%%USERNAME%%    %%ACCWORDS%% %%ONOFF%% |
 |  probably stuff i think is funny. or aggravating. or both. |
|
** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only ** ** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only ** ** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only ** |
| good evening, y'all-- i am but a willing thrall to my tv shows, and each thursday i'm a frazzled sack of sleep-deprived hammers because i MUST watch 'top chef' on wednesday nights, and that leaves me about 4-5 hours of sleep going into thursdays.  my brains feel shriveled. but it's worth it!!!!!  i want tom colicchio to adopt me and take me home, feed me delicious meals, let me help judge the quickfire challenges. LOVE IT. what other shows do i watch? well, um....right now, i'm also hooked on 'so you think you can dance?'. yes, yes, i know. i should feel ridiculous saying that. i am a sucker for clean, talent-based competition, and these shows just grab me. good thing there's no 'so you think you can write?' show, eh? with my luck, it'd be broadcast at 2am and i'd be completely fucked.  i also saw the 'sex & the city' movie this afternoon--i've missed the series, and always wished the story would continue, so i'm happy! the movie was an entire season of the tv show crammed into 2:20 hours. while this might sound like torture for a lot of people, for me, i liked revisiting these women and their friendships, and their search for love and/or happiness. i understand many men are uncomfortable with the level of objectification their gender suffers on the show, but i do think it's a much gentler observation than they think. i chuckle, because in how many shows over the decades have women had to overlook this very phenomenon, accepting they're accepted based on their appearance, while the male characters around them are less than 'ideal', physically? on how many shows have women played roles existing solely for the vamping, or the one-dimensional cardboard-cutout? yeah, well, that's no reason to accept the same in male characters on a show, i just smile a bit to myself when i hear men object to the show on that basis, but thoroughly enjoy 'the man show'. 'sex & the city' is written for the woman's point of view in relationships, but honors men far more often than flattens them to a mere caricature. these women are trying for love and fulfillment, and most women won't find that with shallow men...well, except for samantha. she has her good points, but i can see how she'd make some men uncomfortable. anyhoo, please forgive the drowsy rant. i'm all chock full of love bubbling to the surface, steeped in my relating to carrie's struggles and my own found bliss.  i'd read over this entry before posting, but my eyes are too tired.  here's hoping it's actual english. *crosses fingers*today's quote! "by the light of the moon when the night holds the secrets of the sleepy lagoon i'm contemplating moonlight on the water when i'm walking with you on an evening in june" --van morrison have a good night, everyone--may you dream of van morrison serenades and really good oven mitts (they're hard to find!). ** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only ** ** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only ** |
| running behind! i've got brainstormy ideas (thanks to p), but nothing written yet for today--but i gotta blog before it's tomorrow, so...i'm here! i was thinking today about dogs. how they experience everything on a sensory level, how their brains are even wired to take in enhanced perception of smells and sounds, how almost everything is delicious to them: dirt, scabs, slimy weeds, ear wax, vomitus, poo. really, they have different standards than we do. but their joy is less diluted than ours is, i think. we analyze, and judge. the lettuce in our salad is a wee smidge wilted, so it takes away from our enjoyment of it. give it to a dog, though, and it's a gift sent from the sky monkeys. while they're eating it, for that millisecond, every sense is attuned to that shred. his eyes light up, his steeth flash in that doggy smile. whatever he's doing, that dog is focused on that one thing. dogs are really zen, man. we need to figure out how to live in that moment. i think if we did, we'd spend less time finding destructive ways to keep our wrinkly brains occupied, less time worrying about other people. all right, quick quote, then i gotta go write my daily. p's breathing down my neck. (it tickles. )"As soon Seek roses in December, ice in June; Hope constancy in wind, or corn in chaff; Believe a woman or an epitaph, Or any other thing that 's false, before You trust in critics." --lord byron, that scamp. |
here's today's flash fiction:
yeah, i can't promise every day's gonna yield a stellar offering, but i'm faithful, at least. today is historic. i know everybody doesn't enjoy political topics, but that's okay--this isn't just a political precedent, but a civil rights first. and it's a beautiful thing. i've been anxious, afraid my worrying all primary season would squelch any real joy at the wonder of what's happening, but when these moments come, i'm a well of awe, a giddy font of pride in my country. *sigh* i need a moment. talk amongst yourselves: barack is neither a bar nor a rack. discuss! http://youtube.com/watch?v=BHEO_fG3mm4 today's june quotation: "June is bustin' out all over." --oscar hammerstein II |
okay, here're the first two days' worth:
