This is a fantastic piece. The title is enigmatic and attention grabbing. It tells the reader very little about what the piece is actually about. They are intrigued and will begin to read to find out more. You launch into the piece without introduction or preamble. This takes all the reader's attention and focuses it completely on the topic and the piece. They will read to the last word. You have written about how to expand Major League Soccer. You have done your research here. You are conversant with your topic and easily make it comprehensible for your reader. The length is perfect. You completely develop your topic without belaboring the issue and making the piece tedious. You use a a formal, organized style that is very appealing to the reader. Great job.
This is a fantastic story. The tone is formal. It suits the story and plot very well. The reader is wondering if Tom will improve his carpentry skills with Mr. Smith's help. They will read to the last word to find out. The story is about a carpenter who finds his work to be flawed and reaches out for help. The conflict is well defined. There is no doubt about what is going on here. The characters are well developed and believable. They come across as real people. The dialogue is well done and realistic. The characters speak like real people. The description is detailed and vivid. It puts the reader all the way into the story. The story is well structured and consistent in terms of point of view and tense. You have accomplished a great deal in just a few words. Great job.
This is a fantastic story. The tone is full of anxiety. It grabs all the reader's attention and makes them want to read on. The reader is wondering if Tim will go home now that his father has died. They will read to the last word to find out. The story is about a woman who visits her estranged brother to get him to return home after their father's death. The conflict is well defined. There is no doubt about what is going on here. The characters are well developed and believable. They come across as real people. The dialogue is well done and realistic. The characters speak like real people. The description is detailed and vivid. It puts the reader all the way into the story. The story is well structured and consistent in terms of point of view and tense. Great job.
This is a fantastic poem. The tone is filled with surprise, confusion and sorrow. It grabs all the reader's attention and makes them want to read on. The poem is about a man who waits for years for his wife to awaken from a coma. The reader is wondering if this couple will be together again. They will read to the last word to find out. I love poems which tell stories. The rhyme is well done and consistent. It gives the poem a wonderful rhythm. The meter is consistent from line to line. The poem flows extremely well. It is a pleasure to read. You have used punctuation and grammar consistently in this poem. There is nothing to distract the reader from their reading pleasure. Great job.
This is a fantastic story. The tone is formal. It suits the story and plot very well. The reader is wondering if the King will be satisfied with the tapestry he has ordered from Raj. They will read to the last word to find out. The story is about a weaver who is given the job of making a tapestry for his king. The conflict is well defined. There is no doubt about what is going on here. The characters are well developed and believable. They come across as real people. There is no dialogue but it is not needed here. The description is detailed and vivid. It puts the reader all the way into the story. The story is well structured and consistent in terms of point of view and tense. You have accomplished a great deal in just a few words. Great job.
This is a fantastic essay. The title is enigmatic and attention grabbing. It tells the reader very little about what the essay is actually about. They are intrigued and will begin to read to find out more. You launch into the essay without introduction or preamble. This takes all reader's attention and focuses it completely on the topic and the essay. They will read to the last word. You have written about the buying habits of today's consumers. You have done your research here. You are conversant with your topic and easily make it comprehensible for your reader. The length is perfect. You completely develop your topic without belaboring the issue and making the essay tedious. You use a formal, organized style that is very appealing to the reader. Great job.
This is a wonderful chapter. The chapter opens with urgency as Mimi and Beth are waiting to go to the club. The reader is wondering if they will get there in time. They will read on to find out. This is a fantastic opening hook. The detail puts the reader all the way into the chapter. The intermingling of personalities and relationships here is fascinating. The dialogue is well done and realistic. The characters speak like real people. The chapter is well paced. It moves fast enough to keep all the reader's attention, yet it moves slowly enough to allow the reader to easily follow what is going on in the chapter. I did come across one structural issue that needs your attention:
1)"Are you ready, Beth I am waiting you know for half an our now, could you please hurry up"-Possible rewrite "Are you ready Beth? I am waiting for half an hour now. Could you please hurry up?"
The characters are well developed and believable. They come across as real people. Great job.
This is a fantastic story. The tone is slightly mocking. It grabs all the reader's attention and makes them want to read on. The reader is wondering if Emma will eventually discover she is taking sugar pills instead of pain killers. They will read to the last word to find out. The story is about a woman who is being given placebos by her doctor but has no idea. The story is narrative as opposed to conflict based. This is rare in literature and very interesting. There is no doubt about what is going on here. The characters are well developed and believable. They come across as real people. The dialogue is well done and realistic. The characters speak like real people. The description is detailed and vivid. It puts the reader all the way into the story. The story is well structured and consistent in terms of point of view and tense. You have accomplished a great deal in just a few words. Great job.
