I am being honest when I say that I am not usually one to be taken with spiritually themed items but this seems to be quite the contrary for me when I read your item "Field of White"
I found I was able to relate to the item in many different ways. The desperation for solace and peace, the need for further guidance and a beacon of any kind to move me away from my own shadows is something I have experienced many times and yes, during these times I have found myself trapped in prayer. There is a strong sense of not only wisdom but an understanding in this item which reached out to me and drew me into the depths of this Poem.
It is beautifully written, articulately worded and in general an item which demands attention from all who stumble across it. Once again, it was a pleasure to have viewed something of your creation. Outstanding!
Thank you and write on.
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Invalid Item This item number is not valid. #1525013 by Not Available.
I am here to give you review 2 of 3 from "Invalid Item" .
The first thing I will say is great title and description. I came across it and couldn't NOT read it.
Your Poem reminded me of an old movie I once watched called 'I spit on your grave'. Essentially the movie was based upon someone who was sexually assaulted by a group of men and decided there was no better justice than her own and single handedly killed them all one by one. This Poem is in close relation to the justice served from the wrongs which occured, bypassing the logistics of the law.
Again, you have captured an urban legend theme in this item and I am always a sucker for this kind of writing. It is interesting and seizes my attention easily.
There seems to be some slight timing issues in your item. Nothing extreme but noticeable nevertheless. One such instance occurs on line 6. The off beat in the rhythm paused me in my tracks and I was forced to re-read the previous line to be sure it wasn't just the way I read it. After going over it a few times the pause was still there so I suggest you take another look and try to strengthen this part of the item.
There are no visible grammatical errors in your item.
All comments and suggestions are offered in the spirit of helping you to improve your writing. Please feel free to take onboard anything you deem is helpful and discard the rest at will.
It was a pleasure to read this Poem.
Well done and write on.
** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only ** Helping Hearts leader.
Invalid Item This item number is not valid. #1525013 by Not Available.
I am here to give you review 1 of 3 from "Invalid Item"
I was hooked from the first two lines and was overly eager to read this item. I knew from the beginning I was in for a treat as this item seems tailor made to my personal preference and love of all things dark and morbid.
The whole urban legend vibe received from this item is wonderful. It was chilling, creepy and drew me into the depths of the content. I was in two minds about what I was expected to feel for the character. In one case I felt sorry for her because it seemed she was chosen for this doomed fate but she was made to seem so evil and impure that I wondered if I should be feeling triumphant that she was killed. It was very confusing but piqued my interest level to its peak.
As always, you are a man of craftsmanship and you have certainly delivered in this item with your presentation and wordplay. The image helped me to conjure a visual of what she may look like and this was great because the viewer was not given this information except for a description of her 'brand'.
The one aspect of this item I feel needs attention is your punctuation. The syllable count goes unnoticed as you have severed crucial lines with a period instead of allowing them to continue on. This put too many pauses in the item and threw the rhythm right off the mark. I suggest you take another close inspection of ways you may be able to remedy this.
All comments and suggestions are offered in the spirit of helping you to improve your writing. Please feel free to take onboard anything you deem is helpful and discard the rest at will.
This is an item I would encourage other viewers to read.
Well done and write on.
** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only ** Helping Hearts leader.
Invalid Item This item number is not valid. #1525013 by Not Available.
I am here to give you review 3 of 3 from "Invalid Item"
I love this story. The twist was great and one I did not see coming. No clues were given that there was even a twist on the way!
The attitude of Ted is one you would expect from a person subjected to these circumstances. He was sour, surly and bitter and I feel this added volume to his overall character.
I would have liked a touch more information though. Why had he been sent to prison? What was his charge? Was Ted a dangerous person or a victim of circumstance? These questions left unanswered made it more difficult for me to connect with Ted because I knew nothing of his background nor did I know how he managed to get himself into this predicament. Some further emphasis and information will remedy this hitch in the road.
There are no visible errors in your item and suggestions have been made. The twist was definitely the highlight for me.
A job well done. Write on.
** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only ** Helping Hearts leader.
Invalid Item This item number is not valid. #1525013 by Not Available.
