaner...more vengeful...more controlling....these things will not go away....however because of the above things in the positive aspect, I am learning to handle and deal with them better then I have been. Step by step....weather positive or negative...I am growing...learning and breaking free....wanting to come out of the grasp of what controls me....wanting to heal...wanting to understand...wanting to know....I am getting there...step by step. In my opinion, that is progress nonetheless....all because of the fact that I AM trying. And that to me...counts...big time!! ANY step forward in my opinion is a progress....especially with some of the curve balls that life has thrown at me.... Growing daily....learning every minute....allowing myself to open up more to things....I am proud of myself for that. And that is NOT something that happens very often at all...actually rarely....lol...I need to learn to value myself more and realize that I SHOULD be more proud of myself more often!! |
| 2) Who do you spend the most time with? Is it a beneficial or harmful relationship? Is it more one sided than the other? Well with the kids so grown up and doing their own things....Steve works second shift. He leaves at 2:15 and gets home around 11:30pm...so I am alone a LOT...so I spend the most time with my furbaby dog Zoey who is the best dog in the world. I rescued her from the kill shelter 3 days before she was to be put down because of overcrowding....(grrrrr).... We have been side by side 24/7 for almost 2 years this coming July. The dog fishes with me and watched my bobber for me.....she roadtrips all the way to Kansas and back..twice...she kayaks with me every summer every time I go.....if I could take her to my doctor appts and grocery shopping I would be much happier lol She knows when I am upset or anxious and she calms me down.....she can make me feel better no matter what...she never cares what I wear, how my hair looks, or anything...she unconditionally loves me no matter what and she is truly my bestest furry friend ever. I would do anything for her and she is so appreciative and grateful of us and out affection and perhaps spoiling of her LoL We needed each other and we have become the best therapy for one another...she had a bad life before me and I before her as well...she is the one that will lick my tears away as she crawls into my lap when I am upset to show she loves me....and it may sound silly, but that means a LOT~~ |
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