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 |  Blog and other works of literary sense |
| Here is a collection of ruminations and whatnot. |
| Dearest Colin, I hope you are having a good day. I started mine about an hour ago. I had coffee and then made pancakes. The dogs loved it. The puppy was so agitated and barked quite a bit when he realized I was going to and was making pancakes. He's somehow a unique puppy because he barks and I think in the beginning I thought he was upset but I think he merely wishes to communicate the way he can. So I do talk to him and reply in what I think he's asking me to say. He's really a nice puppy and I wish to thank You for him. Max is doing as well but he hardly really barks but he does look at me with a sad face and sometimes I think it's to tell me that the puppy is tormenting him. The puppy likes to bite him, and me, but it's his difficult thought I think. I'm done with that darker blue yarn so I'm not able to decide what to do with the dishcloth project. I'm still going on with the baby blanket and well, I'm not sure what more to do - there is the blue one and it's a pattern but I'm somewhat lazy about following it now. It does seem to have a pattern for sure but I'm not that into it now. I"m feeling some laziness and wish to do nothing a lot. Or I'll go on Twitter and see what's what. But I cannot be too sure about Twitter because there are bad people there who do nothing but make others feel bad for tweeting innocuous things, like me. I realize there's someone out there who's looking at my social media and wants to be with me always and so for his sake I tweet and do the other social stuff. I do not devote too much on the other social media but if I do have a short thing to talk about I copy and paste it on these. SOmetimes I get blocked and that's something I don't care to push. Whenever there's a chance I get to write on there. Tumblr's one of those and sometimes reddit. Nothing to really be concerned about. I received some debit cards in the mail. I've activated two, but the second one has become a focus of attention from hackers so I'm not furthering it to where I can go to see what the account looks like. I think there's no money in it and so that's going to probably remain in frozen mode as it's not clear whether I need to even use it. My soc sec check won't be here for a few weeks yet. Not sure that I'm going to be able to pay everything. Not really caring about that. Nor about much in the financial way as I'm tired of worrying over these things. The bad thoughts hate that and will try to push me to some desparate move, I think. If that happens it could be that I'll get taken to jail for some non-payment of things. Or I'll be given a frightful thought. It's like that a lot of the times. I don't know when this will end. I'm very upset at the length of time it's taken for me to get out of this sad life but it is a life and I won't complain about it. It's sad mainly because nothing's happening between us. And you don't care to do much about it due to your own obligations to your life and what attachments you have in it. I haven't much in the way of attachments but I suppose I might be attached to having Dad around and if he gets killed in his sleep that would be very sad and I'll have to decide how best to get on without him and the things that have to do with seeing him buried off. I am sure that his thoughts are upset at the idea and so is he. I do NOT wish him to pass on. I don't like the idea that he'll be taken away by the same people who go along with that bitch of a mom I had in my life. My life after being Ione. Sorry that I have a rather morbid and sad letter to You. Just telling You what is going on in my thoughts, my life. I've to do an errand today - packages to HRH and the women at the convent in NY. The convent ladies had lost a member who I used to see occasionally when we went to their chapel in the years they served the community here. The convent ladies were ordered to go to their home cloister in Maine a while back and so we had nobody there at the house they stayed in (it had a chapel in it). The Maine convent closed up recently and all the remaining women there went to NY and that's about all I know. I've been taken out of the driving thing - two traffic tickets that I got. I cannot drive off on my own on a whim or on an errand. Dad has to drive me if I need to go get yarn or mail something or shop at the pet store et cetera. I'm ok on pet food for the dogs and cats. The yarn thing I can keep on but I am not quite lacking in some colours yet. I'm not too eager to go out anyway. If I do I don't linger anywhere. We've had a few decent meals in the evening. I've sold a few items to get some cash. Those items were the class rings. And a Jerusalem cross, and a silver band ring, and the gold band ring that I was to have in hand for that bastard who said in the 2017s that he wanted to marry me and I was to arrange for the ceremony and location and the venue et cetera. I get a visit from his thought(s) frequently. I hear from time to time that he's died but somehow he returns to the thoughts. I cannot get too upset about it now as I'm so fucking weary of him and what he's been pulling lately. Once he got me and Dad haring off to Indianapolis to repair my computer and so we went there sometime after 3 pm and then we took the dogs along. I had to bring the puppy to th eApple store and it scandalized a few customers. I didn't care and I acted like silly ass and they told me to come back the next day as they were all booked up. I didn't know they had to make an appointment with customers. I saw a couple of our children there but they hardly said anything, actually they said little - merely smiled. Then well, today I will see if I can catch up on decluttering and when I've done that I might nap. I think I'll have to nap now. Love, Mary |
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