This is a fantastic story. The tone is bitter and tinged with disbelief. It grabs all the reader's attention and makes them want to read on. The reader is wondering how the man in this story will cope with his sorrow. They will read to the last word to find out. The story is about a man who lashes out after separating from his wife. The conflict is well defined. There is no doubt about what is going on here. The characterization is fully developed and believable. The story concentrates on the man who lost his wife, and he comes across as a real person. There is only one line of dialogue, and it is well done and realistic. The man speaks like a real person. The description is detailed and vivid. It puts the reader all the way into the story. The story is well structured and consistent in terms of point of view and tense. You have accomplished a great deal in just a few words. Great job.
This is a fantastic story. The tone is filled with confusion and anxiety. It grabs all the reader's attention and makes them want to read on. The reader is wondering in which way the wizard will lead the rest of his life. They will read to the last word to find out. The story is about a centuries old wizard who is contemplating what to do with the rest of his life after leaving his wife. The conflict is well defined. There is no doubt about what is going on here. The characterization is fully developed and believable. The story concentrates on the wizard, and he comes across as a real person. There is no dialogue but it is not needed here. The description is detailed and vivid. It puts the reader all the way into the story. The story is well structured and consistent in terms of point of view and tense. Great job.
This is a fantastic poem. The tone is aggressive. It grabs all the reader's attention and makes them want to read on. The poem is about how you are a realist and what exactly that means. You remind me so much of me when I first moved out of the house and started university. I loved this poem and read to the last word. The free verse works well in this poem, and you have handled it very well. There is a wonderful rhythm here. The poem flows extremely well. It is a pleasure to read. You have used punctuation and grammar consistently in this poem. There is nothing to distract the reader from their reading pleasure. Great job.
This is a fantastic poem. The tone is filled with love and joy. It takes all the reader's attention and makes them want to read on. The poem is about you accepting God into your life. I have a strong faith and have turned to God many times in my life. I loved this poem and read to the last word. The rhyme is well done and consistent. It gives the poem a wonderful rhythm. The meter is consistent from line to line. The poem flows extremely well. It is a pleasure to read. You have used punctuation and grammar consistently in this poem. There is nothing to distract the reader from their reading pleasure. Great job.
This is a fantastic piece. The title is enigmatic and attention grabbing. It tells the reader very little about what the piece is actually about. They are intrigued and will begin to read to find out more. You launch into the piece without introduction or preamble. This takes all the reader's attention and focuses it completely on the topic and the piece. They will read to the last word. You have written about a time when you went looking for your mother's engagement and wedding rings at the behest of your father who was suffering from Alzheimer's. The reader is delighted with the look they get at you as a person as well as a writer. The length is perfect. You completely develop your topic without belaboring the issue and making the piece tedious. You use an emotional style that is very appealing to the reader. Great job.
This is a fantastic poem. The tone is formal. It suits the poem and subject matter very well. The poem is about the different types of people we fall in love with. It celebrates this diversity. I have been in love with two very different men, and cherish the memories I have with both. I loved this poem and read to the last word. The free verse works well in this poem, and you have handled it very well. There is a wonderful rhythm here. The poem flows extremely well. It is a pleasure to read. You have used punctuation and grammar consistently in this poem. There is nothing to distract the reader from their reading pleasure. Great job.
This is a fantastic poem. The tone is aggressive. It grabs all the reader's attention and makes them want to read on. The poem is about the danger the differences in religions and dogmas pose to the world. I have a strong belief, but respect others' beliefs. I know that a lot of our conflicts have been started because religion. I loved this poem and read to the last word. The poem has a unique rhyme that is well done and consistent. It gives the poem a wonderful rhythm. The meter is consistent from line to line. The poem flows extremely well. It is a pleasure to read. You have not used punctuation in this poem, but this does not interfere with the flow. You have used grammar consistently here. There is nothing to distract the reader from their reading pleasure. Great job.
This is a fantastic poem. The tone is formal. It suits the poem and subject matter very well. The poem is about a man who goes through depression and despair but finds the good in life and decides to start over. I am so happy that the man in the poem has found the good side of his life again. I read to the last word to see if he continues to progress. I loved this poem. The rhyme is well done and consistent. It gives the poem a wonderful rhythm. The meter is consistent from line to line. The poem flows extremely well. It is a pleasure to read. You have used punctuation and grammar consistently in this poem. There is nothing to distract the reader from their reading pleasure. Great job.
Hi Gracelynn,
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This is a fantastic first chapter. The chapter opens with anxiety as Gracelynn's mom is fretting over the impending arrival of her family. The reader is wondering what sort of trouble this visit might be fraught with. They will read on to find out. This is a wonderful opening hook. The detail puts the reader all the way into the story. You have set up your plot and main characters very well for your reader. The dialogue is well done and realistic. The characters speak like real people. The chapter is well paced. It moves fast enough to keep all the reader's attention, yet it moves slowly enough to allow that reader to easily follow what is going on in the chapter. The characters are well developed and believable. They come across as real people. Great job.