I am here to give you review number 2 of 3 from "Invalid Item"
I feel this item may need some more information for it to be received correctly. Is this intended to be an item of prose/short story or an article? I suppose it has the ability to fit into any of the three sepcifics but I feel it is more suitable to an article as it is informative and educational. These are just my personal thoughts and by no means do you have to agree with me.
Until this moment I had never given any real thought to fog/mist in general. I admire that you took the reader into this topic with an in-depth insight and I began to wonder if my own country has any specific terms for this weather condition. It is something I will go on a mission to find out now. LOL
The lay out of the item was not as effortless to follow as your previous item. This is not necessarily a bad thing but I feel that jumping from a detailed insight into fog and then crossing over to talk about chipmunks was a little odd and very random. The transition was not very smooth and this is something I would suggest you take a closer look at.
Nevertheless, I did enjoy the item and it gave me food for thought.
All comments and suggestions are offered in the spirit of helping you to improve your writing. What I see may not necessarily be your own perspective so please take onboard anything you deem is helpful and discard the rest at will.
Well done and write on.
** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only ** Helping Hearts leader.
I am here to give you review 1 of 3 you will receive as part of your package from "Invalid Item"
I enjoyed this story because it opened up my imagination. It was refreshing to read an item which branches more into the fantasy genre as opposed to emotional items which we are able to connect with.
Your item was fun and unique and no effort was required to hook my attention. You snared it from the beginning and sustained it through to the finale.
My mind was racing at 100 miles per hour whilst I was reading this. A snowsuit with such power equals monumental mischief in the hands of a child and yet you refrained from allowing Robbie to go out of control. Personally I would have got right into the nitty gritty's and allowed my character to be become somewhat of a 'Dennis the menace' but the simplistic approach you took was not harmful to your item but rather direct and satisfactory.
I admired the lesson of justice you incorporated into the item. Robbie stole the game whilst wearing the suit but unfortunately for him was unable to keep it when he stepped out of the suit without thinking. Let this be a lesson taught to the younger generation that all actions have a consequence.
There are no visible errors in your item and suggestions for improvement are not required.
You delievered your story quite well.
Well done and write on.
** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only ** Helping Hearts leader.
Invalid Item This item number is not valid. #1525013 by Not Available.
I am here to give you a Helping Heart and Review Fools review.
I enjoyed the development featured in this Poem. There is a timeline which is easily followed because it is clearly displayed to the reader. The item begins in the child's early stages and takes us on a journey through growth and life stages faced by this individual. It was like looking through a photo album except reading it.
I have only one suggestion for improvement and this is to edit some of the larger lines in the content. This aspect of your poem hurts the overall flow, pace and rhythm and if you were to consider my suggestion I feel it would be beneficial to the general quality.
All comments and suggestions are offered in the spirit of helping you to improve your writing. Please feel free to take onboard anything you deem is helpful and discard the rest at will.
There are no visible errors and suggestions have been made.
Well done and write on.
** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only ** Helping Hearts leader.
Invalid Item This item number is not valid. #1525013 by Not Available.
I am here to give you a Helping Heart and review fools review.
This Poem drew me in and kept my attention focused on it 100%. I loved it!
The rhyme combined with the elegant wordplay is very poe-esque. I actually read the item another two more times after the first. I cannot think of one solitary suggestion to make for this item. Everything is balanced perfectly and reads smoothly. No adjustments are needed.
It seems the dog has the same affection and devotion you obviously have for it. It was great to watch this relationship nurture and unfold. There isn't really anything else I can say about it except Bravo!
There are no visible errors and suggestions for improvement are not required.
An excellent read and one I would recommend to others.
Well done and write on.
** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only ** Helping Hearts leader.
Invalid Item This item number is not valid. #1525013 by Not Available.
I am here to give you a Helping Heart and Review Fools review.
This Poem was such a breath of fresh air to read. It was fun, witty and highly entertaining.
I am the complete opposite and my room was always meticulously clean but I am the eldest of four and my OCD did not stem to my sisters and brother. This item sounded exactly like their rooms during our childhood. They were always late to all engagements because they were never able to find anything.
