Good poem..describes the human race :)
Makes me think of out of body experiences.
One gets a taste of heaven and hell.
The vastness is so great. A person only touches
upon what is. Like walling one of the lines in your
poem but many more lines branch from that one. It continues in a
place of no time BUT yet one can go back or ahead.
The heaven is all good. Did you know that evil loves heaven..yes..
it wanted it so badly. Evil tried to take over which can't be. That would
be like tying to take over dad..not happening. Not without hell breaking
loose. "I open my eyes in the morning light," whew! just a dream..hmmm.
A dangerous female :) Her sexuality will not be denied.
Her power to persuade is beyond anything known.
Can't be resisted and won't.
Marriage..Oh that sticky web. But it's worth it.
Sucking the blood is one of the many pleasures. :)
I like your poem very much. I had a black widow in my old
wooden shed while living in Florida.
Awesome poem. Something is troubling this person very much.
He remains strong..won't let it get him down. He is "lion-hearted"
This individual puts himself with Kings.:) Where the poem states,
"I will fight, I'll never rest." that's the lion. :) Plus the title has "I am"
in it..that sounds Biblical :) Godly.
I think where you write: "I'm imprisoned." and
"Could be I'm simply broken.
Could be I'm stuck in motion.
Could be I'm born to lose.
Could be...I'm born to choose?"
I find his Feelings of imprisonment , broken, stuck, and lost is maybe the reason
he states "cowardice"? I find it brave..dealing with life in a positive way.
This person knows he has choice. He's clearly has strength and ready to move on.. You state it here "I will live,"
I like this poem. It has smile with it. The writer reveals humor with
seriousness. I love where it says, "this downpour is enough to make an atheist pray" :)
AND where the individual was "Darted from the shadows like a hasty sunrise"
Again right here.."Imaginary enemies push my back against a real wall" I love that.
I could go on BUT I will end by remarking on this:
"Sole survivor, solo trip, not two, but one flew over this cuckoo's nest" really nice.
The poem is a song. Good job
Thanks for sharing. Very nicely done. You get a five from me
This individual has a lot to say..just bubbling with information..
stories to tell..probably most are true. I feel this person
is ready to explode with his/her talent. The only problem
is: uncertainty. That "Trespassing" sign keeps popping up.
It seems to be everywhere..blocking out the scenery, breaking the
mind into thinking: you do not belong. Well..I say..knock on
the door of talent and enter in..tap into the world of your
expertise. One won't know what that is until they venture. :)
You are not in "someone’s back yard" look a little closer.
It's a world for poets, leaders, spectators, and writers and
so much more..its your place :) its here
"And yet it’s all an effortless existence of beauty" I love that..very nice.
Nature is so simple..so elaborate..its crudeness so sophisticated.
It lives and dies and lives again..marvelous."It’s simply the true dance of nature."
I agree. Will you save a dance for me :)
Society..being civilized. We then dig into things that are
so barbaric..out of control. We thrive on the thrill of
the bad, the gross, the unrefined. It takes us into
something more from what we have. The party of
difference..unsophisticated and wicked. No Christian
would be here..yet I see reverend John. We'll worry about
being saved again later..after all..he's here..it can't be
that bad.
This is how we think. We find reasons to do things. We
rationalize and use others as role models to continue
the practice. SO.."weeping and sobbing no one will heed"
until HE returns..yes indeed.
"What will be said of me?" I'm sure with most of us there will be
someone saying something that we'd rather be forgotten.
I'm leaving a bunch of journals. Nobody has to second guess
with me..just look it up. :) well..I did leave out some things.
I think after we pass away,God has us hear what people say.
We get to know how we affected others. When we see it, we will
be thoroughly surprised. Things we never could have imagined will
be brought to light. We have to remember, how we touched others
will sweep across many individuals. We communicate something
that influences people..impressions made..our mark left. I guess
there's two eternal lives going on. Something goes and somethings stay
Wasn't there a movie where people were on a train and this train took
them to their destination..heaven or hell.. Are you that train? Anyways..
the individual in the story decides who goes to heaven or hell.(I think) Its here
where you say "I decide if you are worthy to pass through the gates of Heaven."
That gives me hope :) because IF you were all that evil, you wouldn't be sending
anyone through the gates of heaven. You must have some good. :)
AND I see more hope because I think the deliverer is really asking for help.
I tend to fall on the side of maybe he/she being a decent person who wants to
go through those pearly gates too. BUT the evil creeps in because of the negative thoughts.
The individual feels he/she isn't worthy, feels its some curse. Right here you say "This is my curse"
So..maybe this trip you're on is a journey to find who you really are..some sort of test maybe.
Next time you get near those gates, get into the light..feel the warmth :)
Interesting story. I hope I made sense on this review.
Getting to know someone. If it works..it will happen.