This is a fantastic piece. The title is direct and to the point. The reader knows exactly what they will be getting out of the piece. I have been involved in a destructive relationship and was anxious to begin to read to find out more. You introduce the topic with a brief discussion of both aspects of love. This takes all the reader's attention and focuses it completely on the topic and the piece. They will read to the last word. You have written about the destruction that come out of romantic relationships. You have done your research here. You are conversant with your topic and easily make it comprehensible for your reader. The length is perfect. You completely develop your topic without belaboring the issue and making the piece tedious. You use a formal, organized style that is very appealing to the reader. Great job.
This is a fantastic story. The tone is filled with aggravation. It grabs all the reader's attention and makes them want to read on. The reader is wondering what the speaker will write for their test essay. They will read to the last word to find out. The story is about a teenager who is taking a test but is paying attention to her fellow classmate as well. The conflict is well defined. There is no doubt about what is going on here. The characters are well developed and believable. They come across as real people. The dialogue is well done and realistic. The characters speak like real people. The description is detailed and vivid. It puts the reader all the way into the story. The story is well structured and consistent in terms of point of view and tense. You have accomplished a great deal in just a few words. Great job.
This is a fantastic poem. The tone is formal. It suits the poem and subject matter very well. The poem is about someone who is disappointed that their April Fools joke did not have the impact they intended. Maybe I don't have much of a sense of humor, but I never what to do as a trick for April Fools Day. I loved this poem and read to the last word. The free verse works well in this poem, and you have handled it very well. There is a wonderful rhythm here. The poem flows extremely well. It is a pleasure to read. You have used punctuation and grammar consistently in this poem. There is nothing to distract the reader from their reading pleasure. Great job.
This is a fantastic poem. The tone is tinged with anxiety. It grabs all the reader's attention and makes them want to read. In the poem, someone is watching the sky change after some sort of disaster. I am assuming environmental. I am wondering if the damage here can be fixed and the speaker will see the world he is used to eventually. I read to the last word to see if this happened. I loved this poem. The free verse works well in this poem, and you have handled it very well. There is a wonderful rhythm here. The poem flows extremely well. It is a pleasure to read. You have used punctuation and grammar consistently in this poem. There is nothing to distract the reader from their reading pleasure. Great job.
This is a wonderful story. The tone is filled with annoyance, suspicion and fear. It grabs all the reader's attention and makes them want to read on. The reader is wondering if Jet will be able to keep Mali safe. They will read to the last word to find out. The story is about a man who is trying to protect his sister from someone she is already close to. The conflict is well defined. There is no doubt about what is going on here. The characters are well developed and believable. They come across as real people. The dialogue is well done and realistic. The characters speak like real people. The description is detailed and vivid. It puts the reader all the way into the story. I did come across a structural issue that needs your attention:
1)In a couple of places you neglected to double space between paragraphs. You should remember to consistently do this to keep your writing clear for your reader.
The story is consistent in terms of point of view and tense. Great job.
This is a fantastic story. The tone is formal. It suits the story and plot very well. The reader is wondering if Paul will be able to find the gold his father told him about on his death bed. They will read to the last word to find out. The story is about a man who goes looking for a treasure of gold that his father told him about before his death. The conflict is well defined. There is no doubt about what is going on here. The characters are well developed and believable. They come across as real people. The dialogue is well done and realistic. The characters speak like real people. The description is detailed and vivid. It puts the reader all the way into the story. The story is well structured and consistent in terms of point of view and tense. Great job.
This is a fantastic piece. The title is enigmatic and attention grabbing. It tells the reader very little about what the piece is actually about. They are intrigued and will begin to read to find out more. You launch into the piece without introduction or preamble. This takes all the reader's attention and focuses it completely on the topic and the piece. They will read to the last word. You introduce yourself in this piece and give the reader a run down of your writing experience. The reader is delighted to find out you. The length is perfect. You completely develop your topic without belaboring the issue and making the piece tedious. You use a formal, organized style that is very appealing to the reader. Great job.
This is a fantastic poem. The tone is aggressive. It grabs all the reader's attention and makes them want to read on. The poem is about not waiting to accomplish the things you want to accomplish or enjoying the moments in your life. In spite of my determination to live without regrets, there are things I would go back and do if I could. You should take advantage of every moment. I loved this poem and read to the last word. The Haiku poetic for works well in this poem, and you have handled it very well. You have concentrated on one thing-the need to get the most out of every moment. There is a lovely rhythm here. The poem flows extremely well. It is a pleasure to read. You have not used punctuation in this poem, but this does not interfere with the flow of the poem. You have used grammar consistently in this poem. There is nothing to distract the reader from their reading pleasure. Great job.
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