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Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/books/item_id/2020667-me/day/10-30-2019
Rated: XGC · Book · Other · #2020667
blog of a person who seems to be invisible...
ok.. so I'm taking a next step in my life. I'm improving on myself. I'm going down this path i am on, thanks to God. I now attend a church regularly, and I like its small confines in a church building i attended nearly 40 years ago. To me it is surreal.

Do i know whats ahead, or even where I am going? no, not at all. to be honest it scares me, but I need to step out of my fear and take charge of my life, and live it the way I and God want me to be. where ever this path goes, I'm sticking it out to the end. I feel it is a testament to who I am.
I am learning more and more everyday about myself. and improving, also trying to make amends for past mistakes.
But one can only make amends for mistakes where there was mistakes to begin with, if people don't want to listen then that is their fault, and their loss. I wont go where im not wanted and I know I am a good man, if you don't.. well that's too bad so sad for you...
October 30, 2019 at 12:52pm
October 30, 2019 at 12:52pm
#968650
DAY 2536 October 30, 2019
Discuss this quote in your blog: “Why do we resist the mystery that change brings? When we get too rigid and inflexible, rigor mortis of the soul sets in. For proof of this, we need look no further than to those who choose to stay in a relationship or job long after the soul, or life force, that originally brought it passion and joy has vacated the premises.” ― Dennis Merritt Jones

In my humble opinion, and again it is my own opinion that humans, as a whole like for things to stay the way they always have been. There is the bit of safety in the things that dont change. For example, I am a good example, I stayed in a relationship for 14 years until I realized it was a dead relationship, and even tho I tried various things to perk things up, nothing changed. Why did I stay? why not just either talk about it or just leave? Safety. I felt comfort in staying in one place where I knew it to be safe.

My mistake is not doing that which I should have done and talked about it. It might have saved something. the only thing my silence brought was pain to her and to me. I wasted time chasing someone who truly wasn't worth it, or really even good enough for me, and I ruined everything.

If you were to ask my opinion, the answer to this question is simply safety.

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Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/books/item_id/2020667-me/day/10-30-2019