proof! proof that i've been writing....or that somebody's been writing, and then allowed me to post their work under my name. hm.  |
| *pant pant* (wheeze) okay, that's all i'm saying. so far, the june challenge has been rockin'. two days down, two stories down. i'll add them to my wdc port, so i can feel the weight of double motivation. BIG thanks to dragonfly~guess who's back?  for her 'sanitation engineer' prompt yesterday.  did the trick!today's quote: "You should've gone to China, you know, 'cause I hear they give away babies like free iPods. You know, they pretty much just put them in those t-shirt guns and shoot them out at sporting events." --juno macguff (Juno) now that's outta the way, today was almost soul-crushing. i say almost because if i keep things in perspective, i have it pretty good. but if i were indulging, i'd say today sucked the big ceiling dork pretty good. and i can't really list the reasons why. the overall feeling was of feeling my soul strained out and having to watch it reenact that scene from "oliver!", where he approaches the lunchmaster ands begs for more porridge, only to be turned down with a threat of paddlin'. yeah, my mojo feels bruised. whoops! dinner! kthxbai! |
| hi, y'all. it's june!!!! i love june. it's summer, it's relaxed, it's freaking HOT, and it's my birthday month. this month i wanna include in my blog quotes about june--from movies with "june" in the title, from thinkers who have something to say about june, from people named june...that sounds fun. i did do something crazy for june, already. at my other regular online haunt, scribophile, i've signed up to write a one-page story every day for june. a new idea EVERY day. i've been a member of a weekly group for a couple of months, and that's been hard enough! but, i wanna ratchet up the writing habit. i think this'll do the trick! good god. i'd LOVE it if you wanted to join me....http://www.scribophile.com/circles/june-challenge/ okay, must go! have a lot of reviews to write today, as well as my first june story and i am determined to get back to editing my freaking novel today! *determined face* have a great day, everyone--may you all get fabulous hair extensions and work the runway FIERCE. (i've been watching 'america's next top model' this morning). "God loves you just the way you are. But He loves you too much to let you stay that way." from Junebug ** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only ** ** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only ** |
it's been five days, and i've been properly chastened by wdc and zack, both. my bum still stings.  i was lamenting the suddenly quiet chunk of my brain that controls thinking up stories, and in all the wallowing i've also managed to avoid blogging, too. *sigh* okay, well, my brain hasn't been completely dead. i wrote a sonnet the other day. i found a website i thought might help: www.seventhsanctum.com, but i just ended up wasting a bunch of time playing, instead of finding inspiration. i'm just so tired all of the time...i don't get enough sleep during the week, and don't have the mental lubrication for my story gears. but of course, this is an excuse. so, there it is. not only am i not writing, i'm making excuses. i think i'm gonna go get a coke. hope everyone's fat & happy out there, writing like gangbusters! |
| i stumbled across this excerpt from david morrell's book on publishing (and writing): http://www.bksp.org/content/view/14/1/1/0/ the article talks about why people are interested in writing. he cuts to the bone, telling us only about two hundred writers make enough money from their books to live off the proceeds. two hundred! he also talks tough about writers' reasons for wanting to write, and takes us through his thinking for his. interesting, and compelling in spots. my favorite moment: "If you follow the logic in the progression of these questions, if you pay attention to the ferret that's gnawing inside you, you'll have a subject matter that's uniquely your own. You'll also approach your favorite type of story in a way that has special meaning to you. You'll be an original and not an imitator. Because you're true to yourself. Because you use your unique one-of-a-kind psyche as your guide. It may be that you'll never be one of those 200 writers who earn a living at it. But that was never the point in the first place. You didn't become a writer to make money. You became a writer because your ferret and your daydreams/nightmares forced you to. If you do achieve financial success, all the better. But in the meantime, you did what you knew you had to, and your reward was--only now is it a valid answer--the satisfaction of self-expression, of being creative." |
| we watched this movie several days ago: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0464141/ 'el orfanato' (the orphanage) on the surface, it's a slightly off-standard ghost story. great atmosphere, foreboding setting, beautiful cinematography. i loved the restrained feel to the scares--nothing too graphic (well, except maybe one moment ). but creeeeeepy. whew. i saw it days ago, and it keeps floating back into my head. images, feelings...and independent of the plot, which is interesting. it's all about how i felt as i watched it unfold, not the events themselves. the film ends up in a very different place than i expected, but somehow manages to retain that otherworldly feel. i won't tell you it's the BEST MOVIE EVER, because that'll just doom it to never reaching the expectation. but it was pretty darned good. if you're in the mood for a beautiful, heartfelt and seriously creepy film, check it out. if you do, get back to me so we can discuss certain...things.  whoop! will be back later--must go help with dinner. food!! |
