Eyes Wide Shut or Blindedly Open?

Sometimes, when I laugh, I cry. I can scarce tell apart...

Eyes Wide Shut or Blindedly Open?

Sometimes, when I laugh, I cry.
I can scarce tell apart
What is funny, what is tragic,
What has torn at my heart.

Am I lifted up?
While I'm yet falling down?
Is my smile in place?
In the midst of my frown?

I can't tell anymore
What it is I do.
I guess you'll just
Have to tell me,
How I'm perceived by you.