i love this !!
i have nothing bad to say at all, i love the message this peom tells and i love the rhyme, i actually laughed out loud at the end at how good it was.
very well structured and precice, it's like a tiny little story, so cute (dont know if i'm allowed to call a peom cute ...).
i was affraid of the dark when i was young but if some one had read this to me i would never have feared darkness again :)
well done, keep writing !
(:
I love this, it's so simple and it just made me smile.
I fint it amazing how the sound of something can bring back so many mamroies, the sound of a ciocada brings back a flood of momories for me from when we were in Italy, I love that sound.
Great writing :)
a great piece of writing ! it took me two times to read it and get the story straight but after that it clicked. it has an undertone of dark humour and that adds to the effect at the end when you can fill in the rest of the story with your imagination.
with a limit of 300 words you have done well to explain the background as well as what you can see as the next part of the story, well done ! :)
the overall plot line is good and the begining throws you in to the story but i think you could use a bit more description of the near crash and why 'rachel' still wanted to go on the date ....
other wise a good piece of writing, well done ! :)
made me chuckle this did !
we're doing Jack the Ripper in history.
this is a good twist to a great part of history you really made it come alive and including the accent and the bit about Queen Victoria made the writing very easy to imagine, that is what i like best in a peice of writing; the image it creates !
well done :)
this is perfect !
it has feeling and raw emotion and you have captured the obnoxious behaivour of a 7th grade class perfectly.
if i had 6 months to live i would get my head down and write as much as i possibly could and pour all of my creativity out on to paper so that if some one read it, they would remember it.
brilliant ! :)
this is good :)
the ending especially, you know what happens in an endless circle yet the writer only accounts part of the cycle, brilliant!
i like how you start the story in the middle of the action, it leaves how 'Jake' got to the booth to your imagination.
this made me laugh!
it took me a while to figure out what the character was (but that just comes with my slow mind) after that it all made sense. i enjoyed this, well done!
this is very good, it reminds me of the katy perry song: thinking of you.
i enjoy anything that rhymes and the simplicity of this poem leaves you with a funny feeling in your stomach, because right now i'm wondering if this is from a past experience ...
well done !
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