| another link! p keeps sending me this stuff. this one will swell your heart to bursting--nothing like the power of the word. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SawtfQmirkI&feature=related o captain my captain! |
| okay, this is just goofy and groovy as hell, and i had to pass it along. this video was a student project. she received an A+. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-aGTNS13SDU watch out....naughty word alert!! |
here's this week's flash fiction:
i wanted to write a larger story, and will keep working on it, but my weekly circle has a 1000-word limit. darnit. this flash fiction is difficult! anyhoo, i have deep, dark ideas for where this is going....mwuahuahuaaaaa!!! i hope everyone's having a fabulous evening, full o' nub. |
| this is probably gonna sound weird, but here it is. i love having argued with p. i don't like the arguing, and the upset, but when we get down to the nitty gritty and hash it all out, i'm amazed every time. i suck at fighting. i grew up in a defensive, passive-aggressive family, so i get all passive and awkward, and then i dwell, waiting for the worst possible hammer to drop. then i lash out as a defense. i know. you'd hate it. i know i do. even as i'm saying these things, or having these awful thoughts, i'm watching and telling myself to stop it, to be reasonable. but my pride and this paralyzing fear get in the way and stop me from stopping myself. oh, it's a mess. maybe it's partly a girl thing, i dunno. but p, while he can be very 'guy', very stoic and tight-lipped, also understands i'm a girl--a different creature. sometimes i need him to say or do things, and while he maybe doesn't get what the big deal is, he'll do them for me because he knows it helps. and he almost never loses his sense of humor...except for the few times when i push his buttons hard enough to harsh his mellow. so, today we hashed out a thing i'd been dwelling on for weeks--a minor thing, relatively speaking--and it took all of five minutes, once we started talking. and after, we were all overflowing love and generosity, grateful to be good with each other again. this may seem normal to you, i don't know. but for me, this kind of honest resolution and mutual respect is mind-blowing. i hate when we fight, but when we make up, i fall in love all over again. (yeah, i'm a big sap.) anyhoo, otherwise, i've got two different stories bumper-pooling around in my head. gotta write something down! i hope you all had days filled with sugar donuts and organic guatamalan coffee. full-on half & half. dude. |
| "in most good stories, it is the character's personality that creates the action of the story. in most of these stories, i feel the writer has thought of some action and then scrounged up a character to perform it. you will usually be more successful if you start the other way around. if you start with a real personality, a real character, then something is bound to happen." --flannery o'connor i lit up when i read this. i feel like i'm a good writer, but i couldn't get why my stories didn't feel 'real'. this is why! when i'm thinking up stories, i think of a situation first. i wonder, 'what if a little girl buries a tooth and it sprouts?' i focus on the event, and not on creating a real person for a character. epiphany!! so, the next step is...figuring out how to know someone so well i can create him from the inside out. this writing business is complicated. |
| i was at work the other day, walking down an aisle behind a young woman. a petite young woman. for some reason, the thought, 'i walk lightly upon the world' popped into my head. i don't know if it's a partial quotation from somewhere, but it struck me. weight upon the world, and its different meanings. when i was a young(er) woman, i was also very petite. i'd been a gymnast, and had good muscle tone. i was solid for my tiny size. still, unless i could use physical leverage, my strength was limited to my body weight. i weighed 92 lbs. my step upon the earth was pretty slight, and i viewed the world as a tiny person--how i related to men, other women, authority figures. also, as a young(er) woman, while i'd had weighty experiences--most thrust on me by circumstance--i hadn't yet developed the sense of self to lend me the perspective to absorb these lessons and filter the world through them. i was still firmly planted in my one-sided view of things...the view of someone with smarts, but not enough experience to identify with people different from me. i could sympathize, and wonder. i certainly refused to acknowledge any biases i might have. i wanted to be a serious person, and followed cues appropriately. i read serious literature, i discussed shocking truths with my colleagues. i longed to walk on the world with more substance, to leave a noticeable print behind. so, i'm older now. my step is definitely leaving a deeper mark in the sand. and my perspective has broadened. i'm sure i won't understand what it means to age and grow feeble until i experience it directly, but i'm starting to have an inkling. i'm much more aware of what people can and will do, both to and for each other. and i'm confident enough to admit i don't know as much as i should. i'm