The format is great and a delight to read. At no point were there any bumps in the road.
There are no visible errors and suggestions for improvement are not required. I think this is outstanding exactly the way it is.
Well done and write on.
** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only ** Helping Hearts leader.
Invalid Item This item number is not valid. #1525013 by Not Available.
It is amazing that you are able to set such a clear and vivid scene with a total of 11 words, but that is exactly what you have done.
I think you have aced the word selections you have made for this item and the second line is by far my favorite because I find it to be the most visually potent.
tilled by summer's warm caress,
I love this line!
My only suggestion is to add a period at the end of the final line.
Thanks for a great read. Well done and write on.
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Invalid Item This item number is not valid. #1525013 by Not Available.
I can say with complete honesty that I thoroughly enjoyed this Poem. You have clearly depicted one aspect of the circle of life very clearly and I feel this was expressed perfectly.
The colorful imagery was a bit startling for the theme of the content but this is just another unique implement which stamps your name all over this item.
It was interesting to read and kept my attention completely focused on your item from the beginning to the end. I also found your item to be slightly depressing because it has been expressed with simplicity and this enforces just how quickly time does fly by without us even knowing it.
There are no visible errors and suggestions for improvement are not required.
It is a great read. Well done and write on!
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Invalid Item This item number is not valid. #1525013 by Not Available.
There is a strong story line to this Poem. To love another who is bad in every possible way for you is something which happens all the time. The person becomes a poison to everything that is relative to you but they crawl under your skin and become addictive, further spreading their toxins.
This aspect of your Poem was powerful and captured my attention with ease.
The item ends on an inspirational note when the person/you becomes aware this person is not good for them and severs all ties which bind them together. It does not take very long for this person/you to see the negative influence you were mesmerized by.
I feel nothing needs to be altered in the content but rather added and this addition is in the form of punctuation. At the moment there is no flow or rhythm because the punctuation is missing so your item reads more like prose. Once this implement has been incorporated (if you choose to do so) the item will imropve in leaps and bounds.
There are no visible errors in your item and suggestions for improvement have been made.
Well done and write on.
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Invalid Item This item number is not valid. #1525013 by Not Available.
The mischievious nature of the child in this Poem and the terrible pranks featured snared my attention with ease.
I couldn't help but laugh when I read it purely because it brought back memories of things I had done to others over the years during my adolescent streak and also things my children take great pleasure in doing to me now LOL.
If I had not read the description I would have thought this Poem was based on a poltergeist.
I feel you absolutely 'nailed' the eccentric sense of humor children possess in this item. It was a fantastic read and I feel no suggestions for improvement need to be made. It's great as it is.
Well done and write on.
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Invalid Item This item number is not valid. #1525013 by Not Available.
I thoroughly enjoyed reading this story. It was shame it came to an end so quickly because I was so submersed in the content.
It was very creative of you to write it from the viewpoint of Sarah whilst she was still serving her prison sentence. This alone, kept me completely intrigued because I have yet to read a story which is even similar to this. A fanstastic and refreshing read!
The end was great. All those 50 years spent illegally obtaining comfort upon her release and then not being able to remember the address or the key, blew me away. This aspect of the story helped to signify her age and put further emphasis on just how extreme her sentence was. 50 years is such a long time to have lost, especially when taking the blame for another.
There is only one word in this item I will make a suggestion about and this is:
Line 3- She knew none of the watchers was aware...
May sound better as 'She knew none of the watchers were aware'.
All suggestions and comments are offered in the spirit of helping you to improve your writing. Please feel free to take onboard anything you deem is helpful and discard the rest at will.
Thanks for a great read. I wish there was a part 2 to this item.
Well done and write on.
I was weaving through your port and came across this folder. A folder which has snared my attention and accumulated much time on the old clock as I have reviewed many of the items displayed within there. It seemed ridiculous not to review such a folder.
This is a folder which houses faultless writing of the upmost quality and I can assure you, you have a fan in me! I was quite taken aback when I noticed that every item in this folder has received an award until I actually read and reviewed some of the items myself and now I can see why. They all deserve the recognition they have received.
