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Review Requests: OFF
1,485 Public Reviews Given
1,578 Total Reviews Given
Review Style
I look for a good hook at the beginning and like stories that "hit the ground running". Good plots with a theme, strong characters with an emotional impact, moving dialogue, sensory descriptions, clear communication and words with a purpose are strong points of a good story.
I'm good at...
knowing a good story when I read one. I like to read as much as I like to write, maybe more. I will let you know when a sentence just does not make sense to me, and I will try to give you my opinion on how to make it better.
Favorite Genres
biographical, family, drama, mystery, comedy, nature, young adult
Least Favorite Genres
sci-fi, erotica, fantasy, mythology
Favorite Item Types
short stories, essays, fiction & non-fiction
Least Favorite Item Types
novels
I will not review...
novels...sorry, no time
Public Reviews
Previous ... 11 12 13 14 -15- 16 17 18 19 20 ... Next
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Review by Happy Mom's...
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
Hi Snow,

I like the way you set up your story, mentioning the nightingale in your first paragraph. I knew it would have something to do with your plot. You also laid out Lydia's distrust of the myth of the nightingale, good foreshadowing.

Your story is well-written, easy to follow, with no grammar or punctuation errors that I saw.

I liked the way you brought the wolves into the story, and the way the cat showed no animosity toward the birds. This made your story almost Biblical, the cabin is presented as a safe-haven like the Ark.

Good luck with the contest. I hope you win.

Write more,
Connie

My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Go Noticed" .
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Review of Beach  
Review by Happy Mom's...
Rated: E | (5.0)
Hi Word,

I love the first two stones...I guess because they bring back such vivid memories to me. How did you do that? I felt just like I was in the water....again. When I was young, my family and I went to the beach at Lewes, Delaware. It was renowned for jellyfish, I think at a certain time of the year. I was never stung, but as you say, we briefly touched, many times. I loved being in the water so much nothing could keep me out. And then there were the huge waves at Rehoboth. Your Crest-break-roll made me shiver with excitement. Thanks for bringing back these special memories!

Write more,
Connie

My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Go Noticed" .
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353
Review by Happy Mom's...
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
Hi You....

A mixed-up drink, I assume, and bad karma as well. This is a cute story and gave me a laugh. Actually, I do know a few "real" people who are hooked on Dr. Pepper (not sure if your friend is real or not). And, yes, I think you are right...it's the sugar that is the offender.

Dr. Pepper is okay once in a while, the diet kind, but not very often. My doctor tells me "dark" sodas are bad for your bones. The phosphorus draws out the calcium. It's been a very long time since I had one, and you are smart to quit, even if it was for the wrong reason *Smile*.

Thanks for sharing this cute story...and please keep writing.

Write more,
Connie
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Review by Happy Mom's...
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
Hi Judity,

Your story came up on the random read and I wanted to let you know my thoughts. I love stories that have strong themes and this one begs to say, "Be careful what you wish for."

Your story was very well written. and I noticed no errors in spelling or punctuation. I did see a couple of tense changes that gave me a small bump, past when they could have been present, but they were hardly noticeable.

This was a good story, well-told, with excellent advice for us all. Thanks for sharing.

Write more,
Connie
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Review of My African Gray  
Review by Happy Mom's...
In affiliation with The Talent Pond  
Rated: E | (4.5)
Hi Lisa,

I'm returning your favor of a review. Clicking on your port, I was immediately drawn to this poem because I can relate to it. I have an inlaw with an African Grey who actually whistles the complete tune to Bridge Over the River Kwai (he sounds much much better than this) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=83bmsluWHZc

I am always fascinated by it. I could see him perfectly (even though it's a him) through the words of your poem. You have good rhyme and rhythm and paint many wonderful pictures. May your pet live a long, long life and continue to be good company.

And please continue sharing and...

Write more,
Connie
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356
Review by Happy Mom's...
In affiliation with The Talent Pond  
Rated: E | (4.5)
Hello Kathie,

This is a lovely way to memorialize a patient who has held a special place in your heart. You have helped to make Pam immortal with your words.

Your reminiscing is easy to follow and was very touching. Thirty-six is such a young age to be taken away from family, so many memories still to be made. A loving family and caring people such as yourself, I'm certain helped to make her last days bearable.

Please continue to write and share other stories.....