Where you say, "How can love make One feel so sick" I think this
person has a fear of loss or they finally found a special person
they think won't stay. Where its written, "do not disappear"
This individual seems to think the person they want won't ever
come back. Could it be a low self esteem or something
going on that one thinks will affect the outcome.
Willing to take it slow " just want you awhile"needing "more time" :)
"My mind dreams freely" a place of comfort. Comfort zone :) fantasizing
I guess its no secret..no rose by the door.
Leaving our love in the red..bleeding once more.
Let the garden grow as it may.
The thorns represent wisdom, I would say.
This blossom "No matter in whose garden it grows"
there will always be a Nightingale singing its prose.
So much is not seen because we have become to materialistic.
If its not tangible then it's not actual. It's like setting a limit on
one's being.
I agree there is far more here, there, everywhere. I like how children are
immeasurable in their thinking. They believe and so they see.
"Even though no one can see the future there is hope-"
we live today.
The person having this dream is wanting to get away from something.
This individual is crying for help. I feel they have an idea how to get
it but can't seem to get out from under the blankets. Pull the blankets
down..look at the light..its your hope/help waiting for you.. time to get up :)
Sisters can be helpful or discouraging, happy for you then jealous. Competitive definitely.
Its so nice the sisters stay in touch. It seems they found a common ground..love. Love
is the key that allows one to fly free with God's guidance. I just read a story about
a butterfly who had to learn through the struggles in life in order to escape the cocoon
of residence. The butterfly reveals its true colors now :)
Sounds like things got pretty heated :) they were that bad or that good.
It sounds like you've been burned.
If you stay long enough, you might see the black dragons. Someone in
that place is for you..your helper..your protector :) the number 3. Keep smiling.
Sense of humor..I like it.
Very nice :) I'm thinking God. We are given a path. When we trust in him,
he shows us the way. The Bible is the map. It provides us with directions
in the heart, soul and mind. When we love Jesus then we're suppose
to walk in Christ. This can be tough with so many distractions in life.
The negatives know us well. One little slip or slide on our path is all it
takes for cronies to set in. I love where you say,
"As a beacon of light, the whole world can watch you." Role models..yes.
One would think after seeing someone trip up that they'd be more careful.
Not so..we all learn in our own way. History repeats itself.
We are all human with spirituality residing within. You are right.
"Do for others as you want them to do for you." understanding, caring, giving a
helping hand when the road becomes a bumpy one. A simple smile does
wonders too :)
I like your poem very much. You need to write some more. I think I read most
of your work. I need to talk though, I haven't written anything in a long while.
Pro-life..you do have a way with words. After reading this piece,
I see depth. It's soundless but deafening. While reading
the story, I felt so heavenly then suddenly submerged into
unfathomable immeasurable loss. I feel like saying, I miss
you. Maybe it's coming from those who were "torn inside violently
damaged in tiny pieces" These souls will know..they will recognize
their mother when they meet again. Maybe in some unknown way
they give guidance. I know they completely forgive.They liberate mother who was
once touched by an angel.
I like this. I agree with "Love in the heart makes the clearest mind."
But then I remember what a broken heart can do..things turn foggy
real fast. :) BUT I know what you are saying. Love is the key. Let
a kind, caring heart guide us. It does make for a soft smile and happiness.
Giving is better than receiving...I know this..there's no other feeling like it.
It stands alone. I love it :) Giving helps others to know someone cares.
Their day becomes a better one then they too can spread the good. :)
Wow..this is interesting and very sad. You kept me reading with
a sense of wanting to do something but feeling helpless. couldn't
imagine having to go through such an ordeal in a real life situation.
Dreams can be brutal. They tell us something about ourselves.
I'm happy it was only a dream.
This individual was hoping you could extract
from yourself something they gave and regret.
When one's vision is failing, another sense
becomes stronger. This is a common thing
in nature. The "tiny shards of glass" sparkle
in the light of love. Hope lives forever.
I like your poem very much. We all have our
light of perception. :)
I like spooning :)
A knife gets down to business. Its sharp, quick, right
to the point :) When it gets together with The fork..we see they are friends.
One will hold something down while the other inflicts terrible pain.
They are the ones not to be trusted. They feed from one another :)
Cute story. I like how you used the spoon to stir it all together. Nice
Have you ever used the spoons to make music :) You make me think of those
who use wash broads and old wash tubs for instruments I thinking moonshine also :)
"A mountain exist
Within my soul
Forever climbing
Upward bound "
That's beautiful. Then you talk of pushing, crushing and saying ****you to the world.
Who are you really angry at..your mother, God..maybe both. You say you are "An unwanted gift"
The positive side of that is "gift" everyone likes a gift. If you weren't hear something would be
missing. That being you :) You are special.
Good poem. Its good to rant at times :)
It seems you are looking at people as vultures. "Such a terrible way of living" I do agree
there are some buzzards out there but one has to remember there are robins, cardinals,
hawks, eagles and many more. Everyone having its place with nature and God :)
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