beginning to see the arc of my life through a broader lens.but what had me chuckling, as i watched this slight woman strolling along, was that as much as i wished i carried more gravitasse when i was her age, now i wish i walked as lightly upon the earth as i did then, but didn't know it. i wish i could return to myself and somehow implant in my mind the knowledge that enjoying the moment is a fine way to pass time. that worrying about every little thing doesn't really help or change anything, and that finding myself in the regard of others only shows me what others think of me, and not what i think of myself. hunh. anyway, i came across this AMAZING video (about 6 minutes long) on andrew sullivan's 'daily dish'. (see link to site along left column...) like he says, if you're afraid of heights, watch with both hands on your armrests. but really, beautiful video. blew me away. talk about having a light step. http://www.brightcove.tv/title.jsp?title=1438490562 have a good night, everyone. may the good pastry fairy leave you sweet nibblings. with icing. |
 yeah, there's that blue month. right down the crapper! |
| hi, y'all. lessee...what's going on in my life today? geez, i wish i had something exciting to report. you have no idea how much i wish i had something exciting to report. i have 32 minutes to come up with some blogworthy event . . . blanking . . . blanking . . . *sigh*. we worked, played with the dogs, ate some food. yep, this is what i'm saying to you. in fact, i may just go find something else to eat...maybe i'll choke on it and have something to tell you. hang on...brb. nope, didn't work. although, now i'm so full i may just puke. so hey, there's something a little out of the ordinary. for me, anyway. i tend to hold onto my food. so, here's the question: is it better to blog with nothing to say so you can claim the 'blue month', or wait until you have meaningful thoughts and/or adventures to blog about even if they occur once every few months or so? hmm...don't laugh! i'm really asking! anyway, i hope you all had at least one unique moment today. if it involved cake, more the better. have a good night. *smack* (sloppy kiss) |
| when is may day? is today may day? i feel like skipping around a maypole...would you like to join me? tra la laaa!! (i should probably shave first--right now i sound like a cricket rubbing its legs together. ) may 1st...yep, this will be a blue month. a blue fuckin' month, if i have anything to fuckin' say about it. lame, i know. stupid joke. i....couldn't help myself. this is what three nights' worth of too little sleep does for me. me tired. me sleep soon. verrrry soon. i wanted to write a story today, but so far have only come up with a glimmer of an idea...i was thinking about voudou. about working the cliched voudou doll idea, giving it a twist. we'll see if it works out. also, i was reading andrew sullivan's daily dish today, and one of the links took me to a collection of victorian photographs. photographs of recently deceased folks--young, old, all posed as if sleeping. one young lady was even draped across a chaise lounge, her cheek resting on her hands. these pictures are moving, and i can't pinpoint exactly why. i admire how naturally we used to see death, as another step along the path. these families didn't fear their dead, they embraced them, dressed them in their finest, recorded their image as if in ceremonial reverence. death now feels so foreign -- if we're lucky, i suppose -- so sanitary. people pass away, and strangers arrive to process the remains. sounds cold, doesn't it? i haven't researched the legalities, but i imagine we couldn't take care of our own without breaking some law. i assume we couldn't bury uncle festus in the back yard without a permit of some kind, perhaps some zoning ordinance. it's all just so weird. to paraphrase charleton heston in 'soylent green', "it's people!!!!" we die, all of us eventually, and somewhere along the way we've developed a squeamishness about this inevitable end. how have we removed ourselves from such a universal experience? something we all share, either as a witness, a perpetrator, the one who dies. anyhoo, where'd that come from?? i'm gonna go to bed, now. i hope you all had a relaxing, peaceful day....chock full of nonpareils. dark chocolate. |
| ooh! i forgot to mention: goto http://www.espressofiction.com this week--my story's highlighted! woohoo!! my first published story. |
| hey, y'all-- check out pauluk's new interactive:
fun!! the daffier the better! clearly, a blue month in april ain't happenin'. i'm saving my energy for may. i'm optimistic. fired up, ricky bobby!! this story a week thing is humbling. makes me realize how little control i have over my brain. coming up with story ideas? that's his dept. i bring him offerings: pancakes, rum, cigars....oooh!!! a voudou story!!! yes!!! thank you, O Brain! tomorrow, i bring you a goat. why, no, i haven't slept well this week. why do you ask? sorry entry is lame--may you all have days filled with supercool thinking and fluffy pillows. (not that kind, ean. you beast.) |
View Portfolio
Visit Notebook
Send Gift Points
Awards
Badges
Send Email
Community Newsfeed
General Discussion
Sponsored Items
Book of Trinkets
Static Items
Books
Groups
Interactive Stories
Audio
Campfire Creatives
Community Notes
Crossword Puzzles
Documents
Folders
Images
In & Outs
Madlibs
Photo Albums
Polls
Product Reviews
Quizzes
Survey Forms
Web Pages
Word Searches