It has been a pleasure to review your writing and I can guarantee you that I will not be a stranger to your port.
Well done and write on!
Wow...this is a fantastic beginning to what promises to be an interesting and well told story.
There was so much happening all at once and I was completely mesmerized by both leading characters.
The highlight for me is the imagery. You go to such lengths in all of your items to make the reader feel as though they are there with your characters. You leave no stone unturned and the delivery of small but important details make your items more special.
The intensity of the attraction shared between these two strangers is palpable. It can be felt with ease and it continues to mount in strength as the item continues to unfold. I loved it!
There were two small bumps in the road within the item and they were:
1. 'Bosses'. As I am Australian and write to meet this standard, I am unsure if this is classed as an error for you or not. Usually when bosses is spelt this way it indicates there is more than one boss. I thought I should bring it to your attention just in case.
2. There is no reason for 'Technicolors' to be capitalized. I suggest editing the 'T' to lower case.
As always, it was a pleasure to read your writing. I admire the sensational effort you put into all you create.
Well done and write on.
Let me begin by saying that there is nothing at all about this item I do not like.
You begin this Poem in a dark and ominous tone right from the onset. This attracted me to your item and began to entice the connection between myself and the Poem. The couplet format helped to ensure my attention was snared because it is a form I enjoy reading and writing to.
The beat of your Poem is sobering and quite somber. This was great because it matched the overall theme of the Poem very well.
The rhyme fits nicely and there are no visible errors. My only suggestion is to enlarge the font. It gets a bit tricky to read.
This Poem titled ~a diamond in the rough~ has been written in the couplet format. This is a format which I admire and enjoy reading so you had me hooked from the very beginning.
The highlight of your Poem for me is the descriptive wordplay. Your examples of what you deem to be a diamond in the rough are detailed, flamboyant and very easy for the reader to invoke a visual whilst reading your Poem.
I feel the repetition is overdone and would nestle within the item more comfortably if you were to limit it to every second or third couplet. This would allow more room for the full force of your imagery to shine through without being overshadowed. Of course this is just an observation and by no means do you have to agree with me.
I also happened to notice that there seems to be a lack of capitalization at your appropriate starting points. This was a facet which exposed itself to me immediately and I am thinking perhaps if it was able to capture my attention so effortlessly then it could possibly do the same to others. As I am new to reviewing your work I will assume you are a free form Poet and not make any suggestions in this area.
Great imagery, fantastic description and in general a feel-good Poem.
It was a pleasure to review you. Well done and write on.
My review has been submitted for consideration in "Invalid Item"
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Invalid Item This item number is not valid. #1525013 by Not Available.
The highlight in your story for me was the view point it was told from. I enjoyed reading this from the woman's perspective in the present tense. This aspect of your story reeled me in with ease.
There is a lack of trust being shown within the realtionship of the couple featured in the story and it is justified that this is no assumption but a conclusion which was come to with good reason. The woman would like for her partner to be reliable, trustworthy and somewhat responsible and the man seems to be unable to adhere to any of these traits which is beginning to breakdown the value of their relationship. This was a great storyline and one which is followed without complication.
The downside to this item is that many errors both spelling and punctuation can be seen within it. Certain lines are in need of a re-work to help them read smoothly. I also happened to notice that there are many words which are irrelevant and not needed and these take up space and draw your story out.
I believe with another quick glance at this, you will be able to find all of these errors very easily.
All comments and suggestions are offered in the spirit of helping you to improve your writing. Please feel free to take onboard anything you deem is helpful and discard the rest at will.
Thanks for a great read and I do hope my review is of some help to you.
Well done and write on.
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Invalid Item This item number is not valid. #1525013 by Not Available.
After reviewing an item of yours not long ago I have become completely addicted to your writings and couldn't keep away from your name on the Order Board.
I was thoroughly impressed with this item. There is a deep story line, a clear meaning within the story and a smorgasboard of many different emotions.
The main character in your story is named Abby and she is a woman who suffered a vicious attack which left her deaf as a result. The highlight for me was that you never lost sight of this fact and as such you increased her remaining four senses in place of her sensory loss.