Write more,
Connie
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357
Review by Happy Mom's...
In affiliation with The Talent Pond  
Rated: E | N/A (Review only item.)
Hi Princess Megan,

Your story came up on the Random Read and made me feel so good I had to let you know....I am such a sucker for stories told by animals, expecially cats.

The story is told well, and I had a little "heart lurch" each time Tigger met up with someone, wondering if now something bad was going to happen. The idea of an orphanage run by nuns was a perfect ending to your story. And the reuniting of Tigger and mom was even better. (I liked your pictures, too.)

Thanks for this enjoyable Sunday afternoon read and please.....

Write more,
Connie
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358
Review of Shutterbug  
Review by Happy Mom's...
In affiliation with The Talent Pond  
Rated: 18+ | (4.5)
Hi SoCalScribe,

You came up on the Random Read again, and since your other story was so good, I had to read this one and comment, too.

Oh, to have one of those cameras. No, that would be too dangerous, holding life and death in our hands.

Your story reminded me of one of those old Twilight Zone shows, or maybe Outer Limits. The pace was good, it held my attention and was well-written, although about half-way through, I figured out the ending.

Thanks for sharing this, and....

Write more,
Connie
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Review of Martha  
Review by Happy Mom's...
In affiliation with The Talent Pond  
Rated: E | (5.0)
Hello Bertiebrite,

I found your story on the Hub Page and after reading it, I wanted to share my thoughts with you.

I think the story is very well-written, it flows smoothly, has just the right amount of description to put me in the picture, and the action moves along enough to keep me interested and reading.

You gained my sympathy for Martha right away with the tale of her hardships and losses. At some point in the story, I'm not exactly sure where, I realized Ben was dead.

You write this with such kindness as though Martha may have been your grandmother or great-grandmother. I enjoyed the sprinkling of bits of history. It anchors the setting of time and place.

Thanks for an enjoyable Monday morning read and please...

Write more,
Connie
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Review of Transference  
Review by Happy Mom's...
In affiliation with The Talent Pond  
Rated: ASR | (4.5)
Good Afternoon SoCalScribe,

Your story came up on the Random Read, and your first paragraph hooked me. I had to read on to see how he got there and why the doctors were letting him get up off the operating table. Sort of unusual, I thought.

You kept your pace steady enough to hold my attention and gave me little hints of what was transpiring. About half way through, I began to wonder if this person was superhuman or something, and when the cloning was revealed, all was explained.

Your title is a good one. It did not give away the story and yet at the end, it all fit together.

Thanks for an enjoyable read and please...

Write more,
Connie
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Review of Fairies  
Review by Happy Mom's...
In affiliation with The Talent Pond  
Rated: E | (5.0)
Hi Silverquill,

Your poem came up on the Random Read, and your title made me smile and think of St. Patty's Day coming up.

You've written a lilting, whimsical poem, just the kind I like. Your mood is happy, yet I think there is a little warning in there somewhere *Smile*.

I like your reference to the butterfly, and yes, I think they could be fairies. At least they are not to be understood by the likes of us *Bigsmile*.

Your rhymes are good and the rhythm could not be better. You make me want to go outdoors and look for butterflies!

Hope you're having a great day, and thanks for sharing your views on fairies. Oh, and...

Write more,
Connie
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Review by Happy Mom's...
In affiliation with The Talent Pond  
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
Good Morning Vagabond,

Your story came up on the Random Read, looked interesting, so I read on. The contest description under your title looked interesting as well...write a story without the letter "u". That eliminates "you", a very common word. I've already used "your" and "without" in this short paragraph. *Smile*

Your story sounds like it may have happened. And what you found out years later, reinforces the validity of it. Isn't the internet wonderful?

Your title fit even though it covered a lot of ground. Something more to the point like "Terror at the Pond" would have been a stronger hook for me and still not given away much.

Your pace was steady. You never lost me, but a few sensual experiences could help make the situaltion more tense, such as tripping over something, a funny smell, or strange noises. They may not have been part of the "real" story, but as a writer we have the liberty to invent things to make them more interesting.

I like your last paragraph implying the picture was of a real person. It ties your story together and leaves the reader with something to think about. Good job.

Thanks for the interesting morning read and....

Write more,
Connie
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Review by Happy Mom's...
In affiliation with The Talent Pond  
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
Hi Hooves,

I thoroughly enjoyed the introduction to your port and look forward to nosing around some more. Your pup is adorable, but then I have found all bassett hounds to be that way *Smile*.