It was interesting to watch the immense guilt held by the male character in this item. He blames himself for the horrifc event Abby was forced to endure and feels the need to make it up to her at every given opportunity.
The love shared between the two people is a love of purity and unguarded connection. It was very beautiful to watch how these two people come together in many different ways and offer such wholesome support to one another.
There are no visible errors in your item and there is absolutely nothing I would change.
Thank you again for another stunning read.
Write on.
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Invalid Item This item number is not valid. #1525013 by Not Available.
Hello 🌕 HuntersMoon
I am here to give you a {iyem:1525013} review.
This is a very creative item. Your ability to fearlessly attempt foreign writing techniques is splendid to watch.
It is obvious to all, that you have the imagination of the writer but it seems you also have the heart too.
I enjoyed everything about this 'mirrored acrostic'. I imagine it must have taken a lot of effort and patience to bring it to this standard but you made it work and for this, you should be proud.
There is a nice show of word play in this item. Considering the restrictions placed upon the writer I expected some of your item to stall or perhaps sway off its true course but it stayed on track and did not skip a beat.
I have only 2 suggestions for you:
1. Keep watch for double spacing. This occurs on lines 3, 6 and 12.
2. Be on the look out for repetitious words. There are a few areas where I noticed multiple references to certain words. Be sure these do not creep up on you because they have the ability to harm most aspects of your writing.
This was a great effort and a pleasure to read.
Well done and write on.
Hello Warlock1111
I am here to give you a Helping Heart review.
The rhyme in this Poem is fantastic. I enjoyed the mixture of direct and indirect rhyme and I think you sewed it together quite well. What an imagination you have. The content was very unique and I was completely enthralled by it. Not for a moment, did my attention wander off.
Your item has no punctuation and usually this would affect my rating but I enjoyed the Poem so much that I will overlook it and rate your item on content quality only.
Continue to let that imagination soar above and beyond! Thank you for a great read.
Way to go!
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Invalid Item This item number is not valid. #1525013 by Not Available.
This is such a sad Poem made even more unfortunate by the fact this does actually happen to so many women. The vicious cycle of abuse is depicted well in your item. The unanswered questions, the deterioration of hope and a sense of helplessness are just a few emotions named which are depicted potently within the item. If only more women were able to seek the courage to leave instead of being left with a tragic fate such as this.
There are no visible errors in your item and suggestions for improvement are not required. This Poem speaks for itself.
Thank you for allowing me to read your moving words. It was a pleasure.
Well done and write on.
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Invalid Item This item number is not valid. #1525013 by Not Available.
This is a fantastic shop which offers individually unique images for personal use. I don't think there would be anyone who would not like what you have to offer.
The information displayed in the forum is detailed and any and all visitors who come to your shop are well informed as to what you have on offer, changes you are able to make to suit their own personal preferences and how much your services cost.
The prices are very reasonable and affordable. I am sure this shop is going to be a huge success.
Now I am aware this exists, I will be sure to bring some business your way.
Way to go! Best of luck with it.
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Invalid Item This item number is not valid. #1525013 by Not Available.
Please stop by and check out: "Invalid Item" . You have to be in it to win it!
Congratulations on your nomination into "Ink Blot Hall of Fame" . You were nominated to receive a Hemingway package. I am here to give you the final FAN-ATIC review you will receive as part of your package.
This is such a potent Poem full of painful recollections and emotions which are jaded. It is a Poem I am able to relate to very well because I find myself in and out of this same situation. Sometimes the charred memories we are left with after a series of traumatic events are just as real as the situation which occured to begin with. It is a battle which, I can tell you, does begin to ebb and receed over time, if you allow it to.
I think you have expressed yourself particularly well in this item and your talent for tapping into matters of the heart is on display for all reviewers to see. I hope writing becomes a theurapetic tool for you as it has for me.
Again, my only suggestion is to add some punctuation to the item. In this case I feel the item requires it because without it, the Poem reads as one long passage without taking a pause for breath. Punctuation is the cure for this.
All comments and suggestions are offered in the spirit of helping you. Please feel free to take onboard anything you deem is helpful and discard the rest at will.
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It is interesting and seizes my attention easily.