Your sig for tHINg looks suspiciously like something I may have watched on TV a long time ago... the monsters or munsters or something like that *Bigsmile*. It looks as though you have been very busy on the site, and your huge number of monthly reviews has not escaped my attention either. My hat is off to you!

Please forgive the brevity of this review, but I am eager to look over your "remooing rules" and the other links you have provided.

Thanks for stirring my interest and please...

Write more,
Connie
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364
Review of Lilac Time  
Review by Happy Mom's...
In affiliation with The Talent Pond  
Rated: E | (5.0)
Hi Fyn,

After clicking on the Random Read, I found your day-brightening poem. I mean that literally. It is dark, cold and pouring rain here this morning.

What a picture you create, one every aged couple longs for. Jim and I are there right now *Smile*. I want to be sitting in your garden, with my loved one, smelling the lilacs and completely at peace with everything.

Thanks for turning around my day, and...

Write more,
Connie
365
365
Review by Happy Mom's...
In affiliation with  
Rated: E | (4.5)
Hi Joel,

I stopped by your port and since you had this story highlighted, I thought it must be a good one. I wasn't disappointed. I assume this was probably a true tale of your childhood. I love to read these kinds of stories and yours is very well-written. You kept the action flowing just right.

I kept thinking to myself as I was reading, "now isn't that just like an eight year old boy?". If it wasn't true, it certainly was a good made-up tale (no pun intended) *Smile*.

I like the way you set me up in your first paragraph by telling me the teacher described you as easily distracted and a distraction to others. I was waiting for the catastrophe to unfold.

I really liked the quick, on the spot, mouse costume you made yourself. An empty toilet paper roll nose with rolled tin foil whiskers brought forth an amazing "mousy" picture in my mind. Too bad you could not figure a way to get it to stay in place. And I don't see a thing wrong with tin foil ears. You had way more imagination than your teacher!

Thanks for the fun read and the snapshot into your childhood (if it was) and do....

Write more,
Connie
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Review by Happy Mom's...
In affiliation with The Talent Pond  
Rated: E | (4.5)
Good Morning Sybil,

I found your name on the anniversay list for today. Congratulations on your ninth anniversay on writing .com!

This is a very well-written story on the "having a baby" process. The poor husband has no idea what he is in for. I'm certainly glad they made it to the hospital.

Your colloquial dialogue seems very naturnal. I found no problems following the storyline even on the first read through. The first person approach fits the story well and keeps the suspense at a high pitch. I kept thinking they weren't going to make it to the ER.

I loved the oohs and aahs over the little baby girl and the complete turn around of the husband from never wanting another to when can we have the next one. Isn't that the way of it? We forget pain so quickly when good things come from it.

Thanks for an enjoyable early morning read.

Write more,
Connie

Anniversary Reviews email siggie
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Review by Happy Mom's...
In affiliation with The Talent Pond  
Rated: E | (5.0)
Hi BScholl,

Okay...you got me on that one. I found your story by clicking on the Random Read, saw the (2nd Place) and figured it had to be a good one. I was not disappointed *Smile*.

As I read, I did begin to wonder how the title was going to play into the story, but you managed to keep me in the dark until the very end. What a little rascal *Smirk*, the grandson, not you.

Jason almost tipped his hand by asking if something was wrong but the suspense continued to build as the reader was unaware of what the other grandchildren had been told. Good forewarning here.

I liked your dialogue and the way the tags helped to "show" your story. If you got 2nd place, I'd be interested in seeing number one *Wink*.

Thanks for the enjoyable read and....

Write more,
Connie
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Review of Snowed In  
Review by Happy Mom's...
In affiliation with The Talent Pond  
Rated: E | (4.5)
Hi Coffeebean,

Your story came up on the random read and since it gave me a chuckle, I had to let you know.

Your character is fixated on honey buns. If he cannot have the real thing, then maybe he can make do with some of the ingredients.

I like the way the wife tried to get his mind on other things (eyeglasses and toast) and yet he is drawn back to honey buns everytime.

The story did turn out well and thanks for sharing this little part of your character's day. It just goes to show, if you have enough imagination and staying power, you can turn anything into a good story. *Smile*

Write more,
Connie
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Review by Happy Mom's...
In affiliation with The Talent Pond  
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
Hi Mara,

What a heart wrenching story you have written. Your character comes to life for me with your descriptions of her emotions.

You succeed in keeping the tension building in your story, calling me along with your words so that I cannot stop reading. Well done.

I like the way you began with your character full of her grief, then flashed back to the cause. It worked well to hook me and create interest in your story.

I understand perfectly why it was published and congratulate you.

Write more,
Connie
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Review of The Lesson  
Review by Happy Mom's...
In affiliation with The Talent Pond  
Rated: 18+ | (4.5)
Hello Grampa Mike (and congratulations if that's a new thing),

I stopped by the Flash and clicked on your entry to see your response to the prompt. Looks like it's very appropriate.

I enjoyed the story you tell of something that happens too often, unfortunately. You tell it well and made it sound natural through dialogue and narrative. Employing the words of the victim and the need to inform the second patrolman of what had happened worked well and added to the naturalness of the story.

The admonition at the end made a lot of sense and served to reinforce the prompt. Good job.

The hairspray and lighter as a blowtorch is scary...hope I never live to see that in person *Smile*.

Write more (and good luck),
Connie
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Review of The Scorpion  
Review by Happy Mom's...
In affiliation with The Talent Pond  
Rated: E | (4.5)
Hello Vermillion,

I enjoyed this little vignette about an encounter with a scorpion. It is certainly up close and personal. Your descriptions were like a slideshow going through my mind.

You set up the scene well in your first paragraph, I thought, comparing the man to the tree. Your writing hinted of Poe, intense, personal, building suspense.

The image you create of the poison hanging like a teardrop above a pit of tar intensified your character's concentration on his fearful situation. Great job with this.

Write more,
Connie
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Review by Happy Mom's...
In affiliation with Rising Stars of WdC  
Rated: E | (4.5)
Hello to the word bending turtle,

You suggest interesting answers to an often-asked question. Your first proposal is that some people may be scared of poetry as if it might hurt or devour them. What a vivid image you present.

I especially enjoy the change of font to emphasize the images you want to create. It works.

And, yes, sometimes we do get the idea the author is speaking directly to us. This is the best, to be involved in the poem and understand the meaning, as we see it. It may not be what the author intends, but this is how we really "see" the poem and it becomes real for us.

As you suggest, poetry can be many different things to people, and that is what makes it so interesting.

Thanks for sharing your unique take on this...and please keep writing.

*Smile*Connie

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Review of Dried Up  
Review by Happy Mom's...
In affiliation with Rising Stars of WdC  
Rated: ASR | (4.5)
Hi Destinydances,

I dropped by your port and this one caught my eye. It turned out to be about just what I was thinking of. I get in the same boat often. The title is perfect.

I like the way you talk to yourself. I find myself doing the same thing many times. I think it espectially helps with the poem's flow.

Your tone is reprimanding and admonishing, slightly discouraged, but eager to try again. We tend to express ourselves this way too often, I think. Praising ourselves seems wrong. I think you do a good job of getting it all out and maybe getting rid of all the negativity that way.

I enjoyed the image of a derelict muse. I pictured a homeless person with a shopping cart full of pens, pencils, paper, and no place to sit.

Thanks for sharing your poetic rant at the muse...and please keep writing.

*Smile*Connie

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Review of Heads Up  
Review by Happy Mom's...
In affiliation with The Talent Pond  
Rated: E | (4.5)
Hi SoCalScribe,

I stopped by your port to return the favor of your review.

As I read this story, I kept wondering , "What is next?" I liked the way this was written, straight-forward and easy to read. At this time of day it was exactly what I needed.

You surprised me with the ending. I thought you had blinded some poor person trying to get on the subway, and I already envisioned you standing before the judge. Thank goodness, the penny's magic finally came through.

Thanks for an enjoyable and light-hearted story with a happy ending.

*Smile*
Connie
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Review by Happy Mom's...
In affiliation with The Talent Pond  
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
Hi Les,

It delighted me to read this informative well-written article about donkeys and mules. You have whetted my appetite to learn more. I especially like your natural voice.

I spent a lot of time when I was very small on my grandparents farm, but for some reason, I was shy of most of the animals. Now that I think about it, the mean bull they had was most likely the reason. It's a shame how one animal can taint your opinion of others, just as you remark about the "stubborn mule".

I have gotten over some of the that shyness and sometimes prefer animals to people...depending on the people.

I enjoyed your information about George Washington and the background of mules. I am sorry to say I am one of those people who don't know much about them. It seems horses always take the forefront, but as you say, the mare is a necessary part so that may be okay.

Thanks for sharing this slice of life. It sounds like you have a wonderful job. Please keep writing and sharing and I'll keep reading.

*Smile* Connie
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